Vrouw & Parkinson 31 mei 2024 – Hier is jouw livestream ticket voor het grootste evenement in 2024 over Vrouw & Parkinson. Dit evenement staat dit jaar volledig in het teken van geluk. Er komen veel goede sprekers langs op dit evenement. Zo is bijvoorbeeld de bekende geluksexpert Guy van Liemt aanwezig om te spreken over geluk en zal ook klinisch neuropschycholoog Annelien Duits spreken. Jij kunt NU meekijken via de livestream.
Guy van Liemt komt ons boeiend vertellen over geluk. Guy is geluksexpert, bedrijfseconoom (P&G & Unilever) en marketing expert. Hij reist door heel Nederland om over zijn missie te vertellen. Hij wil mensen inspireren hoe je anders zou kunnen omgaan met de dingen die je overkomen in je leven. Wat kan geluk voor jou betekenen. Iedereen moet daarin zijn eigen weg uitstippelen. Deze ochtend hebben we de kans om met DE geluksexpert van Nederland daarover in gesprek te gaan. Een inspirerende sessie, waar we de kans krijgen meer te horen, hoe we met de dingen die ons overkomen om kunnen gaan en ons gelukkig kunnen voelen. Dus eigenlijk hoe kunnen we positief in het leven blijven staan. Bijgestaan met klinisch neuropsycholoog Annelien Duits en ervaringsdeskundigen Theo van Neerven en Karin Pinckaers Lumey gaan we gezamenlijk dit gesprek aan.
Dit wordt een gesprek waar we naar op zoek zijn. Guy reikt ons inzichten aan hoe we elkaar kunnen inspireren naar positiviteit. Positiviteit kan ons een beter leven geven met hoe we met onze aandoening om kunnen gaan. Wat ontzettend mooi dat Guy ons daarin wilt helpen door zijn kennis over geluk te delen op het vrouw en parkinson event.
[Applause] Gloria Hi yes thank you card for your li he as a special amb Oh yes that has to be said Yes she forgets me again Yes forgets Els again Els is eh Ambassador of W La I will do it again soon but I am also called but not only Els I also have one in America and that is Julio Delgado uh she is also an ambassador uh but yes I am very happy of course that uh Els uh has become my ambassador because I also think she is a great guy and eh with everything she does and eh enormous Thank you for everything she does for eh for me Well yes oh I have one here eh I am also eh there you know I have also become alur which I just think is very special what we have all set up eh and how she does all that thing and then thinks Yes, somewhere in the park there is a piece in which we can pick up a kind of drive if we can pick up I, we will pick it up too, so to speak, or Well take that tide, but I think it is very special, so that’s very beautiful, it’s honored quickly [Music] Oh no, oh, this is great and soon everyone can be there k Oh, that’s beautiful, weep it somewhere Thank you, thank you, somewhere Oh Yes, great, I think it’s a very nice gift Thank you, now let’s go let’s continue with the program, there will never be [Music] oh Eh, do it, yes, we will start with Anneline’s presentation, eh, duit, eh well, let’s listen to it first and if you have any questions, let us go through it. Yes, let’s start Good morning everyone, it’s a pity that I ‘m not physically present with you today because it was really nice to chat informally with a number of people from J and to experience the day together with you in Benom and eh, it looks like a beautiful program and I sincerely hope that I will talk ahead until the weather is a bit favorable so that I don’t leave you completely without it, I would like to take you through the developments that we have in the HB but also in the Maastricht UMC around self-management and eh online programs for loved ones but also for people with Parkinson’s self- balance partner balance has been around for some time. That is a program that was developed by the alz center in Limburg at the time for loved ones of people with early dementia, the Le program actually turned out to be very good for other groups and so on, we have developed collections for loved ones of people with couples’ disease, but also loved ones of people with Huntington’s disease and also people with temporal dementia and in fact program Z is also completely good for people with couples’ disease sometimes it is about programs, er, the program that is made up of modules and the theme is self-management and self-management is a broad theme which of course in itself is actually relevant not only to loved ones but to everyone and therefore also to people with the disease themselves Self-management actually requires a number of skills from us that can help us deal with situations and these are, for example, skills that we know about, what do we find difficult? What are things we can ask for help with. Do we have insight into those matters? with ourselves and information about a number of things, such as the illness of our partner, can also help us to deal better with the illness. Self-management really has to do with self-management. You want to keep control. You are also autonomous and important in that program. is also that we want people to take control here too, it is a blender program And that means that a coach is involved who coaches you, it is not the intention that that coach will solve it for you because that is not the idea of self-management, but someone who thinks along with you, so your own control is important, it is also important that you are in charge of determining the course, of course, that you as a participant determine the course. It is also possible that a coach can help a little more, but that is always at your request, so that blended career It is true online, but there is a coach who thinks along with you and that can be just that little bit extra than, for example, self-help programs that you can also follow on the computer. In this program there are a number of modules I will immediately explain these separately that you go through and in principle there are several modules, but let’s say Let’s choose four that you are working on and where the coach follows you and who can also help you, ultimately you can follow all the modules and you will be able to the program is open to you for a year. You can contact the coach via a chat function, but there is also contact in the beginning and then it is also evaluated. I will show you that in a moment. I just mentioned that there are different collections. around partner and balance where we are now actually the first We have created a version for people with paron themselves and we call it Parkinson in Balance. The program is always structured, eh, for all collections with eh, it starts with an intake interview, so that means that you start getting acquainted. It may also be that you already have a coach and will start the program with that coach. But that first conversation is mainly intended to gain insight into who are you, um, where are the challenges, what is the disease like for you ? What, what, what does the view do for you, um, and where are your personal goals, so based on that intimate conversation you can also check with your coach which modules would best suit your situation, or at least the modules for which you would like some coaching, then you can Let’s say after that intake you start with those modules yourself. There is a manual, but actually the program is fairly easily accessible and is fairly self-explanatory, so you go through four modules yourself and the coach also gives feedback at certain times and of course there is also uh the option to chat with that coach if you have followed those four modules and we calculate approximately 8 to 12 weeks for this, then the coach will conclude with you and this can also be done face to face, so in a personal conversation or possibly in a online meeting So there really is a beginning and an end, which can be very physically personal but also online, but then you really have a conversation at the beginning to see where your questions are, but at the end you also have to look at what I have Well, those goals have also been achieved and I can continue with this, you then have access for another year and it is then up to you whether you go through the other modules, perhaps not immediately, but perhaps at a later time. Well, those modules. What are they? Well, we have different modules and Um I’ll mention them briefly here, I think acceptance is a very important module and I think that ‘s also a nice theme that comes back again today um because that’s of course about um acceptance is difficult but um the disease that is there and Fighting that disease takes a lot of energy and also causes a lot of suffering, on top of the pain, we say that the disease is there, unfortunately it cannot be stopped yet and actually the most important challenge is Don’t try to fight the things that you cannot, er, solve. let the disease be there, but in the meantime focus on the things that you can influence and let those be the things that you find important, right? Happiness is the next theme that will soon be discussed in detail with you. is also a very important factor here. What makes you happy in this case, what do you find valuable? What do you live for, that is where the focus is, that is also where the course lies, so that is what is especially important in that module, so you will also receive some tips and theories, but also tips from fellow sufferers about how you could deal with this, there is also information to gain some depth, the balance and activities module is of course also related to it, so it is important to especially to put the time into the things that you find important and um eh not too much too far, but it is also important that you have a good balance between the things that may be necessary and the things that are allowed, but that you gives time to take sufficient rest and also to follow those rules of life that are of course part of Parton, the medication moments, the eating moments, but also lifestyle, when do you exercise, when do you exercise, what about your diet, what are the moments of relaxation, when do you relax? that is all important to balance that well, so um, these can really be schedules in which, for example, you can organize your working hours, your hobbies, but also your relaxation. It is important that you do this and that also always applies to your loved one. ensures that you also meet your own needs. Sometimes things can no longer be done together, but that does not mean that you can never do it again. If you like exercising, exercising together no longer works out so well, then it can be important that everyone in its own way continues to practice sports at his or her own pace, the communication module mainly focuses on how you interact with the environment, including, for example, How did you share that you have paron? How does your environment respond to your Park zone? How can you get there again? influence at a time when there may not be sufficient understanding, but on the other hand it may also have to do with your own communication and it may sometimes be difficult to communicate in larger groups or to come up with your words and tell your story. to keep up the thread , but also to be able to deliver your message at the right times, so these are all kinds of aspects of communication that are discussed, where you also get tips and fellow sufferers also share their experiences with you and model changes that Set up an extension, you could say, there are all kinds of changes that can be associated with partn, which of course does not always have to apply to you, but it does indicate which things may be appropriate for Parkinson’s, which may then give you also Z what insight from AH is that a Parkinson’s Parkinson’s can stand around you, for example, it can make it more difficult to make choices, it may cause you to postpone things, it may also cause you to procrastinate or procrastinate a bit and Sometimes people are very irritated with himself , but when you know that Parkinson’s can affect you, you may have to be a little less strict on yourself and you know when will Parkinson’s affect me and I certainly want to do something about that, but that you do something about yourself gives you the space to pay attention to that and not be angry and frustrated about it, advice that is all gain within yourself, that is a module in which you mainly consider what are your kwb reasons. Where are your obstacles, but where are they too? your challenge and Where are your strengths Where are your strengths and especially in self-direction and self-management this is also a very important part that you know from you I can fall back on those are precisely the aspects that I find difficult you find it for example, it may be difficult to ask for help, well these are things that can emerge in insight and yourself, insecurities and worries, something we all do and perhaps some and even more than others and yes, what can you possibly do with that? It is of course not can be prevented, but there are ways in which you can dose it or add some in Yes, which can work so that you are less bothered by it social support and relationships, that is also mainly about how how are things going between you and Maintaining your relationship in the area, but also You can ask help from the people in your area, you can also ask help from healthcare providers, so that is also an important part, after all, we also have the module thinking about the future and that is of course more about the vision of the future, but it may also be an important theme