💛 London Cycling While I Try to Read Chat in AR Glasses 💛 Brand New IRL Set-Up

💛 London Cycling While I Try to Read Chat in AR Glasses 💛 Brand New IRL Set-Up

[Music] Hi everyone. Welcome in. How are you doing? What’s up? Good morning. So, we’re back again. We are back again and we’re trying this again. Hello Greg. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. Hi. I can see chat. You’re all good. We’re back again. We’re going to try this again. take I’m in the middle of the street. Yes. Um we’ve got a brand new IRL set up. So this time I think this will actually work. So we have come back to um there’s a pub over there. You know how the end of our stream recap for all of y’all. The end of last stream was that stream kept cutting out. Think kept shutting off at home. Mics kept crackling. IRL pro kept being weird. I don’t even know. The love you solo rather kept being weird. I don’t even know. We cut all of that out and started again and got a brand new like completely redone with a screwdriver, a completely new IRL setup and everything. Flash forward a few weeks, the end of last stream. The end of last stream, we kind of [ __ ] it all up after our seventh massive crash. And then I said, “All right, I’m going to go. [ __ ] it. I’m going to go to the pub.” There’s the pub. We came back to the exact place I said we would. I said we would. We came back to the exact same place that we ended up last stream and we’re going to resume and this time it’s happening. I said we would and I did. You’re calling a screwdriver. Your mother. Your mother. So, we’re ready to go. But first of all, before I get on the bike and become slightly more hazardous to society. Uh, how are you guys doing? What’s up? Good. Continue safe out. Genuinely, that was my I’m so pleased cuz so often I say, “Guys, I’m going to do this thing.” And then I just don’t. Which is why I’ve stopped saying that. I say, “Wow, wouldn’t it be so amazing if I did this thing?” I don’t say I’m going to do this thing because I probably won’t. But this but this time I did. [ __ ] you all. We’re here. We’re back. We’re as Justin Bieber says, we’re standing on business and you don’t even know. All right, let’s go. It’s a bit too loud, actually. All right. Um, how do I use this? I don’t remember. Scary. Scary. Scary. These are These Oh [ __ ] What are they called again? I completely forgot the glasses. AR Solos G1 Echo. Even reality’s G1. Thank you so much. That’s what it is. Okay, I’m going to keep you tiny. It’s on my screen so I can just check that that’s going strong. And then I’m going to put the trail over here. And the trail, as you can see, ma maybe you can see. Don’t worry. It’s like riding a bike. Surely surely is straight straight ahead. Straight ahead. We’re going to do some standing on business. I keep saying that. I don’t know why. All right. Like to meet you. Ready? Cameraman. Ready? Yeah. Let’s go. Remember, I ding twice if you need to check if chat has not chat. Sorry, T. I ding twice if you need to check if if stream is crashed again. Okay, and we’re off. Oh my god, that scared the crap out of me. Why did you I thought that was you. I thought that was freedom. We should get off the pavement, shouldn’t we? Actually, yeah, we should get off the pave. Should we do that first? Why are we on the pavement? Very good question. Oh, she’s running for the bus. Okay, let’s get off. Let’s get off the I don’t want to I don’t want to ride on the road. It’s scary. Let’s get away from the Okay, here’s what we’re going to do. We’re going to walk to away from the bus stop. Um, and then we’re going to get on the road and then be normal bicycle people. Scary, scary, scary. I really don’t want to die. I’m not a confident cyclist. Oh, cyclist is the right word. Let’s go. Let’s try. All right, we’ve come to some bridge. We can continue from here. All righty. [Music] Ready? Cool. Okay, Joel’s in the chat. Hopefully I don’t die. I’m Oh, Jesus Christ. [Music] All right, clear. All good. Is there a bicycle lane? No, not here. Annoyingly, this is the only part of my like travels that I’ve or the route that I’ve planned that is like scary scary bike don’t go here. Um, unfortunately it’s quite a long part. So, you’re coming right in the the right right at the crux of the drama basically. There are lots of cyclists around here though. Like, it is an expected thing. I’m going to try and keep like go price low. cuz there’s so many bumps and things. I have no idea. I because I don’t drive a car and I’ve like I’ve never done any sort of car driving