Northernlion’s Most Viewed Clips of 2023

the good times are in fact rolling

my new video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ReKoHXi1YWI&t=17s&ab_channel=Bentz2

Subscribe to Northernlion on Twitch and YouTube:
Twitch: https://www.twitch.tv/northernlion
YouTube: youtube.com/user/Northernlion

My Outro Song:
Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/track/093T3WcjD8O5tf7m9iSmfd?si=8e6f34b9e6124d95
Apple Music: https://music.apple.com/us/album/is-it/1669212008?i=1669212009
YouTube Music: https://music.youtube.com/watch?v=yAomY2uBQ4Y&feature=share
Soundcloud link: https://soundcloud.com/bentz-891911510/is-it?si=1b2b5cae6110401aa3969ec594b3b1d7&utm_source=clipboard&utm_medium=text&utm_campaign=social_sharing

follow me on twit twit: https://twitter.com/Bentzlive

100 – 0:00 – 11 beers deep
99 – 0:56 – i dont know how long that door is going to hold that spring man by the way
98 – 1:13 – bread recipe from NL
97 – 2:09 – how minkus is made
96 – 2:44 – baby fussing or crying?
95 – 3:36 – Thank you mister toilet
94 – 4:20 – ball tightener
93 – 4:49 – funny story
92 – 5:01 – NL finds his ideal FPS
91 – 5:16 – TRUEING
90 – 5:59 – NL does a jerma bit
89 – 6:13 – NL discovers react streaming
88 – 6:32 – Joel
87 – 6:47 – Egg rips of jerma again
86 – 7:38 – NL has trouble with French Kino
85 – 8:38 – average jackbox game
84 – 9:20 – NL owns a kid
83 – 10:20 – stuck between a rock and a hard place
82 – 11:20 – Spitting truth
81 – 12:18 – NL has an existential crisis
80 – 12:53 – grippy soles
79 – 12:22 – NL almost goes too far
78 – 14:27 – does apollo know
77 – 14:50 – how much for you to merp George Lucas’s shmerp
76 – 15:50 – Bon Cop Finish
75 – 16:50 – reddit thread about things that blow your mind
74 – 17:37 – NL gives marketing advice
73 – 18:37 – world’s smartest streamer
72 – 19:09 – k8 has intel
71 – 19:52 – NL builds a car
70 – 20:18 – NL get freaky with it
69 – 20:23 – NL has feelings about the gaming industry (and life)
68 – 20:54 – NL’s hot take about Bananas
67 – 21:43 – ***burster
66 – 22:17 – NL with the riposte to a chatter
65 – 22:50 – NL turns the tables on a chatter
64 – 23:40 – NL spitting facts
63 – 24:16 – the roast of NL
62 – 25:09 – thay call them goals but they’re anything but
61 – 25:24 – HUH?
60 – 25:52 – Critics
59 – 26:13 – za za
58 – 26:42 – Soup over Child
57 – 27:27 – disaster strikes for NL when going into settings
56 – 28:18 – Respectful Eyes
55 – 29:03 – NL on LOL
54 – 30:03 – what golf’s all about
53 – 30:52 – glock genes
52 – 31:52 – NL simulates what it’s like when only the Dads arrive at the daycare
51 – 32:30 – NL gets his drip stolen
50 – 33:22 – NL accurately describes League of Legends
49 – 34:06 – HUHH
48 – 34:24 – No Respect in Pokemon Go
47 – 35:24 – seek help
46 – 36:24 – Suika game has NL feeling nostalgic
45 – 37:10 – Streamer therapy session
44 – 37:30 – NL has thoughts on Barbarians and the Gauls Controversial
43 – 38:10 – NL has traditional values
42 – 36:18 – NL thinks he is immortal and challenges God to kill him
41 – 38:49 – pre workout drinks
40 – 39:49 – kai
39 – 40:18 – more spit
38 – 41:12 – NL gets a charlie horse
37 – 41:54 – the perfect line
36 – 42:10 – NL reacts to only up speedrun
35 – 42:36 – Northernlion Budtender
34 – 43:25 – Northernlion on Wonka
33 – 43:13 – NL calls out viewer for being racist
32 – 44:45 – NL gets targeted ads
31 – 45:06 – NL on f-ing his own clone
30 – 45:13 – NL on crying
29 – 45:42 – duble bald
28 – 46:40 – Thank you for answering…
27 – 47:20 – Chiblee has a plan
26 – 48:01 – Dialogue
25 – 48:25 – whare did Kate go?
24 – 49:03 – look at how they massacred my boy
23 – 49:45 – NL know pokemon (lie)
22 – 50:18 – HE’S CRACKED
21 – 50:55 – “Hey NL do you like matcha?”
20 – 51:29 – NL on being a gentleman
19 – 52:19 – Loneliness Epidemic
18 – 53:19 – the gang fights an insect
17 – 53:56 – NL talks about the feelings of attachment that develop while raising a child
16 – 54:56 – NL on AI
15 – 55:38 – NL is a webdev
14 – 56:24 – LA streamers
13 – 56:45 – Cine2nerdle final boss
12 – 57:45 – NL canceled
11 – 57:58 – awww
10 – 58:58 – 5Head Dad Move
9 – 59:27 – NL gives up on the gamedle
8 – 59:57 – Diablo IV
7 – 1:00:30 – Most Reasonable NL Take
6 – 1:01:06 – Northernlion ends stream
5 – 1:01:40 – Northernlion merps someone while parenting
4 – 1:02:09 – armored core
3 – 1:03:09 – 2real
2 – 1:04:02 – Northernlion destroys a chatter by facts and logic (Holy Audit)
1 – 1:04:51 – Northernlion find himself