at a later date. All these modules, so you can go through them all, four of which we offer to do together with a coach, what exactly do those modules look like? We have always a video And in that video, five fellow sufferers talk about the specific themes and they then explain how they, for example, work on acceptance or, for example, with questions for help. There is no one good methodology. There are several ways and well, different ways would also work. can work and based on those tips you might have some idea of what you think about H, I recognize that or Gosh that might work for me too, in addition to the video, we also really have an explanation There is some more theory there in but also tips from fellow sufferers and it also includes information sources with books that you can read or, for example, websites that contain information. Then you come to the assignment and the assignment is also an important part because that is where you reflect, because you have already heard or read that information and what does it mean for you now? How do you feel about acceptance, for example, are you still fighting the disease? And what do you think is important and do you get around to what you find important because that is actually the relevance, for example, of acceptance, but also of course that balance and activities, so that reflection that helps you to make a list of How is this for me now and that assignment if you you have completed it, you can fill it in yourself. When it is finished, the coach will see that you have completed it and will then provide you with feedback on this assignment. Based on that reflection, you may also consider that you might do things differently. want and what would you like to achieve and with the last part, the step-by-step plan, you try to work towards your goal in steps. What do you want to achieve and what should you pay attention to? What do you need to think of a solution for? And what are you going to do specifically and Wan Do you think that your goal has been achieved? These must be achievable goals, right? A goal like eh, I, I want the disease not to be there for me. That doesn’t work. You will also notice in those steps that the moment you progress and If it doesn’t work, it may also be that your goal is probably not achievable after all and then you go back a few steps and of course the coach can also offer help with this. We usually ask the coaches to sit on their hands as much as possible to maintain control. to the participant, but if necessary the coach can certainly think along. This of course gives an idea of what that program looks like, give you an idea of what those videos look like, right? You will also see these two ladies walking around today. These two ladies also contributed to the program and also shared with us, with each module they also indicated How is this for them and three other fellow sufferers also spoke and in this way we have put together the video and we hope that they can be inspiring for the participant to look at How could that work for us? Well, in this way I think I was able to stick to time within fifteen minutes and still be able to show you something of the program and the purpose of the program is to think with you about how you could be better at gripping the ropes and the saddle when it comes to self-management and the goal is of course ultimately to improve your resilience . increasing acceptance of a diagnosis is already a challenge, but that disease of course continues to pose challenges and therefore requires time and again to join in and see how I can deal with this again so that I can still ensure that I continue to enjoy it of life life which of course is still Yes important and eh and where a lot is still possible but where you are in control well this day will come back to it in different ways I am sure of that and I wish you a wonderful day today and uh also a lot of interaction and uh I also hope that there will be some sunshine to brighten up the day and I hope to meet or see you all again somewhere in the future Have a nice day everyone good luck ok Yes that was the presentation from An German um next to me you saw in the photo you also saw eh Karin who is eh today too so if you don’t know them yet then you will get to know them today she will also be on stage here later so eh just to with together with Theo uh somewhere uh to come and tell something but first we’re going n uh we’re talking about happiness and with who with with that of and I’ve known him for a long time years 0 about somewhere D VI don’t know when exactly you joined PR but we both worked at PR and among other things, I first enjoyed collaboration, I think J on eh, did you put something Yes, yes, then we already had eh eh regular eh contact with each other I was eh until the time I worked for Health and Beauty care so all brands that fall under that what was my doctor eh eh and there I was eh [Music] marketing I don’t remember marketing management assistants no Customer marketing Assist or something OK, I think that was marketing cmo Mar organization Yes, let me think about it so eh and that eh that I stayed eh for so long until I left B headed eh but in the last two years eh then he even became the manager eh of the department I had been away for a while in the meantime because something happened privately eh uh but then heard I via former colleagues from eh well now that is a position that is really something for you I saw at that moment Un life must be possible and eh well so I say Oh yes, great so I immediately apply for you Ard but yes they know me and it was in the meantime a Belgian invasion came again, so people from Belgium who do that at Pro Rotterdam eh had come in and eh then I met eh Kenneth Timmermans and he was actually my boss and eh there Yes that was that was those were really eh super years me that eh what we did in that department was to introduce the new brands so we brought Pringels from America to the Netherlands and that was eh really Super eh eh eh well yes he has worked at various companies and also at uneven eh well he is a great marketer, eh, he is now also more yellow, eh, well, he KW himself tells you all about it, you think it’s great that you are there, but dater view I think it’s very nice that you do this eh for me and eh, I’m very curious about your story I want to give you the floor [Applause] Thank you I would like to do it without a microphone, but of course I can only do that if you understand me well. Yes, if that is not the case, give me a shout and then, eh, I will take it just the microphone eh thank you eh w yes eh yes it was special It was eh indeed a long time since we met each other and recently we had eh a few months ago and then I actually heard from Wendy eh about Parkinson’s also about the initiative she took a few days later you asked me when you heard from me again that I have focused on Yes happiness for the past 10 years. I was director of the happiness institute of Erasmus University for 10 years until January 1, 2023 and to told you about the Event and then said I think luck and Parkinson’s fit and the way I look at it Look the way you look at it um they fit very well together and um yes I just got the story Of course I already got the honor before um yesterday that anarim eh says and they indeed fit very well with happiness um and that there so you will find a lot of recognition in what I say and I am standing here with great pleasure I once um eh There is a one It is in the form of a tapestry on which texts have been embroidered by the person who came up with those texts, they are in English, but the title of that is how to really Love A Child and eh, in my experience we will always be children, so one of the tips will be cherish the child within you, of course you are an adult, but ultimately the things you like as a child are dear and on that edged carpet there was, for example, so it is about that then about small children let them bang pots and pans eh go with them to the cinema to the movie in your pajamas strange thing but it also said say as often as possible Yes and that sentence in English say yes as Often As you can I have embraced it so if someone asks me something and it is somewhat possible for me then I do that and so when we asked Do you want to do that I did that I embraced that what am I going to do with you um um I um I’m going to tell you about the different forms of um happiness because there might be another meaning is in the main P, there are also different meanings, so maybe someone has something like yes, happiness, what can I do with it and often that has a background in how you think in your head what happiness is about, that’s what I’m talking about I’m also going to talk about what we know about the differences in happiness between people, eh, what explains why one person is happier than another and finally I’m going to talk about it. Should I stand there? no yes yes, we cannot check whether the people hear me at home, right, no Yes, otherwise they will say it in the chat they will say it in the chat top and the last thing I want to talk about with you is I have 15 tips I have 15 tips um that you could try to maybe to become a little bit happier I consciously say it this way, because Let’s stop thinking that every person is the same, people are different from each other, people who have Parkinson’s do not have Parkinson’s, every person has Parkinson’s and yes, for 95, we are very similar. you will ask all over the world What do you want your child to do? will be from Vietnam to Peru from the North Pole to South Africa bless all parents Fortunately that is what the first Slide is about when I finished VI Yes Can you w can we move that G That is so nice, yet you can recently see that Yes Do I have to move it? You’re fine too. Yes, great. Okay, um, this way I have, yes, when I was six years old my mother always told me that happiness is the most important thing in life and I went to school just like all of us and there we were asked what do you want to be when you grow up so you already feel it coming I wrote down luckily Ah that wasn’t quite the intention Because they said to me You did n’t understand the assignment properly so then I said to him you have life Not forgiving would be something if I said that when I was 6 years old. No, it wasn’t me. It wasn’t me. It was John R and unfortunately we can no longer ask him if he really said it, but it’s on the internet. on the internet is [Music] where it makes you think of eh actually how important it is and at the same time it is not something you talk about every day, maybe you do a little more but in the average Netherlands it is already called every day and that is that’s also only a good thing, but I’ll come back to that in a moment, so I’m going to start with what it actually is because it’s quite a vague abstract concept and er, the first happiness professor in the Netherlands Ruud Veenhoven has been working on this subject since the 00s, has a very useful developed a quadrant system in which you can clearly show the different meanings of happiness and I am going to start first with an effect can be temporary and temporary can be an hour can be a week sometimes a month sometimes a few months according to time but you also have effects that are much more durable, have a longer-lasting character, not always, but are very long-lasting, you get the slides via Wendy So then you know that write, take photos, but you also get those slides if, on the other hand, you have something that can take place in a domain the area of your life and something can have an effect on your life like geh I say an area of life life domain What would be an example of that work yes sick Yes it is your health Absolutely a domain family family absolutely a domain You could even be a family there eh There is a lot of difference between them, but that kind of belongs together as a domain. Yes, so those are about three domains that we have heard of, so there are also you. For example, your free time activities, your friendships, right? The social aspect, so to speak, for some people. is also religion or spirituality or your own development is a domain and your financial situation is also a domain so things can take place there and only relate to that or it can be so grand that it relates to an event that is happening to you life as a whole and uh I’ll take the example of Parkinson’s disease which relates to your life as a whole I’m going to approach it positively So that means that I’m going to start at the top left something that has a temporary effect that takes place in one of those domains and When we call that happiness, we often actually mean pleasure, a pleasure, an experience, an enjoyment, a moment of happiness and I think each of us can imagine that, and often that is, for example, a good conversation or, er, an unexpected, er, event or a a hug or Well, a eh a pain something you have experienced a moment of happiness Well you can also have that in the superlative degree, so to speak, so then it is even more intense and then it is not only a pleasant experience anymore but then it is a top experience e as a peak Experience and that not only provides a moment of happiness but also happiness Rust Who can give an example from his own life experience of what such a eh eh top experience is falling in love that is the ultimate example of a top experience Yes because