stuff. Oh, we’re turning up there. Oh jeez. Uh let’s go to the crossing. I would just do a left turn here, but let’s not do that. cuz I literally I don’t know who has right of way. I’m not confident that I know what that means. I don’t know if I have right of way. Oh, there’s a cycle lane. Wow. Isn’t that lovely? Can I Can I Can I go out? Hold up. Hold up. I’m just going to wait here. I want to cross the road. Um, clearly the way Yeah, I think that’s a good a good idea. probably. [Music] Yeah. vlog. We are the worst cyclists ever. We suck. We’re back on the pavement again. [Applause] Oh, thanks for the resub. I don’t know what you’re supposed to do. I’ve only ever been a walking pedestrian. I don’t want to do that. I don’t want to cut across traffic like that. What am I? Some kind of kamicazi? No. We did it. We made it. Yay. Okay, here’s the next segment of our adventure. [ __ ] me. No, I didn’t take a wrong turn. Stop it. Straight line. Straight line. should be simple. Yeah. Yay. Okay. I’m glad that we’re off like the main road, though. That was scary. Cool, cool, cool, cool, cool. And there’s a school here. Oh, wait, Clay. There’s a school here. K your head. You’re not allowed to be within 10 meters. Cuz he’s a pedal. That’s a joke. It’s a joke. is that he he touches kids. Sorry, this is way more. Oh, okay. Apart from that, you ding. You dinged twice. Oh, was that an accidental ding? Okay, we have a twice ding rule since last time cuz Pluto kept dinging accidentally. Causing plan stops. unplanned stops like this and um so therefore we have now decided that it’s a two ding only rule to mitigate I’m going to wait for this car. I don’t give a [ __ ] I don’t give a [ __ ] Okay. Okay. What are you doing? You’re the worst cyclist ever. Yeah, I know. I know. Okay. I know. And what? You look like clowns right now. Okay. Did someone say kids? Crazy. What’s happening about X F beam right actually crazy crazy stuff crazy shenanigans shenan people this is actually delightful these houses are these houses are nice do you think we could ever afford a house like this no I don’t think so either no do you think we could ever afford a house like Well, you didn’t have to laugh. The laughter was quite a lot. Sharp left. Wait, that’s a private road. Can we cycle along the private road? Yeah, [ __ ] it. [ __ ] it. Why not? [ __ ] it. What are you going to do? Sue me? Oh, I live in a private residence area. [ __ ] you. Am I pregnant? Nice and I don’t want to touch the public cuz I’m allergic to the public. Come on. Get across the railway. Okay. So, I planned this route myself. Yeah. How the [ __ ] What do you mean? Cycle part. Should we give it a go? Should we try and cycle this? There’s a massive fuckle fence at the end that that woman could believe it. Nah, no, no, no. Pretty though. Absolutely not. I’m not playing these games. I am. How are you doing? Oh, chat. Because I’m lazy. Um, and I’m going to need it for later. If there’s ever Oh. Oh. Um, okay. Most viewed clip from today’s stream gets VIP for a year, for a month, like a regular VIP. Okay, that would help me out. It would also help me out specifically if those clips involve uh cycling and reading Chad nail glasses. Thank you so much. Thank you. You get Do you want Is that something that you want? VIP. Yeah. Does taking the bike on the train count as going for a cycle? Yes, it does. I didn’t say I was riding the bike. I said I was walking my bike. I’m walking my bike today. This way. Come on. See where that big red bus is? We’re going to aim for that. Yeah. If you can stack so close to it that you get propelled up to the second story, then you get bonus points. Let’s go. Happy London day. Oh, I feel so so I understand why people cycle. Man, this is delightful. This is a delightful situation. Is standing in the middle of the road part of today’s itinerary quite a few times. Yes, we’ve scheduled that in quite a lot. Prepare for more of those. standing looking semi afraid and worried in the middle of the road. It’s going to be something you’re going to see a lot of. I hope you’re you’re buckled in for that. Bicycle park. I kind of want to do my due diligence. Do my due diligence. What’s the word? I want to do my good service to the people. and be the sort of cyclist that really tests drivers skills. Like, are you really paying attention? You should be. Let’s find out who swerve into traffic. Do you know what I mean? Okay, we want to cross over. And then we want to go Holy [ __ ] I don’t know. We want to cross the road. There’s a crossing here. Amazing. And