Burnout | Swindon Road Race

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Swindon Road Race was a tough one for me, a race where i think i should have done everything better. It was hard and fast, the numbers dont lie and for the short period that i was in the race it felt like a blistering pace. Some great bike riding from everyone invovled and a cool course, just wish i had brought along a better version of myself. More training needed.

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Morning. Morning. Morning. We are down at Swindon CC for the Swindon road race. It’s an early one, guys. Welcome back to the Whatife. Let’s roll. [Music] Okay. Swing CC boys who I’ve raced with quite a lot actually. This is a 34 today. There is also a 234 that happens after this. Give you some info about the course and the setup. We got the Swindon boys all ready to roll. Um race with them at Abington quite a lot which is quite cool. So they are hosting today’s race. Thank Lord there’s a coffee machine cuz it’s really hot the last few days and I am not sleeping whatsoever. So sign on then we’re getting a coffee. How many how many wheelers do we have in the three four field? Okay. Full team. Sorry. Is that as in you’re saying that as in like you’re only allowed six or you saying that as in like Yeah. Oh, really? Is that a British cycling thing? Uh oral thing. I think if we could, we’d have got 20 in it. Yeah, we we could about 20. But I think it was based on the amount of people entries in the race. So if you had 60, you’ll have six riders. And you had eight people you have cuz I think it was so you have six in the 2 three four and six in the three four or five five in the three four because it’s how many teams are in oral is it 10 so six lots of 10 60 and that would be a full field. Okay. So there’s so you got so basically there’ll be a bunch of people that effectively racing the oral league point league point and then a few people like me who aren’t part of that individual. Yeah. Who like make up the numbers for it to be like a road race. So if they Yeah. They all had the full team. You wouldn’t have got in. Yeah, that’s I think that’s what they said. Yeah. If everyone That’s why I had to wait until everyone had basically signed up to then get close. [Music] I am 51. Is that how many people are racing today? Yeah, at the moment. Oh, okay. You can keep taking on the days. [Music] [Music] right, we got ourselves a coffee, got some bibs. I’m number 51. I think there’s 51 people registered for today. This is a league race, which means that you can have six riders per team for a league event. I’m obviously not in the team, but I am going to catch up with the league guys um and get in on some of their team tactics, see what they’re doing, and they’re going to give me a bit of an insight into how they would race like a team team race. Um but yeah, I’m still out here solo, doing it solo, racing solo. [Music] Right. So, what do you guys need to know? Um, nothing really. We We feel quite good. I feel like we’ve been improving and it’s 14 loops of a just under 5k course. 44 miles, whatever that is in K. like 70 odd K. And yes, that’s it. That’s all I got for you. [Music] Right, we got an hour hour until the race. Half N I think is when we kick off. Suited, booted, 20 minute warm up. Back for the start line. um catch up with the lead guys because they’re going to give me an insight into what they are going to do in terms of tactics and then hopefully I can be part of that or at least see it happen. Right, let’s get ready. Um and if anyone wants a sticker, if you’re ever out in a race or an event, come say hi and grab one. [Music] [Applause] [Music] [Applause] Right, we’re going to go and give the course a little look. It’s a 5k loopish and little kicker, which they reckon takes, you know, a minute and a half, maybe 2 minutes. And they reckon it’s about 7 minutes a loop. Right. So there is a little climb. It’s you know the last time I did So the last time I did a 34 race was actually the reading race which I think might have been part of the same league and that actually worked out all right but that was seven laps. This is 14 laps. Similar thing with the hill in the reading. You know when we did that reading race little kicker of a hill same thing here. I think that’s going to be like the key part of the race where you’ll get a few people maybe just attack take it up the hill quite hard. So what’s my plan? Um I think I have to ride it like I you know have started riding races which is try and sit in a good position nearish the front and then hold on for for two three laps. see what the vibe is and then just kind of at least be in a position so that if it gets taken off the front of the hill, I’ve got half a chance to go with them. But this is the other thing is you don’t want to go with whoever’s