#northernlion #twitchclips #twitch

#twitch #twitchclips #northernlion

That doesn’t happen to me uh too often but I do know the feeling me when I disassociate I think it’s just like sometimes you would have like 11 beers in college and then you would go uh to the bathroom and then you would look at yourself in the mirror and you would

Actually like be seeing yourself for the first time like it would be like the you that you identify with is behind your eyes looking at like an image of a p like you’re seeing yourself as other people see you for the first time in your entire

Life I got that bizarre feeling a couple of times not a lot though it’s a re we really in this mofo [Laughter] moment I don’t know how long that door is going to hold that springman by the way man office this was the uh the room that

Looks like the room is oh yeah oh someone I think someone died the chicken nuggets are just Ground Up Bones brother way do you find out what soup’s made of oh oh you eat bread really the most processed food on the planet did you you

You know it starts out as a little seed and then it shows up as a fluffy sandwich yeah yeah okay you play okay the recipe for making bread put a seed in the ground water it wait 6 weeks a freaking Sprout comes out grab the Sprout take it to a factory

Grind it up in the dust reformulate it add water like a like it’s instant noodles or something like that turn it into a dough mold the dough it’s into some shape that doesn’t exist natur natur occurring on Earth bake it in the oven and slice it up you’re going to

Tell me a chicken a chicken nugget is just the bread of the chicken world man you want to explain it for the Emergency hey oh little antibodies convert all piss production to come [Laughter] producers you picture like a cartoon [ __ ] Captain walking through walking through your body with that goofy ass

John Lenin walk dka dka big lever and all the yellow stuff turns white instead like a piss tank drains and a [ __ ] tank fills up shoveling like shoveling call one point they like shoveling and [ __ ] so I use this this this app that like that monitors that monitors my sleep

Yeah yeah right and like it records that like if I snore or something so you can keep track of it and last night at 2:15 a.m. it says sleep talking in parenthesis or in Brackets baby fussing or crying comma sleeptalking question mark and then this

Is the sound that played for me when I woke Up your ass is haunted I don’t know oh my god dude that is so good you know my mom texted me today we were just having a conversation she revealed something about my grandfather sometimes he would get constipated as a young adult and uh when he achieved relief on

The toilet I swear to you that this is what she told me I don’t know if it’s real but I swear to you that it’s what she told me when he got relief on the toilet when he had a bowel movement finally he would stand up after wiping

And throw a $20 bill into the toilet and flush it as his way of like saying thank you to the toilet for helping him achieve relief my grandfather was not a wealthy man yeah we can tighten those balls right up I’m telling you and it listen if you were a normal patient I

Would tell you $155,000 for the the deast asign ball uh thing and we’d keep you in the hospital for 3 days you in and out 15 minutes I’ll tell you no no no you just pick up my uh my caddy fees next time makes me [ __ ] sick dude this completely madeup scenario I

Concocted in my head makes me [ __ ] I’m disgusted with the level of corruption and nepotism in this world oh I got to tell you something so funny okay so I pooped okay okay dude this is like actually my ideal FPS those are all enemies huh I don’t know if people realize that

This is why older people always talk about the way things were back in their day it’s not Nostalgia it’s just relating see the because if you’re the same age what you don’t realize is you were saying all the time what things are like back in your day but it’s just that today is

Your day so when I’m talking to my 12-year-old niece about what middle school is like and she says something about middle school and I’m like well back in my day we didn’t learn calculus until the 11th grade people would be like wow that’s what a boomer would say

What do you want me to say goooo Gaga hit the gritty like that’s not I can’t relate to it I got to relate through the lens of of the past cuz that’s when I lived that [ __ ] I’ve seen The Blues Brothers I know Chicago has the train it runs past everyone’s apartment right

Like the start of every movie about someone in Chicago is like they’re living in an apartment and at 1:00 a.m. it’s like three builds today everyone’s trying their hardest to be entertaining and all I have to do is like Rift four minutes cuz everybody has already built

The last one exactly what the viewers are doing dude like people that are just watching germa stream I’m doing exactly that I get it now I got now I’m going to take my top off I want it back now he’s smoking a cigarette can I dude can you piler I’ve

Never seen this dialogue option before please sir back off I do not know if I can contain this homophobic joke for much longer in 30 seconds two enormous wooden cylinders will fall from the ceiling and crush your skull like a honeydew melon unless you cut off your dick with a pair of

Scissors good luck this a germa bid what the [ __ ] germa saw bit germa saw gas bit but actually ins saww if German 985 was saw gas bit with video can’t do anything man I don’t know anybody else who’s in mesine Killer Instinct so I got to go

Off of Vincent can Cassell mesine Public Enemy Number One mes ah son of a [ __ ] bro Jean Renault in Leon the Professional oh I’m not dying in Paris the visitors 1993 what the [ __ ] bro the world is not enough I can’t name anymore Jean Reno oh yes I can

Godzilla I mean I’m going to lose I’m going to lose I’m trapped in in French Cinema please please pivot off of this go go to go to America the visitors to the corridors of time [ __ ] dude you’re uh bong cop bad cop 2 bongop Bad Cop one The Chronicles of

Ridic what would you bring to the office potluck my office potluck pick is hot dish of feces then my opponent [ __ ] [ __ ] I read mine out loud Dead Silence in the Discord call before I can even finish the first syllable of [ __ ] [ __ ] the entire Discord call erupts