it’s green. Fantastic. Just [ __ ] [ __ ] go. We’re [ __ ] doing it. Yeah, that’s right. It’s happening. It’s happen. It’s happening. That’s the decisions that I made. Oh, Jesus Christ. Oh my god. I did it. Was that confident enough for you? Was that confident? Cle said that I was a dangerous cyclist last time cuz I wasn’t confident enough. But I think that was a fairly decisive course of action. Whether or not it was a good course of action is another question. Is it just me or do these big houses like on the side kind of look like the the child keeping factories from Tracy Da? What are they called? You know where kids don’t have parents anymore and they go and they live. Foster homes, but not foster homes. Not foster parents. Child houses. Abortion houses. No. anti-abortion houses should have been aborted but weren’t. What are they called? The No, I’m not saying they should have been. I’m just saying like as in their parents couldn’t have the houses where the kids go. What houses? You know the houses where the kids like Okay, so kids get fostered. Yes. Orphanages, I guess. But that sounds very Victorian. Does anyone say orphanages anymore? Chat hold. Where the [ __ ] are we? Oh yeah. Cool. Cool. Easy peasy. Look at this bike lane. I mean, the diet culture in this country is absolutely abominable. What are you telling me to not do? I was Oh, sorry. I was checking the route. Clem. I wasn’t just randomly talking. His mom had so many Yeah, diet culture is disgusting. I’m just saying that before. Think thin ladies in London. Yeah, cuz the bike path was narrow. Did you see the narrow narrow bike path? Please don’t hit me. Please don’t hit me. Thank you. Please. Please. be pleased. The fun thing about cycling that as well that I’m learning is that you’re trusting cars to just not hit you like quite a lot. Like that’s most of it. Just please don’t do that. This is all in your hands. Your hands in God’s hands. Not definitely not my hands. My actions have nothing to do with it whatsoever. I’m just floating along doing my thing. Why are you holding back for a car like that? Cuz we’re not very confident. Flice. We’re not very confident. Frankly, I’m holding back for, you know, everything. Oh, there’s another one. Clean them. Duck your head. I’m holding back for literally everything. H. Okay. Check your check your six. I’m checking this is the right way cuz this is shady. Get it? Cuz there’s shade. Oh, I’m not happy with this. Come on. Get under the bridge. Hopefully we don’t lose you under here. I don’t think we will. Oh, I went the wrong way. I knew it. I knew this felt wrong. Okay, we’re turning. We’re turning. We’re turning. So wrong. Tang. Oh, this this is incredibly wrong. It’s okay. Okay, we’ll do Is there any reason you’re not indicating? Cuz if I let go, I will fall over. If I let go of just one hand, I will fall over. Um, and that’s worse. Yeah, the GPS says we’re very not on the right path. We’re just going to do a little leaf around here, I guess. Guys, we’re taking the scenic route. It’s okay. Clem also, I don’t know if Clem can hear me from here. And also Cleveland doesn’t have to route. So as far as he knows, this was completely planned and we’re going to keep it that way. Okay, chat. No one’s going to tell the cameraman. No one is going to tell the cameraman that I made a wrong turn. I don’t know where I’m going. Are you? Are you? No, you’re not good. Chad, that’s so evil. I just want him to be impressed by me. That’s all. I want him to think, “Wow, this is such a complicated, twisty, turdy path that she’s memorized all by herself.” Okay, we got to we got to go left. This feels the same, though. This feels like the same Wait, wait, I missed the turning again. How? There was no turning. Am I tripping? Okay, we go up here. There was no turning. Was there a turning on the left? No. All right, we we’re kind of closer. We’re still not on path, but we’re getting closer to the mark. I guess we’re making progress. So, it’s it’s all right. Oh gosh. What do I do? What do I do? What do I do? What do I do? I do what that what that coach didn’t do. And then we Easy. And then if I just take a slight wiggle here, then we should be on path again. And no one’s the wiser. Not a single person is any the wiser. Yeah, there we go. See? Simple. This is where it was meant to be the whole the whole night. Easy peasy. The GPS had a bit too much to drink today. Exactly. Yeah, it was. I was following him perfectly, but the map went squiffy. It’s not my fault. I assume we go over the bridge. I don’t