it stands in the left column so it passes again but then it turns into holding the ride winding If it’s good Yes sustainable eh but it’s a fantastic example because it happens to you and at that moment it’s in G really then eh li on the pink Bolk the well-known pink Bolk, so you just look at everything that happens then through rose-colored glasses That is a beautiful V so a top experience is fantastic it is possible for Some people are climbing a Berk that they have wanted for a long time that that is that thing or this is also a nice example a duo jump Maybe I should explain That Mr. is the instructor and that lady wanted it a lot. I don’t think it’s the other way around, but it’s of course great if that’s still on you. Does anyone have a bucket list? Yes, okay if that’s on your Bucket l and you can still do that. is that fantastic for some people it is getting your driver’s license or getting a diploma Or running a marathon h there are all kinds of examples uh that you don’t do every day that sometimes requires some preparation Hey and that’s what you call you then have such a top experience, euphoric feeling as Ruud Veen said about himself. You immediately empathize with the Helal metaphor, but there is also a Vil to the top experience. What could be a pitfall of the top experience, more precisely, that ‘s sorry nexia you’re never busy enough like that. Yes, so a friend of mine who said yes, I have a Buist, I really want to run the marathon one day. Just once. Hey, I’ll do that and then I can cross it off. Done, so well, what did he do? He ran it and was completely happy, eh, of course, of course, eh, but at a certain point they are a few years later. Yes, no, I can’t because I’m going to run the marathon again, for example, I said eh, Huh, you would run it once anyway. What happened? Yes, my brother walked it in the meantime. Okay, so it was faster, so he thought yes, that won’t happen and that’s a funny example, but there are people who think that they get happiness, sustainable happiness, by collecting. of as much top experience as possible and especially young people want to work during the week, but it’s about the weekend and then we let loose with or without the help of external stimulants because then we look for that Kick We look for that adrenaline We look for that euphoria but every time you have to give a strong impulse to experience that same Kik everyone wants more that is the alou from the top so there are a lot of good examples but that is what you have to be careful with you think that this will lead to lasting happiness and that is not the case, there are also sustainable forms of happiness and we call that a bit of cord domain satisfaction, it cannot be said as per domain that we have just named your health finances your ehd family you can all give a kind of score, right? I now give a grade to the relationship or I give a Z to my free time, etc. and so you see that job satisfaction is one domain in life eh but eh eh that is part of that domain satisfaction well then you have the last form and eh that’s what I mean when I use the word happiness and that’s actually about your life as a whole what grade do you give to your life as a whole eh and that’s what we call happiness in life or life field doing or quality of life and quality of life too in health care is an important concept, so you might think that happiness is about what quality of life do I experience now? Well, let’s talk about that a bit, well, of course, if you have never sailed for pleasure, never once had a head. have experience if you do not give a Red score in the domain that is important to you, yes then you probably do not have a lot of lensing, but the most important conclusion is that it also works the other way around, in other words everything you H as a report from your Lev Gee you take to your relationship you take with you to work h is the old idea, for example, keeping work and private life separate, that is not possible at all because you are taking yourself with you, for example, people who end up in a burnout, that is quite a lot nowadays, but in the past it was only people from 40 45 50 it is now already from 28 32 So you also think that you have that And then it turns out that in only 18 of the cases of burnout the cause is work and in 46 of the cases it is much more privately honored but no Yes, the prospect of work because you can no longer do that at that moment, so you cannot automatically separate work and PR, so I really always reason from the whole and from those eh lives, I think Well, nice story that top experience enjoyable experience What about the negative side is unhappiness part of happiness question mark yes here many people are against happiness because they have the impression Oh yes then I will definitely have to stand on the table all day dancing with something with a cup and a hat on oh sorry no um so unhappiness is absolutely part of happiness and Dirk de Wachter maybe you have heard that a psychiatrist in Belgium um he has written a nice book The Art of Being Unhappy um and um eh it helps because every person you of course too special, but every person has to deal with nice things in their lives but also with less nice things, that can be sadness, that can be disappointment or rejection and that can also have to do with illness, so it is part of it and eh, so we have to talk about that too and that is why he has dismissed himself, especially in the age of social media that all 10 and young adults are on eh ne are all on h say that was a Boomer no on Facebook or Instagram or tiktok and there you see a lot of people then the beautiful side of themselves they show and everyone else who doesn’t know him thinks he has a cool life and there I am I don’t have a cool life at all and that has that idea of Fear of missing out and eh eh like if I’m not happy then it’s just me because who can do it and Z has fed that a lot and D is of course not like that but yes you need some years of counting before you know that and he is busy worrying about bad luck and I I think that is very good. Well, if you put that together and then you can make a kind of description of happiness and then on the one hand the extent to which someone continues is not always possible, isn’t it pleasant, feels pleasant, feels nice and on the other side is satisfied with life as a whole when it comes to happiness, so here you see two components, namely on the one hand your feeling, the emotion, the mood and on the other hand you have much more sensible, rational, more happiness and that is not contradictory. this coexists because your mood goes up and down throughout the day, one moment you like, one moment you feel better than the other and your conversation is nicer than the other, all those things for work are very important. It used to be that you have these position, these tasks are part of success, the new thinking is more and more. You already have this position, these tasks come with it, but look at what you are good at. I will give the example of administration, um, some people, even if you are in sales. Then you have you still have administrative tasks, so to speak, there are people who say I have a brother who is dying of it and I find it annoying. fits and work together as a team to see how you can solve it, so the person who likes it does a little more of it and the person who doesn’t like it does something about it, so you have your feeling and you have your and so you can say it is so that you can be happy but you can’t feel happy, that’s possible, right? It could be that you give your life a seven, maybe even an eight, and you just have a [ __ ] day, it can be the other way around, so that you give your life a, for example Z meager enough, but that you are having a great day so it exists side by side emotion mood left side on the other hand you have a lot of stable actually it is the important events sometimes Life Changing Life Changing evien word and they mainly influence the right side h but it you relationship gives h that is not very different on a day than on Wednesday while at the same time on Wednesday you can have an argument or a What do you call that a eh discussion or a very nice moment and yet it remains a short figure reasonably stab so there is important, those two things are next to each other, I would like to ask you to close your eyes for a moment and think about something, a moment, an event that makes you very happy h, a smile appears on some people’s lips, some people want to stay in the moment, eh someone who wants what came to your mind eh infatuation infatuation Mo a long time ago recently eh 10 years ago 10 years ago beautiful what came to mind for you Z vag oh in love wow congratulations yes yes how come we come to you for your family a specific moment or more generally in general Okay yes yes yes yes what came to your mind yes eh I have been in Spain for two weeks now my son again yes kn Yes it was a long time ago you yes but yes exactly and then it is Hela someone else who wants to share what came to mind Yes my daughter lived in New Zealand for 35 years and I came to work and she stood in front of me I already had Parkinson’s and I never had that but at the same time it was very happy Yes maybe not everyone has it can hear but my daughter lived in New Zealand and she suddenly stood in front of me uh at work now at home but I came home from work oh came home from work eh but in any case yes yes well it could be that um that turns out, so a lot of these kinds of things that come to mind are about an experience and by that I don’t mean about buying a new bag for example or [Music] good I have Silvie Meis Moors say I love all my 600 bags but So it’s often not about that, I have his experience. All the examples you have given are actually there. Dr. you had taken into account that you would fall in love again and get married again well No Yes hope yes but expectation is in the other So there is also something extra in it there is something extra in it if it is unexpected if it does so in the summer, the weather is beautiful for a month, yes on day 28 And you are on beautiful weather again, I think yes, it was yesterday too and the day before yesterday and last week also very nice but okay While in the winter when I suddenly have beautiful thoughts with the sun and it is not raining and it is a bit cold then that is an extra gel you know you expect the third is not surprising that it has something positive that is quite logical and the fourth is that it is often not always with other people so I am curious um I would like to see fingers because you just had your example You just saw these four things which of you had two of these four features at least two at least two Who even had three Who even had four Yes what eh was eh the example that you came up with yes um we have been eh guest in Germany with And we went one evening to make beautiful eh eh the Wines and it was really dear to hear that you are originally from France eh New Zealand Yes certainly yes that is it is that because some people go on a mo full of top holiday always Which holiday because it is almost impossible that all holidays are a top experience so often it is or something you have wanted for a long time after jand for example Canada or Indonesia h you save for that you work towards and then you go on a special trip or something happens and then it can be next door which is very special Hey in that sense Germany was secondary because it was going at the time yes and everything that came together and that made it so special and a great experience and that is also a surprise and good. Well, I already said that happiness is measurable, in fact, based on one question. Can you ask someone how happy they are and that is this question took everything together How satisfied or dissatisfied are you with your life as a whole, so everything together G all those domains together G the grade you give for, say, your uh happiness in life your uh quality of work and people do that and it turns out that this has been the case all over the world for a very long time and the average in the Netherlands may not be very visible but it is a 7.3 in the Netherlands, erm, we have been in the top six of the world for a very long time on average And you see Finland Denmark Iceland Sweden are the first four So everyone who thinks I must necessarily live in Spain h Spain is not on the map at least with the first Twitter quite plain below well Italy you will not find the United States Word first in 10 years that this has been published that is no longer in the top I guess most people are depressed they live there and in Finland Yes, very sharp comment I have an answer I’m going to tell you but I will do that in three SL then you will see eh that is also a 7.7 or a 7.5 5 7.5 is Iceland 7.5 Finland 7.7 but it is also striking that it is all Scandinavian countries Yes yes so then let’s not answer the question How come h so what explains it eh is also interesting there are 11 countries in the world and New Zealand is at 11 Yes go we are not talking about no um 11 countries in the world that have a 7.0 or higher but eh even Well Belgium is here let’s accelerate a bit and eh do you see Germany here no so Belgium is 6.9 where the Netherlands is 7.3 is eh what explains Well let’s keep it a bit close to home what explains Well do you think that on average the Dutch are happier than