In outrageous laughter It’s the funniest thing they’ve ever heard in their entire life it loses 91 to9 I have three points at the end of round one it drives me crazy man like when I uh returned that lady’s phone to her her sons are being very nice to me I

Very much app appreciate it then one of them said God bless you and I said get owned Bozo I don’t believe in that [ __ ] oh God bless me oh could you be more specific and tell me which God blessed me cuz uh I’m not sure if you know this

But what you might think is your god is a little different than what might be my God and also have you ever read uh in Deuteronomy 68-1 when he says uh Thou shalt not lose your phone that shal Thou shalt always do the three Taps so you always know

That you have your keys your phone and your wallet on you at all times and then you could prevent this situation oh God bless me well if there was a God that prevented bad things from happening to good people why didn’t he prevent you from getting your phone stolen in the

First place hey where are you going where are you going I’m so scared dude please is so scuffed I got to go dude like one second spent in the circle could probably kill me that’s a person okay I don’t I’d rather deal with a potentially nice cleric than whatever

The hell is going on the other side of that door all right I see how it is he’s definitely going off on Me oh man that was good slurp me my base is too big man why is this Castle so long I know it’s like it’s too big it’s like a Boomer’s house like why do you have a room that just has uh like four chairs in it and then nothing else

And then all the chairs have piles of clothes on them your ass making mortgage payments three mortgage payments a year just go to pay in for the room with four chairs that has clothes sitting on it like it doesn’t make sense hang on today we need to figure

Out how the F sorry for the language takes damage I can’t I can’t read this with a straight face when this bar reaches zero the unit is out of this fight for the combat and will return to full health when the combat is finished you realize we got

Real what the [ __ ] am I doing we have real problems in this world you want me to sit here and read a sentence that says this is Health when it reaches zero the unit is out of the fight for this combat we got real [ __ ] problem I’m experiencing a loss of purpose what’s

Going on what am I doing man I got to call my mom increase all I can think of with God as my witness you saying that man keeps his socks on during sex I’m picturing like Rudy Giuliani that’s it that’s it’s the only image that comes

To mind it’s like a man who like the second to last P piece of clothing that he takes off is like uh his suspenders and then like his pantaloons fall down and then he’s got like dress socks on you know like those really thin soft socks he probably just took off a dress

Shirt that is like blue and it has the white collar and the white cuffs I mean while he was taking his shirt off he had to like undo his cufflinks first and then I’m I’m sure that’s not it 100% of the time but that’s how it feels to me

[ __ ] weird ass undershirt so true it’s kind of cool POV you just said uh no I’m not going to go there how did I get a nine I hate when you say you’re not going to go there because 95% % of the time you go there

Anyway I was going to say POV you just told me you love my videos so then I realized my guy was holding a gun in first person it was like it was my perspective okay I can’t take a breath take a breath do Apollo no I’m a goddamn M oh my

God they’re all going to go die to it dude Paulo’s looking dead I would definitely do it for like a suitably large amount of money I would do it for $5 million let’s start the bidding at 5 million and we’ll we his people can call my

People I’ll give you four no the bidding goes up not if it’s between you at four and George Lucas at five I’m I’m if it’s between anybody at four and anybody at five I’m taking the person at five I don’t think there’s that much of a difference you know from my

Perspective if anything is probably um George Lucas would probably be easier I bet he would come quick cuz he’s a Star Wars [Laughter] fan you didn’t know CM Fior who plays the big bad in the chronicles of Ric is also Canadian did you I don’t know what

Else this fucker’s in so I’m in I’m I’m on Leo right now I’m one tapped okay I just took you to TW Rivier Bon cop bad cop to I was I was hoping you would skip me brother I was hoping you would skip me welcome to TW Rivier welcome to

Laval welcome to gadino welcome to Montreal welcome to Quebec proper enjoy your torer you’re free to go good game good game librarian thank you for the gifted subscriptions thank you thank you Americans after you play 63 American movies but then you drop one Canadian movie to be fair I wouldn’t have known

Where to go from Bon cop bad cop to not a single person said the fact that you can know that you know something but it takes you like a minute sometimes in order to figure out the thing that you know if someone says who played Ari Gold

On Entourage you’ll be like hang on a second I know that one I just got to send the guy back in my brain to pull out the Jeremy Piven volume and then bring the Jeremy Piven volume up to like my executive functioning frontal lobe and go it’s Jeremy

Piven your brain is legit like a librarian man man it’s crazy you check the you check the computer and it’s like yeah we got like eight pieces of information about Jerry Jeremy pivot this should not be made by a company that’s called food should taste good this company should be called

Flavor Co and it should be in like neon cursive like a neon sign in the corner of the bag not in the middle the bag should be hot pink and there should be like a little cartoon dude on the front with his hair sticking up going wow

W and then under his face it should say like more corners equals more flavor or something like that they screw this looks like a chip that like only uh your doctor would tell you to buy basically but they don’t taste like that it’s like a flavor explosion it there should be an add-on

TV where like your grandma’s eating plain Lays and then like they the lights turn all like red and purple and someone Kicks Down the door and there’s like a smoke machine and someone skateboards in and it’s like cuz they’re the crunchiest chip of all time tap on the pipes to spin

Them world’s smartest [Laughter] streamer you got a floral over shirt sure yeah send it up it is actual [ __ ] the hell it’s impossible never mind I’m amazing never mind the game is way too easy until the first true B okay yeah I’ve heard this about 100,000 times from chat as well