know. I’ve lost I’ve lost my map. I need to redo I need to redo my map. I’m sorry. [Applause] What? Okay. Cross the bridge. Uh oh. And then we’re on the river. Yay. Look. Then we’re on the river and we’re going to start seeing some touristy [ __ ] Wait, does that come with me? Oh, but it doesn’t actually move though, is the thing. Oh, there’s a button. Do you know I wondered why they didn’t have that feature cuz I thought that was like a really important feature to have and I was confused that the app didn’t have that feature. Oh, also while we’ve stopped, I need shades. I can’t see you. It’s too bright out here. Can’t see a single [ __ ] Can you put these on me? These I really need you to put them on. I can’t see what I’m doing. Oh, I think I got one side. Yes. From this stream of this stream. I don’t want to wait. Come by. Sorry. Can you Can you please Thank you so much. You made that look so easy. So easy. Cuz you’ve got the gift. You’ve got the magic. Cleon went to school training to do that. You took a special module and putting clip on shades. You whistled. No, you didn’t. Okay, that makes sense. Guys, look. River. Wow. Everyone say wow. Wow. He can do anything. He’s an engineer, right? Did you know? Did you know that Cleon was an engineer and therefore he can do anything? He’s trained in all of the skills. He’s trained in tech and befriending animals. They’re really making it tricky, aren’t they? Okay, cool. Oh my god, my GPS is coming with me now. That’s crazy. I don’t have to keep stopping and moving it cuz that doesn’t that doesn’t make sense like as a feature. No, I agree. No, I totally agree. Doesn’t make sense that that wouldn’t have that function. How many engineers do we have in chat? Ones in chat. If you’re an engineer, come on. I know there’s a lot of you. Yeah, there you go. And is it true? Is it true that engineers can do anything? I heard they’re basically wizards. You can be like, “Hey, figure out how to this how this [ __ ] works.” You put one slash two. What does that mean? Oh, we need to turn up there. Um, okay. Follow my lead. Don’t freak out. I missed my turn again. Follow. No. No. In front of the truck. Hold on. Hold on. Hold on. Hold on. Follow. Follow. Follow. Follow the lead. Follow. I accidentally went up here. I didn’t mean to. I meant to be on the road. It was an accident. It was an accident. Hold on. Hold on. Follow my lead. Follow my lead. Follow my lead. We’re going to figure this out. It’s going to be okay. This is why I don’t drive, by the way. Well, there’s a lot of reasons why I don’t drive. Um, we got there. Sorry. Sorry. Oh my god. I forgot you can’t hear me. I must look crazy. I didn’t stop. I turned. I didn’t bash in in front of the lady. You bashed in front of the lady. That wasn’t me. You should be more aware of your surroundings. Honestly, we’re not going to die. I would like I would like the cars to go away. Can you make them go away? You’re an engineer. You can do anything. Basically a wizard. Can you tell them to stop? Okay. See, now we go. Yeah. But this time we don’t miss our turning. Okay. And we go up here. And then boom, shaka. pretend that my app my trail app is um leaving it’s tracking where I’ve been. So, it’s leaving a trail behind to show where I’ve been. It’s going to be so [ __ ] funny. Chat, the detours are going to be I’ve already got like six different loops where there’s no trail. Okay, guys. The river. Look. Wow. Okay, now you can actually say wow. See, I was going to cut across here, but then why do they do this? Why is there so much hostile engineering in this place? Wow, it’s London. It’s a weird part of London. We’re going to go central London. Don’t worry. It’s part of the part of the trail. We’re starting in the back end of London. It’s a weird business boy part of London that no one really cares about. But if we follow the river, eventually it’ll take us to, you know, royal [ __ ] Wow. Oh. Oh, this is the end of the river walk for us, actually. Well, we’ll see the river again. Enjoy it now while it lasts. It’s going away very quickly. Very soon. We have to turn back in. Enjoy it. Stop fairy doing Perry things. I think so. I think so. It’s hostile to Perry. Everyone say bye to the river. Bye, Rivere. Bye, River. Do you know what’s also fun is that I have a lot of faith. Oh, sorry, sorry, sorry. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. I hit a man. Oh god. Just go. Just go. Just go quicker. Go quicker. Go quicker. Escape. Escape. Escape. Escape. Okay. Is he okay? I was I was breaking. I just didn’t break strong enough. I didn’t break quickly enough. Terrorism. Is that what that is? I in my defense. No one was looking my should have dinged. Oh, that’s what the bell is for. That’s what the bell is for. I’m learning. I’m learning on the job. You know, you have a bell, too. Back there. You’re only like 2 minutes behind me. You had a bell as well. Oh, guys, look. We’re back on the river. Oh, and we can go down here. And I think this is safer. Avoid the family of children. And now it’s now it’s safer, safer, safer, safer, safer. Yay. Oh, I hope that man was okay. He just seems surprised more than anything else. It It was like I barely grazed him. Um I apologize so much. I feel so bad. I think he’s a gay dick. I didn’t stop though. I didn’t stop to check he was okay. Does that make me bad? Oh, Clem, I [ __ ] it. Cle, I [ __ ] up. I [ __ ] up. Oh god. Why is this so heavy? Excuse me. Excuse me. I’ve been training for this. I’ve been doing ass at the gym. Okay. Okay. Momentum is key. There we go. Call me a physicist. I’m going to I’m going to hit like seven other people. I can’t do this. I can’t. Okay. Okay. Let’s reassess the safety tools. Brakes require more force than the force I applied. Bell sounds like this. And that is useful to alert the oncomers. I’m just now I want to go down the middle. I want to go through the middle cuz that seems too tricky for my bank skills. But there are those that people with the baby standing right there. So I don’t know. Frankie, I don’t know what to do. You know what this is like? It’s like a game. He used the belt. They did not move though. Wait, the possibility of them not moving upon hearing the bell didn’t cross my mind. You want me to go? Let’s wait for this guy. See what he does. Oh, he took the Well, he’s on a BMX. It’s a different different game. So, it’s okay. It was actually very easy. And they weren’t very close to the middle, so it’s okay. Yay. Baby Dodge Park. Genuinely, I feel like I’m in [ __ ] Baby Park. Like, feel like I didn’t know cycling through London would feel so much like Mario World. I didn’t realize that’s what it would be. Feel like I’m in the [ __ ] trenches. My bike is screaming at me and I don’t know why. I’m not I’m not sure why, but there we go. Are we ever going to show a chat to Batisy? Um, wait. Where am I going? I might be going too badly now. I think that Wait, it’s better. It’s better to see where the go stuff was. I think so. I think that’s where we’re going. Yeah, I think that’s literally we’re going. Behold boat. This is St. Mary’s Wadssworth beer. Clem. Who was Mary Wodsworth? Child. Child. Child. Child. trial. And we did not kill it. Let’s go. Pogers. Pogers. Pogers. Brace yourself. I love hearing it a couple seconds behind me cuz I go through it and then you go through it. Ch a couple seconds later. It’s so funny. Wow. Oh, what a beautiful day. What a beautiful river. What What interesting architectural marvels? Yes, we’re going to Balaci. There’s signs for Balacy. I think we’re in Balac. Are we in Balaci? Is that why you asking? Are you like, can you show us around? Is that what you mean? Who said the stuff about Batsy? I only see the most the recent three messages in these glasses. So if I skip context um just know it would have been yes good time for bell good belling good belling sir [Music] shot right [Music] I’m I think we’re near about to see [Music] okay you want to Come out. [Music] Yeah. Um, okay. So, that’s closed. We had to go left there. But I guess we’re going right now. [Music] H. [Music] Okay. Interesting. [Music] Um. Ah. I think we can go back up here. Yes. Maybe, maybe, maybe, maybe, maybe, maybe maybe, maybe. Or we going to a hotel. Who can say? Uh, what do you think? Why? Ow. Okay, let’s see what’s up. How low is the helicopter? It’s landing. It landed over there. I’ve got sea river spray on my face. Uh, it says to left. Yes, I didn’t make up that sign. Okay, cool. Yeah. Yeah, you can see the you can see the blades of it. The blades of air moving through that. It landed. Do you think that’s why the foot path was closed? That’s pretty cool. Okay, onward. We made it back. Tiny detail. Tiny tiny tiny detail. It sounds super close. It’s there. It’s landed. It’s right there. Yeah. Don’t throw it. Pass it gently. Boring. Get to the chapa. Get to the chap. So this is somewhere potentially near Batis. I don’t know. Somewhere between Putney and Badi maybe. I think this is definitely the temps. Um, enjoy. Have a good pumpkin. Excuse me. Lime bike. The weather’s like 25° in sunny apparently today. 