the bell it social it social health care healthcare prosperity safety net Sorry friendship friendship social friendship Yes you know what the most important thing is quality of the government knows that is under pressure in the Netherlands, but we all live long enough to know that in itself the Dutch government, where do you notice, for example between Belgium and the Netherlands, that you are back in the Netherlands, so that is a small example of quality of but Also another aspect of the quality of the government is corruption in many countries, er, it is not that you are treated with no respect, as they say, so if you are from that family or that tribe or have so much money, you get better treatment by the government than if you don’t have that and that feels very unsafe and unfair as a citizen, well in the Netherlands it is pretty well arranged except for a flurry of Groningen Ter Apel and eh and that is why it is under pressure and this is exactly the so it is simply known how important this is quality, it often applies, so money and happiness are also related, eh freedom is very important and freedom goes further than just no earl but freedom is also about May I dress the way I do want to dress Can I follow the religion that I want can I choose the profession that I want can I choose an education Can I fall in love with who I want then I can have the gender all those big lens choices that freedom that the Netherlands is also so famous for on state liberal thought good free thought is therefore very important health care and especially the extent to which mental health care has been developed there are still many countries in the world where they simply do not recognize that you can be mentally ill does not exist you are only physically ill sick and so there are no psychiatrists, no rooms, psychologists, because yes, you cannot be mentally ill and the fifth is man-woman equality. Yes, man-woman equality, which is also a man, so those five explain three-quarters of the differences between the reported happiness in countries Well this is the top 20 but there is also a bottom 20 and I don’t know if I can read it but what is the least happy country in the world wa Afghanistan Afghanistan with an average scale of 1 to 10 of a 1, 7 try to imagine that you give your life É how many people should not give an É if you know that there is always an Elite in a country How the people live Oh well, given exactly and what is the worst thing there [Music ] happens women girls are not allowed to go to school and then I am going to make it even worse in Afghanistan Can a woman when she is ill only be helped by a female doctor now there are still ones who have been trained earlier female doctors girls are not allowed to go to school how do we go doing that It’s a real scandal and so maybe he saw that series Eh our man in the Taliban that’s the same man Th Hering who also made that Iranian eh with a judge who was really in tears in the back of his car who didn’t dare to give it in tears about his daughter and how he gave up on that and so why am I telling this now and sometimes it helps to realize that you live in a nice country after all, he said it and try to focus on what is okay and good and it helps you to be grateful for that without being happy that you were originally born in Afghanistan, people flee there and I understand that very well, but also in a state like India, 126 average people live in India, only a billion people of a 4.0, so the average in the world is less, is just slightly above the Vi and for us that is 7.3, now the explanation for how it happens that in Iceland And in Finland and eh there are many depressed people in this picture I am going to explain This is the picture of the Netherlands but with a little bit to the right this is the flat of Finland and of Iceland most people in l in The Netherlands give their lives an eight, a lot of people give their lives a seven or a nine. What I found surprising when I saw this is how many people give 10 for their lives and you could say that only few people give their lives. that is 6 PR and another 6 PR gives his life an insufficient grade so you could say an average of 7.3 top six in the world for the Netherlands Finland even world champion and on but that is not the whole story Because if I get 6 percent So everyone In The Netherlands iner six Gee releases on 17 million people how many people are we talking about, will you actually help for the people who miss out on who have more than a million and then we have more than 6 percent who become an insufficient data l so then we are once again at the m and in those people and that gap, so also for Finland and for Iceland there are people with depression and even Eh n the self eh and so it is not if the mentioned were a 9.5 then that number would be much smaller but that is not D a 7.3 that is fantastic but there are still many people that we see around us who are not happy who are angry who are sad etc. And that is where I want attention also for the vague because every person counts and ultimately it is in our All interest that as many people as possible feel comfortable because the people who do not feel comfortable either become depressed or take to the streets to riot, which is what we see now, right? More and more we see that on those people have short fuses and we see that it is in all our interests that you can enforce it with as many people as possible, but in the end yes they feel long eh with themselves well what explains Well the difference between These people so they have average on the same government on average the same man woman equality on average et cetera and yet there are differences yes no sorry I am I thought maybe we can just give a little one Yes we will do great thank you yes eh well 25 is explained by the circumstance that is already for you As an individual you are outside your influence and you see that coincidence is part of it. You have something to do with that, coincidence. I think I dare to say that everyone here cares about you, right? Just to put it simply, it ‘s a lot of bad luck that it will happen to you too. That’s not something you what you were able to do about it, so that’s also a coincidence and that also applies to Well, so you could have just been at the wrong party that a truck is coming down [Music] I’m coming here, it makes me feel bored, my wife yesterday her colleague I lost my daughter that day, luckily it’s okay, but I did ask, hey, there are mental challenges. Yes, just don’t bring your phone and that of course the age is literally life-threatening, right? Because in that category mainly girls, I do n’t have to finish it. Um, so and yes, to some extent you can say that that is your role as a do, but for you you can’t do anything about it, it can happen, just say it is true, that is most of it and they call that life skills, that is three quarters of the differences three quarters of the differences are explained by life skills, some of which you cannot influence, then you have inherited it from your parents and ancestors. What is in your genes? One person is a bit more pessimistic in nature than other people. What is partly in your genes. but the good news is that 45 so 75 30 that you can influence that that you can train that that you can shape that how do I deal with the things that happen in my life That is some life values good and bad I also have very many people who are millionaires are extremely unhappy, it cannot be predicted, but they cannot deal with it, that sounds strange, but they think that everyone who is nice to them wants something from them that they are nice because they are millionaires there. see, for example, in football players who at a certain point have talents, but at a certain point it really becomes something that is still a small category of people who have talent. Already in a small category, everyone plays football that time G, what are their most important friends often the people they know from before they were famous and famous because they trust that yes that was then because of who I am yes yes in other words guys it’s a mental game life it’s the story come back to it later after the break eh what you make erv but the last question is where do we learn this life skills through damage and sch a little bit maybe for your parents if you’re lucky if they get the have a predisposition for a bit of a time, then imagine that as a child you come to the foster parents, we learn this at school, yes, also a bit through damage and disgrace, right, one of the things I am committed to now is that we are at school Yes, of course and there is also the fact that we count language, all those things, but formation , so to speak, as a human being, so those life skills and there is not just one way, right? But tips What can you do, Annaline, who also gave in your situation, then we can also have children G because more than one in three children usually have to deal with divorce and what do children think, who is to blame? I was certainly not nice that D did not have secondary education, but that happens now that we can help children with that, so I have the Life Skills Foundation was founded in August last year and I am now working with people from the field to develop a package where the teacher can start the conversation once every three to four weeks at school to talk about things like that and give some tips. give what other people have benefited from your situation We’ll see cool You also have a break yes just a 10 minute break yes oh people can be reached easily Channel other communities that every about verri disappointment but also about trou and about a lot of people untrauma about have that’s why it shouldn’t be You can never eat you if you give me some coins [Music] [Music] eh This is nice because n [Music] 10 yes [Music] [Music] no [Music] Jen do Yes I saw you when mom came to pick me up [Music] Do you also like that [Music] yes [Music] he yes [Music] e Oh they have withdrawn the other one Yes I don’t know why but that was Yes there is no one we are sitting there are three in it can’t see who or so you can get that [Music] but last time it was [Music] [Music] here ste tos m are [Music] Yes [Music] nice yes [Music] Po [Music] because that Hee quitel so ne you kje with you quickly yes yes [Music] [Music] thank you, we are a little bit on the right track do you like it eh then I have a question ask you now before x or y happens Or you do will feel better yes yes satisfaction satisfaction much more satisfaction yes yes yes certainly energy more energy Yes All the same yes So there are actually a lot of Yes Jeen Z benefits eh eh to um people indeed have more energy feel productive have more sense I think baby a good example of that is How much energy She has, eh, from the approach that I say, I often compare happiness with the word space and by that I mean space if your life is a kind of bucket at the moment you are happy. your space in your bucket when the bucket is Helal full or perhaps overflowing. Do you have your hands full with yourself? You care for the other person, but you also have no room for the things that happen around you. Curiosity can affect the child. Kite when what kind of moments if you have a problem and you have to think about how am I going to solve it at what kind of moments find you will find the right solution if you walk a lot because then the KJ is your answer, then you will get answers to questions that you have not even asked yet and that is due to the space in time and physically that is created when you walk through the beautiful forest if you can handle it What a beautiful environment that gives pleasure and pleasure gives space space and becoming a cave so happiness is also very much about Are you able to create that space when it is not there I understand that sometimes it is not always is easy, but then you understand what it is about because then the creative ideas arise. You are also more motivated, more involved, happier. Citizens are more involved in society with other people, but even if you have room in your bucket, unexpected things always happen. every person is characterized by unexpected things. You now know when you know what to do. If you have space in your bucket, you can deal with it much easier than when there is actually nothing left to add, so you are more flexible and become more resilient . other people around you notice it, right? You take it with you and the people around you experience more peace, eh, more at ease, eh, you’re not just concerned with a eh, short term, a very famous study was done with a very blunt title and that title is why poor people make stupid decisions that’s blunt isn’t it But it is true can someone explain why that is Yes you the AD must respond to things Yes ADOK must respond to things poverty no stress stress your look their bucket is full their bucket is full they are busy with next year they are busy with next week in fact they are busy with surviving tomorrow and then you don’t look at the consequences in the longer term that also explains where everyone attacks Dan How can it be that very poor, but he is looking at a 60 inch wide screen. Those are the impulse purchases for some of the other phase compensatory behavior, erm and hey, you also have to be kind to yourself, so if possible, when your salary has just been deposited into the benefit, yes then you do that and the