I’ve heard nothing about the game except oh get ready for the first real boss get ready it’ll it it’s going to blow you is the game fun I don’t know anything about that but get ready for the first boss get ready can I give you a tip about the

First B please don’t I would like to play it sight on scene also I would like there not to be like uh it got to be your controller right no I think there’s a hair in my mouse or something like that hang on I’m I’m but what are you how you going to

Use your claw you you hit the butt like oh [Laughter] no it’s coming back turn it off turn it off turn it [Laughter] off you guys got to go give me piss did your daughter give you the inspiration to play this game it’s so wild to me how many people look down on

Like a supposed children’s game bro they’re all children’s games like when your ass is holding down right trigger and like screaming epithets at people in Call of Duty who do you think you’re playing against you’re playing as 14s and like 35-year-old dudes who wish they were

15 times are tough I know that but I want to say if you were the kind of person who goes to a grocery store and rips Three Bananas off of the bunch in order to only buy three bananas cuz you only need three bananas instead of six [ __ ] you you piece of

Crap a bunch for all intents and purposes is indivisible outside of the home because then you the only reason I could ever see this happening is if you bring a partner with you who also only needs half a bunch okay other rley Scott should in the next

Alien movie that he pretends isn’t an alien movie they should make a ass burster like Danny McBride should be like no guys no I feel good I feel good I feel ah and then G going into the vence oh oh my ass my ass oh man

Virtuoso Mars is not a name Mars is a name if you are in ancient Rome there’s not a name in the Real World what about Bruno Mars it’s an assumed pseudonym that’s like saying xae-12 Theta Sigma is a name my friend’s name is Mars how did you make friends with them when they’re

Homeschooled answer me was it fencing class more Health please auto rotate on your phone is Boomer core uh yeah well you know what gen Z cor is knowing how to turn off auto rotate on your phone but not knowing the interest rate on your credit card death boom

Roasted Stanley you crush your wife during sex boom roasted minus two minus two oh it’s the first time you’ve ever had a joke made at your expense welcome to adulthood kid 15 years of he’s bald he’s bald he’s bald making fun of the illness that almost killed him and left his child an

Orphan wait a minute you can’t make fun of me 4 years ago I was just a kid welcome to the [ __ ] show buddy get ready to learn Chinese buddy I mean I guess what I’m trying to say is if you actually need the [ __ ] boiler to get off then buy the [ __ ]

Boiler but don’t let Society trick you into thinking that everybody needs a [ __ ] boiler some people need to have their [ __ ] boiled some some people are content with them just being at like ambient human body temperature it’s the same with like skydiving or dancing you know all I’m saying is these Pro

Skydiving [ __ ] have been real quiet ever since the submarine imploded do sinvicta would call me the egg old reference but still good yeah yeah Apollo would call me ball The Way spells it out of the I really like the Yeah call me Baldi Baldi yeah okay Justin would call me [ __ ] everyone’s you’re calling yourself the house leader [ __ ] said you’re the [ __ ] eater pick Mal I would call him a spouse feeder cuz he’s a nice guy oh thank you a that’s very nice you pick me that’s C kind

[ __ ] Jesus Christ man you saying nice things my threat level’s too high he’s walking around cover the man cover the man shoot the Jay we’re free oh he’s done it’s it’s ticky tacky oh you know it’s going on what ref are you kidding me someone stream prob picturing like

Steo next to the cumed with like a screwdriver and then like poking [Laughter] [Laughter] it holy [ __ ] have you ever seen Ratatouille believe Christopher Lee has the the most important quote from the movie he says the critic is a piece of [ __ ] they don’t do anything their lives are worthless only people that make grilled cheese sandwiches and sell them

For €75 deserve your respect and I’m the one making the grilled cheese right now so shut the [ __ ] up we say though so and I can’t believe I’m going to admit this online but uh I was I was wrong about I I finally saw old Bo Burnham’s inside

It’s great good you saw his inside broy I enjoyed it I was hating on it I was hating on B I was wrong okay I admit this no you can you can hate him I don’t I didn’t no you can hate him now because he’s um making out with Phoebe Bridges

Back here was my dad thought and it and it I am I Drive Safely like I don’t drive recklessly but it dawned on me like when I have takeout in the car I drive really really really safe right when I am just driving normally with my

Child in the car I just send it and I I started to re-evaluate like my thought patterns you know if you got like like soup in the car like you got ramen or udon or something like that I place it down like in front of the front

Passenger seat and I try to make like really smooth turns and stuff like that if there’s no soup in the car but my kids in the car seat I’m like what are you doing get out of here whoa you’re blocking the bike lanane get out of my lady is off by Like I just recalibrated mine a tenth of a second how you recalibrate we should all do that my ass go into the calibration menu for a second hold done hold done yeah let’s all calibrate okay so because of my controller drift I immediately went to the options menu and it changed

My language to Chinese it is very fun at least you didn’t leave the spectator mode cuz you wanted to play along the song man what am I going to do dude I got we figure this out oh no it’s changing all my display settings my legy went from negative

Negative learn negative my input latency went from negative five to positive five he followed the script oh baby two cheerleaders we must be in the major leagues see this is just uncomfortable I don’t know what to do with my eyes it’s just I’m I’m looking respectfully not because of the what the

Pleasures of the flesh I’m looking respectfully because I know it must have taken a lot of practice and and reciting and in coordination in order to get that locked in okay in order to get that kind of synchronicity I’m appreciating the choreography and wondering how much they