25° and sunny. But it doesn’t feel that hot. Look at all the boats. Isn’t it lovely? Isn’t it delightful? There’s a factory there with two chimneys. I bet they make a lot of waste and I enjoy that. Not bad. Ready? Sharp right. I also almost missed this. [Music] Okay, we want to go left along here. All right, cool. I’m a good cyclist. I’m a good cycle person. Okay, we want to we want to go down here. Charlie, no. I’m not going to go. There was a car. We were turning, darling. Screaming at me to go. Just Why would you break? Wait, did you take life insurance out on me? That’s the only way that makes sense. Did you take life insurance out on me? [Music] Hello. He did. He took life and very go by [ __ ] Do you want me to announce our turns? What if I use my little fingies like this? Does that work for you? Can you see that? Seriously, I felt like I fall off. Genuinely, I know that for a fact. I’m not being dramatic. I am not strong. Turning [Music] to wait for the car. Yep. Oh, thank you. Thanks. Second prison. You have things to say. But I stopped there before I turned. It’s okay to stop before I turn. How do I signal without falling off the bike? I I can’t do that. I’ll fall off the bike. I’m a hazard. No Perry was capable of cycling. I’m capable of cycling this the same way you’re capable of spelling my name quicker. Hi Daddy. How are you doing? What’s up? All right, let’s go. That’s the Hey, that’s the car that stopped for us that almost hit me. Do you remember? A memories. Very stressful actually. I am a major hazard. Yeah, you’re the reason car people hate us. Well, how else am I supposed to learn if not by doing I what I mean to say is I’m sorry and you’re right. Okay, I’ll try signaling next time. I wish there was like a button I could press that pops out a little flag. Do you know what I mean? Wouldn’t that be great? Have I just come up with an innovative solution that I could sell? Hi Vicki, how are you doing? You stay clear of London roads. Yeah, me too. Yeah. Okay. Yeah, I would as well. I’m not enjoying it. I am I am enjoying this. It’s thrilling. Frankly, it’s thrilling. I don’t think this would be that scary for if someone was like good at cycling or knew what right of way meant. But, uh, it’s thrilling for me. I don’t know what’s going on. And I’m I’ve got you know when you go to the zoo and you see mir cats being afraid of all the loud noises and they keep like like crouching under sand and rocks and things. That’s me right now. Threats on all sides. Why am I swaying so much? Because of my fat cake. Can’t help it. I went to the gym once in the last week and ah now I’m just it’s either that or my massive tit. Either way and also cuz I’m having a jolly time. One of those three things. This isn’t a good advert for lime. Well, I’m not wanted by lime. They should make their bikes less heavy. Then I wouldn’t have that issue. But I’ll bear in mind that maybe I don’t ever take like a like a line bike sponsorship. Okay. Focus up. Focus up. Focus up. Focus up. Focus up. Focus up. Okay. Are they [ __ ] to ride? They’re really fun once you’re on them, but they’re really heavy to the point that I don’t think I can signal and I have to put the seat way lower than it is cuz I can’t hold myself up on one foot. But if you’re not like me and you actually have some muscle mass, then you’ll probably be fine. Oh, wait. Oh, I’m going the wrong way again. That’s okay. Um, okay. What do I do here? You’re stopping with the wrong choice based on your face. Okay, it worked out though. Okay. Um, I’m going the wrong way. We need to We need to turn right. Which means we should probably wait at these lights, I guess. Should we wait at the lights? I don’t know. Is that Is are we supposed It’s It’s not No, we’ve got turning. We You never know when we’re turning. Oh, signal for you. Like Like you’re some kind of princess. Okay. Okay. Now I believe we’re on the wrong side of the road. So, we just need to curl over. Okay. Yeah. And again, no one tell him that that was all because I made a wrong turn. We keep that a secret. He doesn’t need to know this. [Music] You’re in a blind spot. You’re in their blind spot a lot. Do you know what, man? I don’t even know what that means. Do you see that, chat? Do you see where we are? Do you see where we are? Oh [ __ ] Oh [ __ ] Oh [ __ ] Oh [ __ ] Oh [ __ ] Oh [ __ ] We’re at Body Park. I cannot wait to get into Bady Park. I don’t want to be on the road anymore. It’s a very stressful situation. Very, very stressful. What did I do? I’m sorry. What did I do? What did I do? I