European Championships are coming but we have to be a little kind to each other so that’s why I also tell you this the grip for each other is very important so if you don’t have that if you have space in your bucket then you can also look over that Are you not surviving Are you living and In short, more space more capacity I call it overcapacity but you need you for unexpected events and ultimately you just notice that in your health I don’t want to say that that is specifically for people with Park so money I don’t know that, but in general it applies that stress also does something to you physically, it eats you up, so if you have a lot of that, see if you can find someone who can help you get some more space, I heard that also in the module looking for a rich man a rich man have you always been a Gold Digger Of course always Yes Yes No but it is true that money and luck are related and that may be even more true for you because you spend more but I don’t know what that is exactly, but I believe that has already been suggested. So everyone who always says money and happiness have nothing to do with each other is not true, it is true that the moment you just think about it, you know what it’s about It’s about uh can I afford my house can I afford a car can I go on holiday once a year if I have children can I give them a study that just takes the normal things above and beyond happiness in terms of satisfaction and they call that hedonistic adaptation, in other words it is easy to imagine a salary increase, if you get that you are very happy with the first month, the second month too and the third month you have forgotten that you have three months ago salary because you also adjust your query pattern and then you are up to it Yes, I wanted to come back to those figures, but do you also see an age there and good question um that is the u Curve de vagas do you see differences in age and happiness The answer is the hour let’s see who is sitting if so right eh yes this is where I should start 20 years eh 80 years low average eh 50 for everyone who has been 50 Only go up everyone still has to be you know when it is depth After that it all becomes Bet You can do it you know what eh eh always difficult with numbers because you talk about average so those are always exceptions so you should just forget about that but on average the most difficult age group with characteristics: the woman of about 30 35 a little earlier, say between 25 and 35 who is higher educated with a boy who is completely full of six 20 women, on average, suffer from guilt more than men on average, so happy that there are hardly any men today they make it a little easier to be distracted, the women have a feeling that they are lacking everywhere and those Wieren have everything and that is why the higher educated because the moment you have a better education you also expect more from yourself and you think that others have more from you. expecting you so that comes as an extra point eh but you know as you get older so you, contrary to what is often said, we have reported the happiest elderly people in the world on average and then also the best children in the world eh so eh only you So we have to look through that because, as I showed earlier, there are a lot of people for whom that does not apply because I just said about that money. I think we all know that the elections that just took place in November were one party and then a lot of parties went. that after monkeys You were also going to talk about that because the important theme of them was security of existence and that is because you can no longer have your drink and your day and at the moment you have the feeling that I was just working hard and then I still can’t just do the things that all people normally think they do and then I can’t buy a house then you lose a bit of hope if you lose hope and you are a bit radical then you go on the street so it is not convenient that we do that but that is suddenly known, the longest running research that lasted more than 75 years, carried out by the university, a book was written about the good life, a Tex Talk if you want it and there they ask themselves one question, what predicts the best a happy one healthy living what they did they selected a group of people in their 20s um and they followed them every year until their death that is why the research in Meels was completed because it started in 1920 and so all this time they have um what do you think was the most important predictor of happy health relationships in relationships in your life wa not dealing with adversity dealing with adversity where you were born B where you were born being seen being seen being recognition Yes it wasn’t it It was indeed relationships sometimes I didn’t know at the moment. Yesterday I did it too. I sometimes have a picture in there and then I show a dollar bill so then I take you in a fje I didn’t do that now but if I was no no no and then will there be a dollar bill No and then I say indeed No that’s not celebrity it doesn’t work very much nor do relationships in the sense of network but in the sense of connection of connection with other people and that is recognition appreciation I can be there someone else cares about me because of who I am in that happiness survey of all those countries a question is asked and that makes me think and the question is do you have you in your life One person you can fall back on when it is really necessary and I I hope that all of us here can answer that question Yes, but the fact that the question is about one person is not. Do you have 10 means that there are also a lot of people in the world and also in the Netherlands who do not have that? not having someone to fall back on if necessary, I will come back to that in a little bit, good relationships keep us happier and healthier because social connections are really good for people and that is why loneliness is deadly and loneliness has two sides, loneliness has two sides. but the psychological side and the internet has the social side the social side is how many friends do I have but that is not what is fatal if you feel lonely with yourself despite having a lot of friends that is what is necessary that is why I am so worried that the loneliness below young people is increasing and you see it almost a few months later in the number of people who contact us via E1 three very happy that you see it increasing and you also see the number of suicides increasing fortunately there are relatively few people but yes it will be your child be a man, isn’t it for girls it’s mainly teenagers Where is it after the majority of men I can’t do 10 of them luckily not all very well but I do so loneliness is deadly and this is a very important one so it goes It’s not about the quantity, it’s not about the number of relationships, in fact, it’s not about whether or not you have a life partner and one step further. It’s also not about whether you chat with your life partner every day if you do have one you know. Those couples Maybe the ones who are hell-bent on each other that you think how until someone says something about the partner from outside and then Jan says don’t come to ING in the same way and does the same That’s what counts so that’s also where the idea lies I got That’s what it’s all about when things get really difficult we can do what we want but in the end I’m your catch That’s what it’s about And I hope everyone has that so it doesn’t have to be the life partner that’s F but it’s not possible either Being Irish but that’s the one thing if you feel like you don’t have it Yes then it is very lonely there are people what we actually want most is a Quick fix something tangible something that we can get or buy so that we can have a happy life and happy relationships Having and Keeping but that’s not how relationships work relationships are messy and complicated and the hard work to take care of your family or your friends is not sexy or Flam giant Moreover, it is lifelong and it takes a long time like that my mother always said as a child Wait, I’ll do it, work on your relationship, it’s also an effort but it’s important eh when it comes to happiness so make sure you connect with other people and working together is called the most difficult form of work eh but that is where you can look for the connection in what way can the essence of happiness be expressed in two words then it is the other person All examples You almost never saw it with the four characteristics of all people, right There is always someone else involved or the birth or falling in love or your daughter eh or the conversation with loved ones, almost always there are other people there, let’s take a look, let’s do that, do you enjoy doing the exercise, it is a bit of an exciting exercise, not dangerous We are going to do it just if you want, stand for a moment [Music] and then I would like to ask you to eh, how not to leave your place, but to look for someone and from the moment I give the signal that one person comes and you do that look into each other’s eyes for 30 seconds and then look at each other and make contact. Try to discover a positive quality. What is positive about the and I give up when you no longer look at each other, say nothing and then you tell each other what you have seen, nice, like dating, you do that Okay, I’m going to give the signal in a moment and I will do that when I am quiet [Music] and then I want some time now Go Z like this Okay 30 seconds so now tell the other person the k characteristic that you have seen first one then me n always Y [Music] all n I wonder why this is so much fun I enjoy doing this so much is to feel the energy that I just felt to hear you talking to each other to connect to make a connection these are fantastic moments um And I understand that you could do much more sorry to interrupt you Who fell in love with the other person in those 30 seconds Yes that is possible isn’t it That might be possible for there 27 talk seems to be that 27 that you can ask men and women or women woman man and if you answer with the two of them then the promise is that you are loved by each other yes in any case it is funny as an experiment every person has become deeply need to be part of something that is bigger than him, if you have that feeling, then you don’t feel lonely and that is why it is together, for example with sports, it is really much more fun if you participate in a team sport you win if you win as an individual athlete Yes, if you can play tennis very well then you should just do it, but it is less fun than if you play football with handball, yes softball, eh, but also another important point that I always make and I will also do with you I think this I did n’t think it myself because I think it’s brilliant funny thing is funny Are you happy Yes keep doing what you are doing now are you happy No do you want to be happy No keep doing what you are doing now are you happy No, do you want to be happy? Yes, change it. It’s that simple. But also allow the other person to say Well, I’m not happy and I don’t want to be happy and I really sincerely mean that. We are already far too much that we mean well, sometimes often. say you know what you should do, watch that movie, read that book and Google also agrees with that, nice, um, so remember this and I also say this, for example, companies, people who work at companies, then the company that is going to start a new initiative and uh 80 hey he says well it’s probably 10 says Yes there’s a bit of pastry in it and 10 says he’s also figured it out again Boy, nice and my uh advice is always let those people do what we often do we’re going to put pressure on people do it now Don’t be so silly, just join in Oh there you and you again, you always know it was strange, what happens then you trigger the ego and if you trigger the ego then it becomes a battle and if it becomes a battle and someone changes their mind on the way Well it was n’t too bad yes nice I would get in but not anymore if the ego is fragile because then we have turned it into a competition we already make a WD of everything so so keep the freedom h with the other person that he can also say I don’t participate for a while That’s what I often use a van but not a van with the question if this is the metaphor of your life Where do you sit Z steering wheel or are you sitting on the passenger seat the passenger seat And who is behind the wheel and is you making a comment on the driver or maybe you are even sitting at the back saying in English and from the back you are Omar a actually you can for your whole life but you can also use the domains that we had in the beginning, you can also yourself teasing I found out for myself My father passed away 17 years ago when he was 65, it was quite young, eh, it had a long run-up and in terms of illness and um, eh, but at a certain point in those last years I especially noticed that I was behind the wheel of his bus was there and he liked that and I liked that until I realized what I was doing I thought Yes, but I shouldn’t be like that your so your life You can decide of course, right, so it’s always two sides of the story And I thought that was yes, insightful V I realize that I think that this is for everyone for our money so I wish everyone also children also children of 8 years Come and let them say that they are behind the wheel of their own