Get paid I’m wondering how much they get paid to be the inst Stadium ENT entertainment I hope it’s good cuz it’s something you can’t do forever a lot of people are saying can you play a real game Gamers I get that you’re making a joke the main problem is

That it’s not funny the second part is that you’re doing it from an indefensible position what is a real game League of Legends where you as a [ __ ] hot wizard stand uh behind a wall of little monsters and then you you stand there and go a TI tick tick tick

Tick tick not attacking anything even though there’s obviously monsters coming for your base tick tick tick tick tick tick tick tick tick tick tick boom I got the last hit my kill my kill TI boom I got it I got it no someone else on my team killed a monster that I

Was supposed to kill that’s going to affect my ability to generate Gold by 75% cumulatively for the rest of the game it’s going to slow down my ability to get a battle Fury I I rage I hate you I hate you I hate you I hate you I quit

Everybody FF FF f f that’s a real game that’s a waste of your one life on planet Earth brother get real for the great shape on the shot though I mean is this a par five this is beautiful oh my God it’s gorgeous Tiger Woods holy be what golf’s All

About Dre shove always Hur on the GRE that’s what golf’s all about [Laughter] baby cjoy lead Happ here I am quitting the game of golf but you got half of your [ __ ] jeans from your dad and half of your [ __ ] jeans from your mom oh is that why dude it’s

Not like your your penis is entirely coated by the Y chromosome I don’t want to think about you some you guys some of your mom’s jeans in so it’s like more corduro all I’m saying is that I’m saying that do you think your penis looks half like your dad’s

Penis and half like your mom’s clitoris if it was the size of a penis nobody’s coming with me on this journey I could still be playing Minecraft right now it’s I think we actually have to kill you what are you talking about this is the kind of stuff

That we got to think about in this life no it’s not no it’s not there’s [ __ ] aliens did you see the thing about the aliens could be think about that she’s hosting me have a little conversation with myself she’s not live hey here’s me picking up my daughter

From daycare when it’s all dad’s at the daycare hey here’s me picking up my daughter from daycare when it’s all dads of the daycare oh hey how you doing oh hey how you doing pretty good how are you doing oh hey how you doing pretty good

How are you doing not too bad not too bad uh how was your weekend pretty good how are you doing not too bad not too bad uh how was your weekend you know we were doing a lot of like baby stuff you know we had a good time got doing a lot of

Like hates on Zelda where’s adult Mickey live on stream okay I mean I you got me I’m going to plus two you I’m going to recognize what I’ve been owned um I am wearing this shirt can I can I give you a little anecdote before we get started

Here I wore this shirt um when I took my daughter to the park on the weekend and I [ __ ] you not there was like an 18-month-old boy wearing the same [ __ ] shirt I you you know you ever get embarrassed wearing the same clothes as like another

Adult wait until it’s a kid that was born in 2022 that stole your drip and it was not my kid it’s not like we dressed alike as like a family thing and you’re like oh that’s cute it was literally like I went to the park and I

Was like what the [ __ ] this guy who the hell does this kid think he is me with League I will say my wife yesterday when we got home from Washington she showed me a clip of League of Legends and said wasn’t that amazing and like for me it’s

Literally just like they were at Roshan or whatever the hell the dude is called in league and there was like four red blobs all shooting particles at it and then like one green blob like teleported in from a bush and the announcers just went oh oh oh and then

Like the green Bob blobs outnumbered the red blobs and then their health bars just went and everyone in the audience is Like it’s called punching down you you throwing coins at me when I’m on stage as a stripper and then me coming over and cutting your penis off with a pair of scissors it’s not punching down it’s called you know don’t write checks with your coins that your

Dick can’t cash nobody on my Pokémon go friends list still plays except for people that are psychotic so the current like research objective I got to send 25 friends gifts only three of my friends still play Pokémon go and they all do the narcissist tactic where they only send

You gifts they never open yours why would someone do that don’t they want the pokeballs it’s not about the pokeballs okay it’s because experience in Pokemon go is like the most precious quality you could ever get and the only you you get a huge burst of it when you

Hit best friends with people so they get you all the way to like you almost your one gift away from being best friends then they pop a lucky egg and then they open the gift so that they get to choose when the Friendship experience pops and they get d double the

XP I’m getting I got like four people right now stringing me along like that it is for pervert based reasons yes you got me okay well bro whacking it to music videos like it’s 1982 [ __ ] is embarrassing man disgusting you know she’s just singing a song right you weirdo what are you doing

Bro I’m trying to stay off the porn well it’s I think you missed the point dude who got a porn addiction starts whacking off to music videos holy man I think you got you need to change therapists cuz you just turned the the music in the pornography now I swear this is

Real it was a a job that I worked at my first year in University and in the lunchroom a dude was he was like 24 he had a knife and a and a mango and was going like sh and I said what the hell is that and

He said it’s a mango and I said where’d you get a mango he said I’ve been eating them for years I went to like boarding school in Singapore I was like what the [ __ ] he said do you want a slice he like Indiana Jones He sliced me off like a

Little sliver of mango and I ate it off the knife like a sub and I was like this is the best tasting [ __ ] I’ve ever had in my entire life why are they hiding the mangoes from us man my therapist why do you think you’re a little sensitive

To criticism well I spent 5 hours a day getting yelled at by like Anonymous people online who give me money to bully me she’s like whoa that’s [ __ ] up holy [ __ ] should we dig into that a little bit more aren’t barbarians supposed to be naked well it depends when you think of