attacking up the hill every single time cuz we do that 14 times. So you’re going to cook yourself. So that’s the problem. That’s that’s the conundrum of like bike racing is picking the attacks to go with and then also finding a way to go with an attack that’s not going to cost you too much energy. I don’t have the answer to that. We’re just going to figure out how see how it goes. And um yeah, looking forward to it. Feel quite good. Yes, let’s go bike racing. Let’s go bike racing. Honestly, I don’t know who the to trust. Is it my friend or my give me that? I remember back when I was younger, I was happy. Now they feel like [Music] Right guys, let’s go racing. I’m going to give you a full lap here because I want people that might want to come do this race to see basically what they are in for. So we’re on the course. Um the map top right, it has the start finish line probably in the wrong place. I will give you a nudge when we get to the start finish line. You can basically see that fundamentally um it’s a loop like I said done it many times and it’s just over 5k 3 miles 200 bit miles and it’s it’s brilliant and you do it a ton of times. The straight that we’re on now that we’re on the course this is neutralized. We got we got the car just in front of us. You will see when that goes the neutralized zone lasts maybe 90 seconds. You know, we left the HQ, come down the road, get onto the course, couple of, you know, what, 30, 40 seconds down the course, and then the neutralized car, uh, the the commissioner drives off, and we are un kind of under race conditions. And talking of race conditions, open road racing, we’re in the UK, this is a 34 race. The right hand side of the road is you should not be crossing the center line very much. That’s very much against the rules. So trying to stay on the left hand side of the road. Uh in the UK we obviously drive on the left and other than that uh they they the commissioners or or and the bike escort. And you can see we’re underway now. You can see that the watts have come on. This is the this is the hill that we are taking on and we’re just about to get to the start finish line. So a little bit power as the uh convoy drives off and leaves us to to get going. And I’m probably sat too far back. My own fault. And my I I’m gonna go ahead and just say I think my position is pretty terrible all day. Not sure whether it would have changed a huge amount. I just don’t think I brought kind of the best version of myself to this race. Anyway, so we’ve This is it. Start finish line. Just about to cross it now. This is the start of the lap. There we go. Cool. So we’re underway. You can see on the map which part top right hand corner which part of the course where that start finish is. And then we come down a hill and you get this sharp left. Two things to note about this course if you are thinking about riding it or if you were riding it. The two key sections are obviously that hill because it breaks it up a little bit. Kind of makes it hard. Then you get this downhill section and then again if you look at that map top right hand corner there is that sharp left-hander. It’s more than a 90° left-hander. Um you know it’s like a 120°ree. It’s it’s or no what is it? Well yeah I don’t know how it works but it’s a sharp left-hander. little grate on the ground as well that makes that you shouldn’t really cover the just to point out that at the road crossing you obviously have the bike envoy the car envoy that will close the crossing for you. So riders moving out to the right hand side into the other lane at the um junctions is not so bad because the junctions are effectively closed. Well yeah for for the bunch of the for the lead riders and the bunch the junctions will be closed. The second thing to point out is obviously you get the hill which will break things up. This section here coming around this corner then it kicks on and you can see that I hit like 900 and something watts um just coming coming through here. It kicks on and this was the section that would break it up more so than the hill. So the hill takes it up kind of strings it out a little bit. You come downhill for a little bit of recovery. Then you come into this straight section and you can just see that we’re holding the watts on and it’s kind of come out of that corner and it just gets hot straight away. Now I have a bit of a funny race. It doesn’t really work out for me. I’m not like Yeah. Oh, and also side note that bike um just in front of me there, the Windspace that used to be my bike. I sold it on eBay for like 200 200 and something quid it went for. So I mean always keep an eye on my eBay but um I think it got like bar and bar and frame for like 250 quid. absolute bargain. Love seeing it racing. Anyway, um my point being that I had didn’t have a good day. Just don’t think I brought