bus and that means The consequence is that you as a parent sometimes think don’t do it don’t do it and that the child thinks well guided on h Confess and by guided you mean you are I got your and then you allow them to experience for themselves I always think like that child now 13 and 15 um what would I have wanted my parents to have done at that time and of course you can give advice no problem but then I don’t have to go into HB is the law no um but if you D you think differently and in the end you can indeed do that on a mek on eh but that’s how you learn father is Zen eh eh yes so you grant every person his autonomy Z there that pendulum inel again z there that pendulum inel Yes Da sing Yes exactly so what story do you tell yourself Look you have events and you have the story or maybe story the event happened did you have influence on it when it happened maybe not but now it has happened no influence and you have the story the meaning you attribute to the event the interpretation of the event What is it all about happy the story the meaning that you attribute to the event that have been given Park That is not I would like to, I would probably do it myself, but that is not possible at the moment, that is what happened My father has died, that is not possible, so it is about the story that I make it happen that happens for all of us at the event you don’t have ined the story so it’s all about that you make a story of an event that helps you that serves you and there are other people who think something about it, there are probably so many opinions, there are other people who would make a different story of the same event, there are probably so many people who agree with it, but don’t care. is not important The only thing it is about is your story you what you believe in that is the only thing because it is your story that is your right to make your story because it is important to know because we can invent the event no longer, but the story can already be told and that could also mean that the story I am making up now of the same event is that perhaps in 5 years or in 10 years I will make a completely different story of that event and I am not going to tell you which story you should make of which event and you can think about it yourself, I have made a story of the event that helps me that serves me and if that is not the case consider making another story for yourself of myself help yourself do yourself so which you tell yourself the story, I thought it was a very important insight for myself, what could you do? I’m going to end here at eh, eventually, eh? Because it’s not feasible, in the end maybe when it happened , eh, say Well, I’ve become a bit happier, a solution has been achieved an effect not a goal there is no one way to so I want you Finally, for 15 possible things you could consider trying that have been proven to help for a large enough group 1 think about what is happening is going well instead of what is missing or not going well gratitude I have put a question mark in the diary, by which I mean there are people who every day take a moment to think about one or two or three things that are going well and those people that helps, I know someone who has been doing that faithfully every day for 20 years. It helps for him. I tried it for a week, it’s not for me, that’s exactly what I mean, so see if that’s something for you. Do you think so? And if it doesn’t every day is every week, right? I mean it doesn’t matter so Focus on what is going well on those kinds of two you will recognize them look for happiness in experiences and in relationships not in things We occasionally reflect on what is becoming increasingly difficult in today’s world at Yes, those things that VI celebrate your successes, right four nice things three Be true to yourself not to what others expect Maybe you have heard of uh the research that a woman who thought in Australia but it could be new Zeeland bronny weare has done and she worked in palliative care for a long time guiding people in the last phase of life and she asked all those people imagine you could do it again what would you do differently and the most the answer given was I wish I had remained faithful to Ho, I wanted it myself and not focused on the expectations of others and that is a huge psychological game, that is what we humans, er we imagine, is that we think that others expect that of us expect it but actually we often don’t know it at all we think that is expected of us and that is what we focus on Well most people said so let it go and date what I just said your own story yourself the steering wheel of your bus that is your life you have the right to make of it what you want and that also includes be kind be kind to yourself who child if you are kind to yourself in your space and are you also kind to others and forget you will be one of telling the most intense stories I have ever heard When it comes to forgetting her name is Enin Biel and Biel went to South Africa in her twenties to help in townships there and was raped and allegedly by three black men who are men are not identified They went to prison, spent a long time in prison and what happened, Eny’s parents started a foundation together with two of the three because the boys realized I ca n’t live with that, I don’t know where it comes from, so we want to help prevent others from doing the same and they have therefore forgiven. I mean that is the most difficult thing there is, in a brutal way too, because they believe in their faith that if you do not want to be chased in the it is normal that you have to put your eyes out after that jeand have gel hd so really just and that said in their heart And why do I say that because it helps yourself it helps yourself if you are able to forgive and then we would at least have one less television program that’s called n Yes but I mean it Fam the family boys You only have one father and only one mother and that is unavoidable and what I have ever learned in my life she is my father so my mother has passed away They are Children are also victims in a sense, as there are annoying things and I don’t have it happening to me, I notice that breaking up from home is also difficult. Well, there are children there, but worse things are not, but I did help you a lot. To see They only do in good faith or what their mind helps them with which they are not very good at talking to. That is something different but I did ask myself the question does it help me to be angry or not and if the answer is yes it is if it helps you to be angry Be angry You have every right if you think hm Maybe it is better served by not being angry then choose that forget four mindset it is not about the circumstances or events there I told you about it, it ‘s about how you deal with it, then you just create your own story and focus your attention on what you have influence on or ever Steven Covi eh at eh kar he eh eh the eight most sold menb in the world eh and he already said it You have the Circle of Inf and cir Of Control circ of concern and we often worry a lot I’m afraid that pub talk is a director of a social and cultural Planning Office, isn’t it a title I’m doing well, but the country is going well to hell and that’s pub talk, right? So yes, all that outside wall caught the theme, but that was 20 years ago too, right? And then you asked those people, have you ever met a refugee, experienced a barrel? I didn’t, but eh, well I read in the newspaper and is not going well and so a lot of those things worry us about those sitting there It ‘s about where inv is fine to have at the table Z you know early we talk about Vi try to encourage optimism to think positively There are exercises where you can try to think about what is the best version of myself and you can shift that a bit And sometimes that gives insight into a hero in other words are you a red button or a green button look red buttons think in I used to have a problem Greetings knock thinking in our future and I don’t write anything for it it’s your choice do I want to be a red button or do I want to be a green button six others said it too accept accept that sadness, disappointment or setbacks are part of it one of the things that we as a society can really do a lot with, right? We ‘re not talking about it. Boys are generally still raised not to cry. Vink is tough. Girls are allowed to Hil, not too much and so on. We have to it is also discussed in the classroom at organizations, as far as I am concerned, feelings emotion There is a very large group of people who are angry very large group of people who are growing are anxious are afraid there is a very large group of people who have Verriet raw trauma even sometimes you know that you couldn’t even say that we have to talk about that. You can’t solve it all, but the fact that you can talk about it with each other and that the other person also knows it makes a connection and is the HT of the solution and so we have to talk about it have seven think and don’t compare too much the grass at the neighbor’s is not greener maybe once but I long term so to speak And it is indeed one and at the campsite too No but really You don’t get any happier from comparing, for example from social media Oh yes, I do have a nice not. That doesn’t make you happy because daton is in our human being that is called the nega nega people who, for example, I suggest uh you fill in the form and uh 80 90 really liked it and that’s one person and he says well I didn’t find anything at all What do I do then h all my energy there and not because I am different from others that is the netivity B have to face one point of criticism there should be eight compliments that work in our brain like that D is of course crazy but that’s what I do you by comparing some people who are famous get rid of social media, they don’t get it all, it’s very sensible just not eh with things like that eh just say eh busy don’t compare too much eight Try something new cherish your curiosity and important tip because the beginning of something new is difficult make you challenges are just very small and manageable, I want to learn to play the guitar and I can’t do that, don’t tell yourself I have to study every hour, but tell yourself I’m going to eat for 2 minutes a day, that’s okay. No, but there is a chance that you do it is much bigger than if you say to yourself I’m going to do it for an hour and maybe it is true that once you Maybe it is true that taking the step come and start running is more important than the duration of it if I jli well can tempt Omer to start anyway, maybe in practice you will play a lot more than Z, right? But then you have vo It’s a mind game It’s a story you want to tell yourself, help yourself so make it manageable make it whole small don’t say to yourself I have to walk for an hour start with 2 minutes and maybe when you have changed into an outdoor pool and you think oh yes then I can go through this well then That is exactly what the intention is nine relax meditate yoga mindfulness breathe then go right next to Maybe you know Michael P who says everyone has to say no 30 of the people seem to benefit a lot from Mind and that’s a lot of people so do it we’re not going to pretend it works for 100 h that’s often rings think what you Moen but maybe it will help you for a lot of people it will help and often turn off the phone I think it is very good that we are now going to say in schools that dent is gone you know the algorithms we call the youngest generation the algorithm generation hey, those algorithms are so clever that they know exactly what you want, so they make you addicted and it’s bizarre that the smartest minds of this generation are working to get children addicted to something like social media and other things, so put your mind to it phone off more often 10 exercise I deliberately say not exercise and that is not because of you You are everywhere you can exercise But at least exercise so just walk One of the positive things about Corona what f moment you or if you walk one is cycling If that is possible and for something where you can have peace and quiet and nature and try to eat healthy so don’t You should become a Vegetarian try to pay attention to that 11 make a mash once That’s what I just tried with practice put together in the car, but I do it often and it gives me a lot of energy when I make contact with someone I don’t know and, er, the other person often enjoys it too, spend more time and attention on loved ones and friends Ehm, if you spend less time on the phone, you will spend more time there, eh, we have seen that relationships are the most important predictor. So try to spend time and attention there. 