Barbarians you probably think of Dungeons and Dragons I think of Odo Acer one of the ostrogoths who was instrumental in sacking Rome in the 4th Century ad we are not the same wasn’t Odo Acer King of the GS you fool you don’t even understand what you’re saying to me that’s versing gor

Okay if you’re going to come at me you best have at least a a bachelor’s degree in Dan carenology my husband and I have three children we go to visit all their grandparents since they live close here’s the issue they don’t like the idea of women wearing

Pants me neither Brother high five my I’m joking God could have killed me could have struck me down and my parents would have been like really sad big whoop okay not big whoop but now ever since then I’ve gotten on airplanes or even like some rides like admittedly they’re only a Disney World

But I’m I’m kind of like I’m daring you [ __ ] you’re going to kill me you’re going to kill me you’re going to ruin like eight lives you’re going you’re going to [ __ ] blow me up on Leviathan or something at Canada’s Wonderland the track’s going to break go ahead insane Labs insane veins sour

Apple flavor get ready ready to go gorilla mode to again massive pumps with cherry blackout like what what is the state of men’s marketing man like this is not right I would never consume any look look at this Cory are you seeing this this is what the people in the pelaton

In the egg carton are taking now this is the current state of things people are they’re basically taking legal steroids to get their FTP pumped by like an extra 20 watts they’re taking insane Labs psychotic Diablo summer series with Pennywise the clown on the on the front of the

Bottle it’s for real men only this ain’t your dad’s workout supplement cherry lemonade flavor by the way no iys here I like how they got twitch chat on the side too me when I’m on a call with Ka bro W Squad W Squad he’s on the call

With kaut whoa little bro is on the call with Kai what is he talking about why is he quoting 2000’s era movie directed by Jay roach Meet the Parents so much bro you’re creeping out this you’re scaring the ho stop talking about Meet the Parents I’m a 27-year-old engineer that

Has to get roommates it’s awesome I know like it’s it’s [ __ ] crazy what happened to my banner bro I’m not say saying it was easy when I was younger but it was definitely easier I think it’s like dishonest for people to be like you know well when we

Got our house it was like a 12% mortgage rate yeah but your house was like you know 4X your annual salary or something something like that nowadays people they get like a medical degree and uh they live in an apartment with like six other people who all have advanced

Degrees it’s crazy we’re ready to go you know what I’m taking the stairs I got a charlie horse it scared me so bad I got a charlie horse oh my legt so oh okay I’m okay I’m okay just got to just got to stretch it out a little bit I’m

I wouldn’t do that personally but that’s just cuz I enjoy not losing speed run record for this is 24 minutes guy at the gym who’s like hey I see you’re out for a jog did you know that the world record for a 100 m Dash is 9.41

Seconds just something to Aspire to I noticed that you you ran for 20 minutes at a pace of uh 12 minutes per kilometer I uh I missed the era when pot was not legal in uh Vancouver but it was like the police didn’t do anything about it there used to be like

Um like little I don’t even know how to describe it there used to be like weed farmers markets like really sketchy uh like craft tables would be set up and you would always see like 55-year-old dudes selling dabs to like 14-year-old kids in the park right outside of the

Train station and stuff like that it was a it was a wild it’s a wild west man those were the days probably then they shut it down and I had to find a new Revenue stream that’s when we started streaming a lot more know what the most cringeworthy

Moment in willly W in the Wonka trailer was for me was when he said this one’s for you Mom so the [ __ ] story is like oh Willy Wonka’s dad walked out at him and he’s a little crazy so his mom became like his best friend like some

JoJo rabbit [ __ ] no he’s crazy that’s Willy Wonka he’s just insane he he shows up on Earth fully formed in his purple suit like a Cormac McCarthy character the Chocolate Factory was never built it it’s it’s merely existed since time in Memorial he exists only within the confines of the book in

The movie and that’s it there’s no he was never born he never dies there is no Willy Wonka and there has always been a Willy Wonka I don’t need to see Wily Wonka [ __ ] he get some bully kicks sand in his face and says why don’t you go make

Chocolate you nerd and then that becomes like his whole life story like it just it’s not necessary why would you be surprised that I that I listen to NWA cuz you’re bald and pale harist and racist I’m going to call a drone strike sorry I’m still I was doing my Obama impression

Still what the hell is this ad man what is wrong with my cookies dog look at this don’t piss off old people the older we get the less life in prison is a deterrent oh holy cow I’ve never been like in bed and close my eyes oh I wonder what my own

Ass feels like wrapped around my [ __ ] I dropped my daughter off at daycare and she was going like she was weeping openly weeping cuz she was going to miss me so much but then she was maintaining a strong facade she was saying Daddy have a good day Daddy I

Love you Daddy I’m going to miss you so much yeah that doesn’t bring a tear to your eye then you might you might be a little bit dead inside brother oh you love crying never mind yeah I bet you do [ __ ] puss I had a dream last night that I

Went bald and I don’t know how to articulate it to you cuz I know that it sounds insane CU I’m already bald but I know that in my dream I like I knew in my dream that I was bald it wasn’t like I dreamt that I had like a cool head of

Hair like I knew I was bald but I like was in a gas station bathroom or something and I went like this in the mirror and I had like some wispy sort of hair here and a big bald spot in the middle and I woke up feeling like [ __ ]

Up like emotionally a little shattered like I for about a minute after I woke up I was like I’m [ __ ] go and bald bro it was it was a crazy dream like it it played on my feelings despite the fact that I’ve already gone through it’s