the best version of myself, but also I do think the watts for this race were quite tough. Um it always seemed like it was pushing quite hard watts and having to work quite hard. I kind of got to start respecting some of these road races a bit more. I’m not a big road racer. This will be like my third one for the year. Um a lot of fun. and I enjoy them, but they they can be really hard. And when and when the watts come on and it gets hard, I just didn’t have that like top 10% today, which really really showed. And it showed in my positioning cuz you can see that I’m always kind of like at the back of the bunch rather than trying to get up into the middle of the bunch. And I don’t know why, for some reason, I thought, oh, we’ll do like maybe two laps and just kind of see how it goes. And then after two laps, we can kind of start worrying about it. So, we’re coming up to a second junction in a sec. So, if you are racing this or if you are thinking about riding it, the things to worry about are the hill and then once you take that left-hander, it gets hairy down here and my day gets a bit awful. I end up getting dropped off the group, end up getting back on the group, then I get dropped off the group, then I get back on the group. Um, and you can’t keep doing that all day. I certainly can’t keep doing that all day. You can see that we’re all over the road here, which I’m just kind of always coming up to a junction. Obviously, obviously fine, but I always get a bit kind of like I always try and stay left of the center line if I can. Like 1 th00and watts coming out of that corner. Probably a bit unnecessary. So, this is probably the only easy section of the course where things calmed down uh a little bit. And I say that whilst we’re actually doing like 5 600 W kind of through the wheels as So, ultimately what ended up happening for this first lap was a couple of the riders took it off the front. A couple of the guys who who I know have their CAT 2 card are now like taking it off the front. I’m trying to get like a little bit of a better position. Just moving out the group a bit. Um as as and when I can trying to figure out like the best place to sit in the group, move up if possible. And the two riders basically kind of went quite early to ride off the front and then obviously the group starts chasing them down after a bit. And that’s why the first I think it was like the first three laps were hard like super hard or I certainly found them super hard anyway. And I think lots of people did because you know I think once we kind of get into the meat of like what starts going on in the race you’ll see how many people kind of start dropping back and then getting back on dropping back getting back on. And 51 riders. I’m not sure how many cross the finish line. Maybe 25. So I I I think it was something like that. So, we do lose quite a few riders coming through. And this section here, we got a few roundabouts, a little bit of road furniture, that kind of stuff. Um, and this is the only section where you can see that the road quality gets a little bit iffy. Uh, the the road quality in general is great. It’s just this little section here. I also know that the Swindon Wheelers, who host this race, use this as their like Tuesday night chain gang route. So, they know it very well. I imagine they know every kind of inch of the tarmac. like they know where all the holes are. They know how to take all the corners which does add up. That kind of stuff like having that kind of course knowledge really does add up. This was I didn’t actually do kind of like I guess like a sighting lap. I just kind of rode up the hill, did a bit of a warm up and then dived on the start line. So, we’re about to come back to effectively the hill. So, I I basically survived lap one. I’m in the bunch. I’m trying to move forward a little bit knowing that my positioning in the bunch is going to be I’m going to be way better off if I can be further towards the front knowing that there’s a climb so I can just if needed move backwards through the bunch on the climb gives me a little bit of leeway rather than being at the back cuz if you’re at the back on the climb and you’re moving backwards you’re just off the back. So, kind of be in a good position for the climb, but obviously with a couple of the riders, I think, start attacking the climb, riding off front and trying to like take it away. I mean, that’s brave. I know Joe was one of them. one of the league boys uh took it off the front early and yeah, it’s kind of like a brave move to try and ride it off the front with a couple of guys into into what is effectively like going to be like an hour and a half hour and a half race. So, this is basically we just hit the climb now and I’ll take you through it once we get up the second climb. Once we get up the climb for the second