13 make someone else happy. Make someone else happy. Is making yourself happy. Some people then start discussion Yes, so it is not altruistic. It benefits you too. Yes, thank you for the cuckoo, every person acts in their own interests and that is healthy, but how nice is it when it is a win-win. It is useful to me and it is useful to you, why not? If it only benefits you and not me, we sometimes find this in a primal mother who completely purifies herself for the children, no me time and I do it all for you, no, you have to do it for yourself too h They sometimes say if you want to take good care of someone else Go yourself Z it starts eh and an example is so maybe you have a random Act Of kindness just do something nice that is also my Z Yes Often As you can it sometimes happens to me that I in Rotterdam where I live in the city and then here comes to me and here comes a whole story about eh the bus is missed and I get stabbed I also understand that what is coming and I will be back Can I have it and I come back and I sometimes understand I mean I’m not crazy and I’m not, so I’m not going to see that tenner again, but of course I will respect you and you will then receive a 10 14 for me if you have something beautiful in mind. for example, someone sees that someone looks beautiful and nowadays in the age of kennel and what not and you would hardly dare to say more I hardly dare anymore I do it to tell a woman that she looks beautiful and then someone can say You should definitely make something of it It is ridiculous that we have reached such a point that we can no longer just be sweet and kind are eh and that h responsible so eh if you see something beautiful Z in someone pronounce it give a compliment you can also say Den bij Yes the coffee is laou I really enjoyed it with the coffee was laauw don’t do it nega B go just about the lukewarm coffee that wasn’t like that Hi there Yes but you get it I mean choose the positive side guys eh Everyone tries to make the best of it and finally if that is the case eh because I know that a quarter of the employees so people with work who struggle to pay their bills and 4 percent can no longer pay their bills while you are just working, so for a whole lot of people this is a challenge I also heard you say about the challenge of that if that is the case I can not solving it, what I do know is that it helps, that is also what the Budget Coach always does, isn’t it, a Gaal or someone else, is to create order, imagine you have debts and a plan is made and it takes 5 years before you finish Era, but you know that you have a [ __ ] that it is manageable, then you no longer care about those six years, then you think, I’ll see, every month I do my thing and after 5 years I’m done with it. That gives peace of mind so create more peace and overview, create space And overcapacity for now and if something goes wrong, thank you [Applause] Thank you. Does anyone have any questions? Does anyone want to say something about this presentation? Well, I thought it was great, then eh point É eh J I don’t think so, but I did, but that was quite an opening, but remember that yes, you say yes, yes, as often as you can, yes. Do you wheel that? Yes, but I don’t think so either. Yes, and definitely say yes to yes, I eh. Now turn now too, right? things like that are right and yes, um, everyone knows he heard it, so I said, h said, yes, I said it as often as possible, in other words, it is indeed good that you notice that, and because sometimes people also have difficulty saying no, yes. say eh so I mean it mainly h there are also a lot of people who say against everything who do not limit themselves in that I mean it mainly for you are right when it comes to what can I handle What are my limits that is very important to not to be noted that is a good point Yes yes or did you still have one ehm Klin and Theo Do you have any questions Yes I have a microphone let me come to you Karin thank you I now know why I am so happy but I think all the points what J has been doing for a few years and eh I hope everyone zz because it is very important that you are back and eh very often also when I give a presentation And I also say Oh I can’t see it whether I am good and real v yes if you can be and look happy feel good there is Mind through which you can thank you my story would be that I was lucky when we met somewhere group of eh think of the moment what happens um in a in a set something like this um they met each other and from that moment on yes we actually do everything together and um we found a connection on eh on the theme of entrepreneurship entrepreneurship in the sense that we keep doing things and it is indeed almost the whole journey um Yes that ensures that ensures eh eh yes I must say returns that eh have nothing to do with concrete things but that are really in our relationship and they also have nothing to do with falling in love or anything else It is together recognize steps and then act Yes and that is only possible if you make contact with each other and that is what I liked about the person who uh just stepped up to me at the front because I am only a man behad together with you Here and he immediately makes Wen and he immediately makes contact and that is the most important step you have to take of course and that’s where you find it and that’s why Evel beautiful I meet you very often how you people said about together how are you there Yes Park isel you have together um my The answer to that is if you and your partner, because that is what we often aim for together, you both feel that you have that together, then there is nothing wrong with saying get together, but if I have to give a black and white answer then I won’t surprise you when I say you have Parkinson’s only H from the yellow van you have to get off the wheel yourself of your er bus and er in the preliminary conversation we talk about it together here I talked about it for a moment and then you also said, um, yes, I think it’s so nice that I don’t necessarily want to burden my partner with the fact that I have Parkinson’s, so I’m not going to play the victim. We have him together because then I’m going to hang out with you. I don’t want that and you as a partner don’t want that and that is the best so in the end the answer is of course talk about it with each other whether you want one thing or the other and it is important that you coordinate this with each other but if you were to ask me I would say you can also Can alone That’s not what it means from suit Z together with you. I don’t think it is meant from the moment I get the diagnosis and then hey, that’s what Lee says, that happens differently and I remain the same and even with me outside cat irritating press but they are a bit no behind every joke D is a good one that you say this what did she say I am that irritating personality on the inside language love language is important Be careful with the words chooses words very strictly I think I’m going with humor in the meantime, but what I wanted to make clear is that his life is definitely different because I Park Yes, so you have it together Yes, I park him for a while because I’m going to continue for a while eh and noter on you, but more in general eh, I hear it said a few times, if you listen to it carefully again in the video, you can say the brain doesn’t know the word, so when you say to yourself I shouldn’t be hard on myself Hey the brain is strict because the brain does not think if you tell a child don’t fall what happens then the person who falls falls so tells the child stay standing stay standing so be careful with the words choose always try to choose the positive variant that in the meantime your foot, even if it is a joke, the neural network is being constructed and because the neural network was constructed I once was at Poter’s, it was beautiful because yes it is a slightly different full But yes I don’t know I have to think about it now it was a uh a course and uh that was a boy Everyone has to introduce themselves and he said it he said to us uh I really love my wife but in such a way that I thought it was a bit strange and I really love my wife Okay well course eventually he freaked out in the group for something completely different then I knew VI days later I went to the course I got a call I don’t know I got work then you think he was his vag to me you probably don’t know how his wife something or how can I divorce How can I divorce or his wife something or about his wife something Yes I think he says I love I do that his wife who loves him or if so that could also be me yes oh yes But now you’re getting a little closer Do you know what it was Shall we meet together I say yes, but you B still faithful, more so Love Yes, but I also like boys very much, shall we meet in Dunkirk Paris Rotterdam halfway I don’t know if I gave any signals that boys are okay, I like it when people are No, I told you and that was just me, it was nice that he had agreed with her that they were together, but that he could also meet a man, that was fine. What matters to me is that you send the signal GG to yourself when you say it that way that it is not okay if you have to emphasize that you love someone, that is what it is about, so borders are important, choose the positive variant instead of the negative variant because you just feels in your brain without meaning that with a negative one now back to you about together and only what I mean is the following I sometimes ask that question from the beginning a Quadrant eh then I sometimes ask the question um are you responsible for the happiness of your life partner regardless of the part apart from just in general you are responsible for the happiness of your life ne no some say yes I can make it even more complicated are you of words for guk of your children well from that eh like I said, I said, but when I ask the question you influence the happiness of do you influence the happiness of children completely yes So as long as that is clear you are with vend it does not really matter what you choose you do not make it so that you can make the other person responsible for your life because otherwise that’s a tricky man, let me put it this way if the other person wants that, that’s fine, right, that you have influence on each other and that you take each other into account and all those things, that’s all true, but ultimately responsibility. We come alone, go G for everyone it still applies to all of us that the meaning is that you are together how do you say that that is that you are together and that is always the other person’s Yes, but that is then you are together that says nothing about being happy with each other or or that was completely out of the question everything but the reality is that it has consequences for you how you live your life I have a trauma from my childhood it also has consequences for my life exactly So if I get fired, that also conse as my child in other words then you can Then you always live it together Yes, if you are depressed then that has an influence. Hey, that also has an influence. Yes, an influence, but it comes with responsibility. Yes, yes, but you can do that. I mean, it really is a good way, that’s how I look at it. Yes, I think so. important, a lecture par and a partner has to deal with all Len who comes together with me but in essence she does not know what it is because it does not eat it So you do not have it together Serve and eh I think it is very important to to say because uh who are you going to connect with to uh yes to have paron together and uhm we had such an event where we had to have each other very important because we sometimes say we are each other’s informal care to a large extent we play ping pong Around the World and uh during that ping pong holiday our partners also got a bit of Zen from us and so we actually help each other uh to have together with the two of us with the four of us with six Kart and that’s something very different from knowing together what it is Yes, that’s why um it’s like that B I don’t in the parallel eh with the concept of happiness eh what’s the name of J Janneke Janneke interpret those singing differently than let me say the most and and that’s why it’s so important that you with each other before you go, isn’t that me What are we talking about here is happiness When I say I think Happiness is Very important And you or someone’s concept is oh yes then I will definitely just have to stand on the table dancing all day Well there If I don’t say yes then I don’t agree with it either But we have to talk about what do you mean you interpret differently but I always have the danger that others will interpret it differently and that’s fine and I don’t but so it’s very important with each other What do you mean And what do I do because then it is often closer together because then at first I think it brings me Thank you for the tip on informal care what I do know And have not yet told, research has also been done into happiness of informal caregivers and It really shows beyond doubt that the happiness of life quality of life is lower than that of informal caregiving and you can also do that eh that example has helped me I come before I come to happiness I come from meaning and meaning then I became happy and for a long time I thought what is the difference between meaning and meaning and happiness until I realized you can live a life full of meaning and meaning and still not be happy and actually the informal caregiver is there an example of eh, because it gives a lot of meaning to life and meaning to life, but they have not chosen it, right? Because then a profession comes your way and you do it with love and pleasure, but not entirely voluntarily choice Even if you could say you can already do it and do it, that’s another discussion But it turns out not to be an Irish case and finally yes, as one other Example of what might be something in Youth Care, so people who work in youth care score very high on meaning and meaning gid and yet they score very low, especially in job satisfaction, because the system that we