didn’t want to crash into the dog. Park, do you see you? You’re not going to die. It’s going to be okay. Everything’s going to be fine. Who will be? If we survive this, I’ll buy you something. Something pretty. You too, chat. I break cheek clean. Now, what does that mean? Are we going to sit through that gate? Yeah. Fantasy park. Let’s go. And now we’re free rain. The only thing we will hit is the the only thing we’ll hit now is kids, not cars. Yeah. Oh, thank God. Tiny reprieve before we jump back out onto London streets again. Teeny tiny little reprieve. Oh, this way. My bad. Change of mind. I’m stressing him out so much. And it’s so funny. Every single time I make a sharp turn, I hear his anxiety. Oh, I went the wrong way, too. Oh. Oh. Well, it looks busy. This way’s nicer. Hello. Say hello. Clem. What’s that? I see. Cleop. Circus. Circus. Pepper. Circus. Pepper. Circus. Circus. Jesus [ __ ] Christ. Now that mother belongs in jail. I done been dinging my bell and like just just nothing. Just nothing. We’re really off path, by the way. But I just want to see what this is. No one’s in there, so I think it’s closed. But are they packing up? I’m just trying to figure out what the circus circus. Oh, it’s not even circus. It’s a bag round. Wow. Oh, but they’re packing up. Or are they setting up? See, that’s the important distinction. Are they setting up or are they packing up? Cle, are they setting or packing? Oi, I guess we could Google this. Do you think they’re setting up or packing up? [Applause] I can’t tell. I think they’re packing up, aren’t they? God damn it. And the day is ruined. Um, okay. I don’t know where we are anymore. I went really far away. I’m going to be honest. Like really far away. Like this is not at all slight even slightly my route. Um, signal. Was that good? I try to be elegant. I think it’s important to be demure and mind mindful when lion biking. Does Perry see the road and the chat? Is it safe? It’s definitely safe. You guys are not like blocking my vision. I have to look at you specifically to see you if that makes sense. But you’re always there, but it’s not obstructing my vision. Um, you’re really far away, if that makes sense. I have to focus on you. Um, which I don’t do if I’m in a tricky spot. It’s a little bit risky because I’m not very good at cycling, but I’m trying my best not being safe. Don’t worry. Oh my god, we’re going to die. Hold on. [Applause] Oh, checked. Break checked clean. That’s what that meant. Like checking your brakes to see if they’re working cuz if they weren’t, we would have had a collision. Did you check your brakes before we left? Now, which way is Oh, okay. We’re actually exactly back on path accidentally. I mean on purpose. 100% on purpose. We’re back on path completely. That’s what I meant to do. You feel in danger. I’m sorry. I might want to get an easier what strap? Armstrap. What arm strap? I’m I’m reading chat and AR glasses. See the glasses on my face? I have 2020 vision. They’re They’re not for aesthetics. Not to brag or anything. Oh, wait. I’m in the wrong place again. Oh, but look how pretty. Wow. It’s a garden. They hosted the Formula E here a few years back. That’s fun. Oh, I mean we probably should have turned there, but too late. Too late. Do you know what we should do? We should go. We should go all the way around. Let’s go all the way around cuz I don’t want to I don’t want to make another route, another path, and go back and blah blah blah. H. Left or right? Flip a coin. You go right. I’m having the best time. I am having the most delightful day. Where the [ __ ] are we? It’s a very good question. A garden in the middle of park. What the hell would they think of next? Okay, you think this? [Music] You double beep. Are you asking where the [ __ ] we are? because I made a a weird I’m sorry. So, the green is where we were supposed to go and the blue is where I went. Oh, wait. We have to go this way. It doesn’t tell me which direction the green goes. So, I just thought we were meant to go that way, but we came from that way. So, we need to go that way. We should go back. Really? We should just go back. Sorry. Should we get a jogger? Actually, we’re only about to see. We’ve got to make it to the pub. It’s really far away. Okay, come on. Back we go. Back we go. Get out of my sight then. You’re kind of in the way. I’m going to lie. God, you’re kind of in the way. Um, I feel unsafe. I would like to make this turn without the people. Just do it. You say just do it and then I get in a little bit of a crashant and then