time, we’ll dive into some of the thick of what actually happens to me during the race. But that’s the lap. That’s the loop. It’s it’s pretty simple, pretty straightforward. Two key points, hill, sharp left-hander. Um, once you get through that sharp left-hander, the the the watts just stay on for that kind of straight section. You can see us taking up this hill uh quite hard or having to ride quite hard to stay with, you know, the front group, you know, 600 odd watts. I don’t know what that is in watts per kg, but you know, I’m 77 kg at the moment, maybe. So, you know, and and the group is for the best part kind of moving away from me a little bit or like the front of the group is certainly um and there was 14 times you were going to have to do this. So, that will bite at some point. It will bite as we cross the start finish. So, that’s a full lap and we come over the top. You come into the lefthander as we come through here and you can see where things start going wrong for me. This might be a lap or so later. Kind of over the grate there. And then you can see that the group is just kind of just ahead and they just like you got to put the watts on coming through this corner. Yeah. So I dropped. So we we’ve skipped a lap out and then just the amount of hard work I was having to do just I didn’t ever feel comfortable really. And that’s what basically cost me was that down here having to put like the you can see the watts. I’m so happy I rode this on on the SLC with the power meter so that you can actually see like how hard uh I was having I was having to work um to kind of get this and my FTP like 295 maybe I think at the moment. So I was really having to like dog out most of the early stages of this race. Loop it back round to the back half of the race after we kind of dropped off like we lost the main bunch. found a little group and the front bunch shot off because they were chasing down guys off the front. We had quite a good group now. So, I guess the plan was stay in the group, try and use them to get through this and kind of see how it goes as we kind of take it up the hill again for I don’t know what this is, maybe the fourth time. But still having to ride it quite hard cuz we can just about make out the the bunches in front of us. So, if we keep on it, if we keep riding hard, we’re going to hopefully get back onto the group. And that’s exactly what happens. Like I said, I I get dropped off the group, get back on the group, then I get dropped off the group again, then I get back on the group. And yes, it is from that senses, this race doesn’t necessarily come across as very well, from my perspective, didn’t come across as very measured. For me, it was just like right go you know, and you’re recovering when you can, but the goes were just too hard for me. So coming up the climb this time. Still trying to hold high 400s 500 watts. Um to get over and trying to hold hold this little bunch’s uh wheel. Just making sure that I wasn’t dropped off like kind of I guess like doing just enough to try and stay stay on the bunch and hoping that as a bunch we can kind of bring it back to the group. And the problem is is that when the bunch itself and once we caught them at the bottom of the hill, once the bunch itself is like sat up recovering and we have to use that time to try and chase them back on, you know, 900 watts coming out coming out that corner, we don’t get the recovery that some of the the group get. So, having made it kind of back to the bunch, we now get the fast section that’s around the back side of the course. And I kind of know coming into this. I actually think in a second you’ll see me mentally kind of give up. Um I kind of mentally just like check out. I’m like this is too much for me. I can’t keep doing this. We’re lap like four. Four of 14. And I’m like I cannot keep doing this. And a few of the guys come past me. You’ll see that in a second. And then you’ll just see me kind of be like I can’t. But then the group slows down. When the group slows down I’m like okay one more kick. And I just about make it back onto the group. So, so the group is moving away from me here. My watts kind of come off. You can see me being like, I can’t do it. I can’t like. And so, my watts are low. Guys come past me and I’m I’m kind of like morally like in the bin. Just don’t have the motivation to want to try and keep pushing. Guys coming past me. I’m like I’m like, how is everyone riding so hard? I just couldn’t do it. I didn’t have like yeah I just don’t think I had the willpower to kind of do it like my body wasn’t really it’s funny because you know referring to this as like a bit of burnout. What I tend to find is neuromuscular as in what you ask your muscular muscles to do they’re so good at doing it but the problem is is that your central nervous system just doesn’t have the capacity