have created together around mental illnesses is so complicated that their influence on the result and what they want because they practice that profession does not get off the ground at all. The system is completely stuck and so you get frustration, etc. So they are two different things that are a bit I work in youth care myself, we have to e. I notice that I think about that for a moment, but that depends very much on what you focus on and where you focus. explains and I just teach the others eh, you shouldn’t set the standard so high and just see those very beautiful little things as an eh well something beautiful and something Yes, you actually already apply those tips. I hope that you and your colleagues will all know how to inspire because you naturally want everyone to look at it differently and then you come across what story are you making ? Yes, but I would like to thank you very much for this beautiful yes Z beautiful lecture Yes and eh yes of course I still have some DJ Sor eh then I want I would also like to highlight Monique THS because she has written a very nice book, but I have not read it myself yet. So I will explain that and they will give you that today, thank you very much. I have had it for a year now. Partners also wanted to use it. of this very beautiful day eh that is eh organized so eh I have made eh A number of books available eh I am someone who likes lists and guidance and I missed a practical summary of what is going to happen with part and I already had wrote a number of books so I started writing I have listed all the symptoms and told you where they come from and what you can do um if there was I hope there are many people with that for you [Applause] have another nice piece make chocolate nice that you were there let people still be there who have questions that eh just put them to me Look we can give up on that for sure Thank you so much It was an honor to be able to speak to you eh eh good luck good luck but above all try to enjoy the things that are there as much as possible and create the story that helps you now Karin and Theo will come to [Music] for oh Well come Well thank you I don’t have much to add because the program was very clear I think and have also been sitting for a very long time actually not too long eh eh keep it but eh For those who don’t know me we know All and we are eh got to know each other at the op of a sports group and um mind the introduction iset so I will still Let’s do it, er, we exercise, so a group of 25 people in that Noen you and eh, that has become a Verstoep and we exercise four times a week, so Exercise is paramount. We have also set up the mental, er, say Maarn contact, so that is yes. own connection factor but eh Theo and I are also entrepreneurs ourselves and eh we both have our own business and entrepreneurship also connects us and we are happy that we always share the story because Z presentations about Parkinson’s and I understand the people who don’t have Parkinson’s very often they think that you actually can’t do one of them I go to work and eh yes it’s my own B and eh um well I have a company I had the company personnel business with the A service er employers dad on the other side there those are the employees and then we created Ving Switch and that company and we now help people uh from the moment you uh the diagnosis until uh the end with all the [ __ ] That’s not So uh that’s my company and that also suits my skin situation yes pay [Music] is I want my own small example of myself eh with you Len that is so I have always worked very hard and my own business is 60 70 nothing then I got Parkinson’s and Then I did it for 10 years, yes, I made myself very unimportant within the business, then I thought, well , I can do it anyway, I’m just going to solo and then I’ll spend a few hours, eh, and yes, I thought that ‘s fine with me. I can do it, but that really doesn’t work. Because in the Netherlands it is true that I am not actually allowed to work because I am ill, yes and that was such a strange arrangement for me. For example, I saw a vacancy at a very large department store and I thought Well then I’ll go Da D morning 4 o’clock couple morning work at zar o’clock I can do that and then I’ll go eh yes buy coats that was on fire that was really in for months I thought it was done sister had a very nice conversation and eh yes I said who was and experience what I wanted to do and feeling demands and then also said Yes and p it Z to then eh you are not allowed to work It was so strange to me that I thought Is there anything that can be done about it at all Why am I not allowed to work yes if you can’t work later come and ent after being sick then you will receive benefits after that Well I don’t have any benefits So there is no problem And if I don’t come then I have to pay that’s right Helal but but that’s not possible Well and so it said to me Well indeed that’s right because that’s how regs are, you are indeed not allowed to work and I thought that was Yes, a very typical eh eh garing Z That’s what I’m going to do myself as a business, so I’m eh myself eh eh I’m writing a book from my in the stomach with all my experiences that I have experienced, written and I now give many presentations together about all kinds of matters such as Dutch affairs and perhaps what exactly to do . nuancing in a technical sense make it work of course but somewhere there on É of the CH it also said culture reality and in reality we reject people in theory it is possible in practice you cannot get through that first blockage is allowed Say yes yes I am lucky, I have different experience, I am not already an employer, I also have Ael Tijat Yes and that was No exactly, but then you have already taken action. I wanted to tell me one of the things, but that is not possible in terms of how you actually do it. can find positive examples because they can be found everywhere, but in general terms, most people who come just come in in the culture problem and that turns out to be a problem to solve my own company, 12 people are now working, z people are disabled and we just see what they can get they get a delusion we go to work and we are the same successful So it is possible It is possible but very often you run into Yes against uh against a Tom wall look so that’s why it’s a Hul here too So we both have different stories and yes, maybe I myself, but of course it also depends on what kind of work you do and what kind of work you do, but in general you often see that employers are buzzing about people with an a eh people with a limitation or distance, there is work, but I myself am still e is very often when you say yes, I participate at the G St knows how eh eh but yes I am I work at the house eh and eh yes I am actually always a lot I have been open about the eh and I just spelled cards and said, well yes indeed in the back hall maybe it will be said Well sorry then eh then D I don’t do that But yes G very positive and you then do eh discrimination there and that’s great super I also don’t care about money, eh, but I’m all about luck because I still want to be worth it and I still want to do something, so it’s more important, eh, well, I think that Look, it’s fantastic that you have found, but if you look at the broad outlines, then the health insurer system is You actually have three types of categories, you have, say, curative, in other words, someone who is sick, we are going to make them better, eh, you have preventive, we are going to prevent someone from getting better, eh but you also have amplition, that’s called amplition and that means we’re going to look at whether someone can do it and from there we’re going to reason, so it’s curative and the entire healthcare system is focused on that, the entire medical system and all health insurers, that’s where the revenue model is based, that’s all labels, but also adad PDD NOS parking, all kinds of things, we can do something with that, so if care is preventive, it’s about how can we keep balance, eh, but amplification is about the starting point What can we do? It’s nice that the GP thought this way, but the system and that’s what I think also what you mean is aimed at the fact that it is not possible, don’t let it hold you back and just go, do your own thing, as you do. And you also believe in energy, so where the energy goes, second thing I wanted to say briefly, eh, amplitude thinking is that we no longer talk about disabled but about Different so there too language and words Think about the words you are not incapacitated so we just have to remove that term from the vocabulary You are incapacitated for work just in a different way and that is amplified thinking but I think the reason why you say that is because the entire system is not aimed at that, regardless of Parkinson’s, let’s say what the other problem is that actually plays out in between is that Paron is chronically productive. It is very often, eh, you see that there is enough room to arrange it once but in six months or so your uh limitation or symptoms have increased then you may have to adjust again and again and there is just a uh kind of fatigue uh factor in War where you often think Oh there it is again and somewhere on a At some point, erm, it cannot arise and then you have to be very alert because it is known that at least that is my experience, we have had about 350 people visit us in the last six years, and it is still relatively easy to install the first time, but to then adjust it again and adjust it again If, for example, Yes yes there are people eh from 50 pack Miss then 15 years wer or some 177 and how to maintain that with resilience and you also talked about that and that is perhaps even more difficult because then you live the change and you first have to recognize it, discuss it, you have to process it, then you have to say goodbye to things in order to accept a new reality and that is quite quite difficult and ti and most people can do that and neither can I, not only I would like to add something to that, um, what I really see in the world par is the person who is very enthusiastic with passion, scamming someone somewhere who can do that for a very long time, um, that’s what you call it I am one who eh still eh like you eh yes eh very much eh can I notice it in myself for the things I do that I eat myself a lot but I am in I am of course also I am from myself eh belong and I can divide my time and I can do the things that I like and that I want to do and I don’t have to take a boss into account and that makes a big difference. Yes, it is very good to keep doing things. that you that you Yes that make you happy on my way through all the things I have done um well yes of course I have a new lection organize this event for the second time um for that I meet more and more people eh I get a lot more stipulation I now also have connections abroad and that all comes my way because I am active myself, but I also show positivity, which means that you get things back that I want that, eh yes, I want to pass along I would like to walk by. questions Oh yes yes yes but I just wanted to pass this along because I think quite the way I see it is I think it is a very V It is very important to indicate this uh because I also meet more people who uh positivity is important keep it very short because we have to move towards the We have to move There is always a negative attitude when you have been rejected I have been rejected for 100 PR but so I called neatly and you say I am seriously writing via the corner but I am being That’s all taken into account, P a little bit per month. I’m allowed €150 above what I get and I can keep it and the rest will just be paid. That gives me a good feeling and I think the question works, yes, it’s small. No more reading. and I try to do as much as possible, but it is serious work, but I have just completed the profession of yes, I was rejected 100 percent, not even 99, you have to hold back a little 100, but it feels good to me It feels good to me what is very good is that you can still be busy. Yes, I agree with you that you are doing something that makes you happy. You just have to keep doing things that you like and that you want to be able to do, of course, but look for the things that you want to be able to do and make it happen. just make it nice for yourself but we have to stop now because Hans Come forward and say Hello Hans and how nice that you are here, we are going to move so nicely Hans and are like eh eh here some people express this k IND eh last year War also had a buck had training this year we are going to do something different magtel itself but okay Well uh that ‘s okay to say uh we’re going outside soon uh I think Z SW we’re going to have some uh little Bre activity about 10 minutes I’m going to put you there I just feel la Oh okay, you can set it up again, yes, it doesn’t matter, eh, just keep them both away from you for a while, I have to ask for a sandwich for what do you want? Yes, then you can concentrate now, yes, now eh, we have to, yes, look Okay maybe eh come tight tight Yes Well J likes to keep in touch live in Ving Oh I turn off I turn off the computer because we are going to do exercise exercises outside and also Do what yes should I take my computer No you have to go outside yourself yes oh yes, go outside, get some exercise, nice jaan, yes, um, I don’t know who else was in there, maybe hard, yes