Big Jim Tartanfarts Boozy Trip to Copenhagen Commentary by Allaster McKallaster #scottish #commentary #scottishcommentary #scottishfootball #mckallaster #scottishannouncer #scotland Video credit: BBC Archives

it’s the day before Scotlands first qualifying match for the 1974 World Cup finals and after a long summer spent trying to forget recent humpings the Tartan Army are getting warmed up for the campaign ahead with a full Scottish breakfast Big Jim Tartanfarts has decided to cycle all the way from Braemar to Copenhagen to see his beloved Scotland take on Denmark he’s also planning to meet up with his old flame Inga Legopaants he’s not seen her in 40 years but he says that she’s promised him a free ticket for the game and a kiss on the cheek if he can make it on time it’s over 600 miles to Copenhagen but Big Jim knows a shortcut he’s also stashed a few essential provisions along the way time for second breakfast lunchtime afternoon tea finally Big Jim arrives in Copenhagen but has he made it in time? [knocks on door] unfortunately not however he’ll be glad to hear that Scotland beat Denmark by 4 goals to 1 six weeks ago and as for Inga Legopaants she’s been dead since 1958 fortunately Big Jim has left himself plenty more surprises for the way home

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12 Comments

  1. A boozy bike ride to Denmark ? How about a mushroom induced Pogostick hop to Germany ? I mean your nuts will be well and truly omelettes after that but nothing a good beer can't fix. 😁

  2. If Jim had married Inga, her death in 1958 would have saved his wife from witnessing the horrors of 1966, when England beat Germany to win the World Cup – the sassenach cheats that they are!

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