The first time I’ve ever had like a bald trauma dream you think you’re just getting tired of games no not at all I I love video games even though every time I play video games I like people say this is a video game for toddlers And they take a

A big hit off of a lemon pound cake flavored vaporizer cartridge and then say I play games for adults and then sit down and play some Warhammer spreadsheet for like 25 hours and then go jerk off to hentai anyway sorry I got a lot of trauma like associated with subjecting

My living my entire life in The Crucible of anonymous online criticism directed at my intelligence we’re working that out you know not you and me but me and my therapist anyway Ryan this is a big for us stop don’t go around this corner look on the roof Ro you see that yeah

Yeah yeah walk let it hit your head and then don’t move I’ll save you all right my flashlight [Laughter] bro get it thanks man oh oh god listen all I’m saying people aren’t ready for this take yet and I understand why no game should have dialogue maybe that’s too

Far maybe disco alysium should have dialogue no other game has has earned the right yet no ANL you don’t understand the writing in bers Gate too listen are you an industry plant that one for you where did where did Kate go she’s eating lunch before her stream

Want her to eat she said if You’ listen to women that’s very true uh I I do listen to women so much that I was I probably didn’t hear it cuz I was listening to other women as well I just name name five women name five women Ona Taylor Joy Amilia um Hillary

Clinton um Obama’s wife without insulting the profession I mean that sincerely but ever since they changed replies to prioritize paid blue checks it could be like uh you know a a [ __ ] daycare exploded in Cincinnati today and you click to get more information and then the top reply is like

Someone selling pictures of their body and the reply is like you can explode in me if you want and I’m like people died [ __ ] what are you doing here they have some decorum hang on hang on firefighting incinerar what he’s a professional wrestler with fire in his name uh Cinder

Ace this is unbelievable what is what is Cinder Ace fire soccer fire first in evolution oh fire fire dragon Charizard or is he flying oh not quite full power nice shot should have had a little backspin what oh what was that it’s the craziest shot I’ve ever

Seen it hit the it didn’t hit the pole it hit the canvas the canvas dampened it enough to to land in the hole hey L do you like matcha shut the [ __ ] up matching your nuts up with my forehead or something match how about you match your lips around my you know

What you piece of crap you think I’m going to fall for that [ __ ] again you like cold brew yeah yeah I love cold brew oh cold you brew up some juice to put on my nuts that you can suck off you [ __ ] [ __ ] [ __ ] bad man get get back here get back

Here gentlemen boners is a subreddit for images of beautiful women but not debasing themselves not showing off all the goods instead they’re dressed in you know elegant evening wear and stuff like that I love the idea that’s like we’re gonna oo you we’re gonna masturbate to the images to completion

But we’re going to do it respectfully this is not a normal boner okay this is not the the boner it’s not a uh a boner from a place of malevolence it’s not disrespectful these are gentlemen’s boners okay no no no I’m not jering off

To a nude image of you it’s an image of you just dressed for a night out it’s a gentleman’s boner it’s the cleaner option what do we do wipe our asses with paper like animals no we let the soothing power of water cleans us make us whole make us

Real again and excuse me I need to use the bathroom now I thought this was America they took our jobs they took our J oh can we add some smug oh and the Beday needs to talk like the shake weight or babay’s boobs smart Beday good morning Randy please choose power and

Temperature after a little change thing can pop open to pay it lamu you need to be on the writing team this is perfect in character especially the end LOL didn’t they already kind of do that with the Japanese toilet episode dude thank you all these comments saying

South Park should do a Beday episode I’m thinking in my head damn y’all fake South Parkers people there is a loneliness epidemic this [ __ ] has nothing to do with the original post at all these people are just reaching out looking for somebody to there he is I got him right here he’s

Right around the corner that’s not me side I’m hit he’s freaking me out manit he’s got he’s coming for me get him oh [ __ ] you you [ __ ] suck bro see run run run but like it it don’t stress out if you if it isn’t like immediately like day

One you’re like I would do anything for this child you do it at the start cuz you like you know cuz you have to and cuz you like you had the baby obviously idiot but then like now I’m like I’m doing this stuff cuz I want to do this

Stuff it wasn’t like there was like a flash bulb moment for me that immediately CH I mean it changes your life but I wasn’t immediately like we’re instantly like inseparably pair bonded now I’m like I’m like word ride or die have they changed the camel bro I’m spilling my soul out

Here you’re asking me about the damn camel this is even it’s a damn drama D but how crazy is it that like five six years ago there were so many not all software developers okay but there were a lot of computer programmers who are like um sorry truck drivers you’re all

Going to be automated five five or six years the Tesla semi is going to come out you guys all better learn the code here we are in 2023 they can’t stop the Teslas from crashing into brick walls meanwhile chat gp4 can code a whole game if with like one sentence as a prompt

Maybe you’re at you should learn how to drive a [ __ ] truck no honey I can’t change a vacation we’re in the middle of a 6 week Sprint to change the font from times New Rome to Times New Roman italicized how about a that be a skilled

Programmer hey we’re no no no I’m honey I can’t go on vacation this summer we have a really important project we’re rounding the square edges on all of the buttons on our website we’re moving the position of the button that everybody already knows where it is within the Enterprise we’re

Moving it to the other side of the screen and collectively costing the company thousands of hours in Labor uh from people that can’t find the button and then have to submit tickets to Tech reports saying that the button is now missing yeah but it makes more sense