to in force that whole thing to work together. Um but I do see the group slow down. I see everyone come together so it’s not strung out. So I was like, “Okay, kick.” And then I I put this little kick in just to get back onto the group. And if that group hadn’t slowed down and sat up and the the giveaway for it sitting up was the fact that it’s like four across, you know, four, five across the road rather than strung out. So I was like, “Oh, the group must have sat up. They must have slowed down.” That’s what encouraged me to get back onto the group. But luckily guys, it doesn’t last for very long because we get around the other side of the course and we come into the climb. The group moves up the climb like some of the guys start attacking it. Um, I do my best to not be in anyone’s way. I remember a few guys being like on your left like, “Oh, just coming through.” I’m like desperately being like trying to get out of everyone’s way. Kind of hold my watch. Do what I can, but just try and not stop anyone that wants to try and close the gap or shoot a gap because we are again, or certainly I am moving backwards through the group. As you can see, I just didn’t have the watts. my heart rate didn’t really get as high as I would have liked. Um especially kind of what felt like it felt like I was working incredibly hard but not getting the payoff. So as we come up this climb, I don’t know what it is like maybe fifth time now. This was kind of like me just kind of cream cracker. Just couldn’t do it. I couldn’t keep doing it. Um the what’s I feel like I I I say this afterwards. I do feel like I have the capacity to do it. I just feel like this was just like not a good day for me. Um, and I think on a course like this, it just absolutely caught me out 100%. And this is basically it. I think I lose touch of the group as we come down the hill and then like I said, you get that little sharp corner. People kick out that sharp corner. Once people kick out this sharp corner, as you’ll see in a second, I just what I should have done. No, actually, no. I don’t I don’t think I could have done anything more. But obviously coming down the hill, if you work a bit harder, you end up kind of getting back or or closer onto the group. But I was having to use that descent, the little roll down the hill as recovery. So I don’t think I don’t think on this day I could have done much more. I think um even if I could have, it would have only been like lasting a few extra laps. I get this corner very wrong, by the way. That doesn’t work out well for me. And then we kick out the corner and then it’s just gone. Like it’s, you know, happens in like heartbeats, right? Even though you’re putting the watch down, the group just absolutely moves away from us. And then you’ll see once we’re outside of the bike and car convoy, once you’re outside of that, it’s not a course that allows you to then try and ride back onto the back of the group. We got outside the convoy, so it means the junctions were not closed for us. So, we had to ride that uh a little bit more cautiously. And then you’ll see here that we end up with a bit of um traffic. And not blaming anyone, like this is just what happens when you fall off a group. Like you see the traffic come in and then this is, you know, that’s it. That’s good night. You can’t kind of sit behind a car um coming up to a junction. No one’s fault. It’s just just is bike racing. We’re off the back. It’s off. It’s our, you know, our bad. But the end just That was hard. The hill makes it difficult. Yeah. Well done. Oh my god. I think I think I need to take some time off. Um I’m not feeling 100%. That was up that hill was hard, but I should I should have that by now because Yeah, I I should have that by now. I have I have that I have those watts. I think I’m I think I’m trying to do too much. I’m not recovering enough and I’m just making it super hard for myself. I’m caught in a really It’s kind of like a fortunate position. It’s I love telling stories of these different races and I think I think it’s cool that I get to do that and like come to Swindon and show you the course and what type of race it is. I love doing that, but I’m caught in the trap of enjoying it for one, enjoying it too much for two, which means I’m trying to race twice a week. And it’s I’m just getting absolutely cooked. Like, it’s Sunday today. Monday and Tuesday after the VIA weekend, I basically didn’t get out of bed. I just I did my work and sat in bed working and napped. I had I was napping three times a day or twice a day. Yesterday, two naps in the day. Um, I’m asking I think I’m just asking too much. I don’t think I’m just not in my 20s anymore. And I think it’s showing cuz I had that I feel like I had that in my locker to at least hold that group, but I didn’t. So, I don’t have it in my locker if that makes sense. Like, you can think you have it in your locker, but if you don’t do it, it’s not in your locker. And that’s where I am. And again, I I feel like I’m doing myself a disservice by racing and performing like that because a these races are getting stronger. 