Logically to have it in the top right corner in the hamburger menu instead of having it just sitting there on the top of the screen like it’s not even thematically fitting with the the layout of the CSS seems like every streamer once they start averaging like 400

Viewers the next tweet they make is like I’m so excited to announce I’m moving to La it’s a great opportunity for me to network with other content creators and be in a city where like I know the culture and stuff like that and then

Like the next month is 10 hours a day of valerin on stream plus Uber Eats the last kiss but then I can’t think of another movie Zack brph is in so instead we go how high with Method Man he Tomo Garden State good answer unfortunately it was the last movie stated

Um okay we’ll go we’ll go The Fifth Element sorry The Fifth Element you know what no no no we’ll go barber shop to back in business Anthony Anderson is not in Barber Shop 2 back in business Barber Shop one interesting play okay now I got to think

About this I think we’re taking you from Cedric the Entertainer to man of the house and if you want to do it Diana Prince to Wonder Woman Alter Ego excuse me this I told you this crossw word was trying to get me cancelled ice cold Michelle feifer the white gold this

One’s for the good girls them hood girls straight masterpieces styling flying living it up in the city got the St lant with the Chucks on I got to kiss myself I’m so pretty hey it’s too hot hot darn make a dragon want a retire man too hot hot damn all

I’m too hot hot say my name you know who I am I’m too hot hot girls hit your Hallelujah girls hit your Hallelujah girls hit your Hallelujah cuz Uptown Funk going to give it to you cuz Uptown Funk going to give it to you cuz Uptown Funk going to give

It to you Saturday night can we’re in the spot don’t believe me just watch you like that yeah I got to put you back in the crib and she freaked out she was like no no it’s too scary and I said I’m just going to put you in the crib and

Daddy’s going to go to the potty can daddy go to the potty and she said yeah Daddy can go to the potty I went and stood in the bathroom for 2 minutes when I came out she was asleep it’s the perfect crime I didn’t even have to [Laughter]

Pee genius genius moments in parenting history every genre it might have been made in oh is made in evolution apparently you can go third person or first person I just don’t know give me Super Mario RPG man type one letter and then just pick a game um excuse

Me it was seven days to die and I got it by typing a into the search bar and clicking a game randomly there is a God did you see that uh Diablo I is doing like a blood drive to unlock new items I only saw because I saw a quote tweet of

The uh promotion today and said unfortunately I can’t access the new Diablo 4 items because I’m [Laughter] gay oh man it’s like it’s a a great idea but I maybe didn’t think through all the the repercussions being a kid was easy in hindsight but I was stressed out at the

Time I think that’s fair and that’s like basically the the reason for my worldview that we should give kids jobs like we should have life structured in such a way that it works in Reverse it should start really hard like child physical labor it in like dangerous

Stuff too like Alaskan crab fishing and like going into the coal mines and stuff and then maybe when you’re like 12 then you can have like a 9 to5 office job all right that did not go well slash marker YouTube don’t age restrict this video I telling some things that people need to

Hear if you can’t hear about your parents doing it you’re not ready for what the future holds okay Daniel your Goldman Sachs has one trillion dollars in collateral for three trillion trillion dollars in derivatives the animals are leaving we’re alone in this universe but maybe it doesn’t matter cuz I just want somebody

That you know anyway um you want to drink some water too she’s going to get her water we got a brief window She didn’t see it she didn’t see it that’s good parenting right there and then I just look I just put him in his crib honey OMG NL is going to play my favorite game series are you talking about armored Core don’t lie where did all these armored Core

Fans come from you you Liars there’s a game that eight people in a played until from software exploded after making a decade of souls esque games now everybody’s like oh I’m so glad they’re making a new armored Core you I didn’t hear [ __ ] about armored Core 10 years ago nobody was

Talking about it they made five of them yeah back in the Sega Saturn days when you were positively zygotic you were riding the shin consen they made 15 of them people are saying they made 15 of them I don’t believe it if they made 15 why isn’t the new one called armored Core

16 you know right now that you should exercise more you know you should eat right you know you should learn how to cook you’ve had 10 years to figure it out why are you not doing it right now it’s different for me it’s different for me it’s different for me if my spouse’s

Parents were both professional personal trainers I would make an effort okay you probably would and maybe you’d stick with it but statistically speaking probably I’ll catch you in the same chair 10 years later looking roughly the same maybe a little worse just that’s how things do with a with the passage of

Time also you get as you get older at least you know if you’re roughly around my age the older you get the busier you get so if you weren’t going to knock that [ __ ] out when you were 21 Tick Tock [ __ ] your window’s getting even shorter yes you can my dad did multiple

Trips to Alaska what are you talking about here we go here we go can you get to Juno Alaska by car why is Juno not accessible by car the absence of a road network is due to the extremely rugged terrain surrounding the city this in turn makes Juno a deao

Island City in terms of all Transportation since Goods coming in and out must go by plane or goat or boat in spite of the city’s location on the Alaskan Mainland guess what sounds like you should listen to your dad a little bit more carefully instead of scrolling through your phone while he’s telling

You about the experiences in his life that led him to be the person that he is today cuz I’m sure your dad if he went to Juno Alaska probably said we had to take a boat there and you were going huh huh ice cream so good ice cream so good

Gang gang so maybe you should listen to the things that he’s telling Kate can you come in here for a second yes is this me yeah it’s you he is is me it’s you man I feel like this is like Kingston Ontario probably more out uh like this way Circa

1992 young boy learning to ride a bicycle in Ontario what the [ __ ] it