100% these races are getting stronger. I’ll have to put the stats in. I I raced this with a power meter because I wanted people to see the power the numbers because I think that is quite important so people can come see whether they want to come do it. And like I’m 77 78 kg. My legs feel really like the lactic, you know, when you’re going through and you’re going anorobic and your legs are just aching and lactic burn. I was pushing through that and I was like, “This really hurts, but I can still pedal.” So, my lactic uh clearance feels like it’s it’s good. I finally got to that point in the season where your legs are like, “We’ve got this. You have got better at clearing lactic whilst still doing the thing.” But I just I just don’t feel 100%. And I need to sort that out. Otherwise, I’m just going to be making crappy videos, not performing. Um I think I’m making it may maybe cycling is becoming a bit too much for me. As in like I it’s become too much of my life and I should find maybe another hobby. Maybe I should get a girlfriend. Maybe that will help. But good race. I just wish just I you know, Friday night went out and did a tempo tempo ride with some boys and it’s Sunday morning. I just feel like I’m letting myself down a bit and I don’t like that. But that that race was cuz it’s a 5k circuit, 7 minute loops. Yeah. And then you kind of the nice thing about it is that you learn the part of the course where the guys like to take it off the front and there were some strong riders. I know for a fact there’s a couple of boys in there who throughout this season have managed to be to basically become cat 2. Um and they’re just waiting for their points to clear on British cycling. So yeah, there’s strong riders in there. So I just I feel like I have that in my locker. I have that in my locker to to hold that group. I just I didn’t. So, can I say that? Oh, well. Oh, well. [Applause] [Music] I just don’t think today was my day. Well, I guess that’s what you got to tell yourself, right? so that next time you can at least come back, give it another shot. So now that the 34 race has been done, apparently didn’t see the finish, wasn’t there? Um, they have a 234 that’s happening now. So it’s been fun to catch up with a few of the other guys who are going to be here and racing that. my thoughts on this race. I wish um not wish I need to start respecting I need to respect road racing a bit more because I’m not treating it like I would if I relate it to like going to do a half marathon or a marathon. I’m, you know, going out and trying to do too much for the week because I’m enjoying being on my bike when in actual fact I need to like chill out and just start. And I know that people are going to write about having a coach and stuff in the in the comments. I think we’re almost at that point. It’s just I’m enjoying it. I’m enjoying telling the story of it. And the problem, not the problem is, but I think these Cat 3 races or the Cat 3 riders are getting really strong. Like really, or I feel like they’re getting really strong. I did 50 something minutes normalized at 3010 watts, maybe 305 watts, something like that. um which is which is hard because yeah that is hard. I also think that this part of the season a lot or not a lot but like a couple of the guys in our 34 race have got their points to now be cat 2 but because they entered this race before going up a category they are still able to ride this race. So effectively you are racing a three four race with cat two ability riders because they’ve got their points. So that again makes it hard. And those were the laps that were really hot was when the cat 2 riders Joe and a couple of the other boys were taking it off the front and they were hooking into that little lefthander and holding threshold down there. And because it was stringing out into that lefthander because it’s a tight left that comes back on itself. I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t I couldn’t do that all day. I did I did what I could. But yes, we are going to have to start respecting I don’t think I’ve got any more road races booked in. But definitely need to respect and I’m going to respect all my races a bit more which is why I can’t do on Tuesday night. Uh, not Hillington, um, Goodwood on Tuesday night because I can’t keep making videos about getting shelled as much as I am enjoying it. Right, thanks so much for sticking around. Please do like and subscribe and I will see you on another one soon. It hurts to live the way. I don’t mind the pain and I like to feel the shame of it. Why would you leave?