we’re cooked, aren’t we? I did ding. I’m just going to say that. Going to say that for free. I definitely dinged. Okay, forward. I’m going to be really careful now. Really careful. We’re making the right choices only. Okay. Watch that metal thing. Okay. Okay. Correct paths only. No more messing about. The bell isn’t very helpful when everyone’s wearing earphones. I know. No one can [ __ ] hear me. Wa. It’s a lake. Wow. Keep your dog on a lead. He’s on a bike. Get it? Cuz he’s a dog. Cuz he Cuz he fs. cuz he’s a cool man who gets a lot of [ __ ] Okay. And if we if we if we make a sexy naughty little right turn here, we should be back on track. And we are. Isn’t that Well, we’re kind of kind of on track. Sort of kind of. We should be able to get ourselves Oh, Jesus. Back on track at some point. land. See, that was supposed to be my right turn, but I think not. Let’s stay on this. Oh, actually, that would have been better that way. It doesn’t matter. It’s It comes back. [ __ ] off, Magpie. Seeing only a one magpie means you’re going to die alone. I heard something like that. I need to tap the recenter button. Oh, sorry. I just need to tap the re recenter button. Wait, where are we? Oh, we need to go. I We’re going We’re going more in the right direction than we were. There’s no need to yell. No need. No need. I’m trying my best. Okay. I’m not very good at this. God damn it. So mean. Isn’t he being mean and unreasonable? C. I think he’s being mean and unreasonable. I usually do set the GPS to follow me, but if I zoom out or anything manually, it undoes that and I forgot to take it again. Okay. So, oh [ __ ] We’re good. We’re good. We’re good. And we’re back on track. We’re back on path. Yay. Now, no one can be mad at me anymore. Back on route, finally. The [ __ ] is this? [Applause] Uh, Chad, have we have we come across a kids concert? Cool. [Applause] [Music] [Music] What is this? [Applause] [Applause] Cool. It’s Greece. Yeah, they must be filming something. Oh, there they are at the front. Harry and Sally or whatever their names are. Cool. Sick. They must be filming something. We will have to Google. Can someone Google Barcy Park Grease filming? They might not know. Cool though. Big bump. Big bump. Big bump. Oh, stop time. Do you want to fill the water bottle? Nah. [ __ ] it. [Music] You do want to fill the water bottle. I knew it. There you go. Do it for me. I’m so far away. I couldn’t possibly. I’ve made so much distance traveled. Fine. Fine. Fine. Fine. Fine. Excuse me. Could you watch my phone though? Thanks. Bump me. Yeah. [Music] There is a no cycle sign. Really? Was that really? [Music] There was a cycle somewhere. [Music] Let me go check that actually. It’s quite far away. [Music] Was there an earth cycle sign? They’re not for here. Okay. I’m going to have that grease song in my head all day. Was there a no cycle sign for this part? Oh, we [ __ ] up. Okay, back we go. Drink your water, hydrate, and let’s head out. So, we can if we go up this way, then we can go that way. I mean, we’re like so close, though. Do you think we should walk it? No. We’re so close to like the next part. Isn’t that fun? Bad is a pretty cool place. There’s always stuff going on. Thanks, Grace. Walking in a park. I know. What am I? Some kind of plebeian? Don’t walk places. I glide. Darlings. Shim. Sh. Putting a no cycle sign here is crazy. Did you know? I was just in front of the ball games. [ __ ] it. [ __ ] it. Honestly, [ __ ] it. Who’s going to like Who’s going to be like, “Oh, you were cycling in a park.” Oh, no. Do you think we should go? Are you approving of my brazen brazen decision? My brazen law breaking? I’m a rule breaker. Oh my gosh, Jody, thank you so much for the ride. That’s so nice. How is your stream? What’s up? I’m cycling. I don’t think I’m supposed to be cycling here. I’m not confident, though. I’m not sure. It seems crazy cuz it’s a park, but here we go. Hi. How are you doing? What was your stream? What were you up to? Tell me your feelings and thoughts and what’s your deepest, darkest desire, ex, etc. You dinged. Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t realize you had the map on your phone. God damn it. Oh no, there is. See, I’m coming. Hello. Hi. Sorry. How was your How is your stream? You might have to spam me the answer to that cuz I can only see the top three messages in these glasses. You did good. I am doing well. I was telling Chad about your stream earlier, so I thought it’d be nice to pass them on to you. Oh, that’s so nice of you. Thank you. Oh, my cameraman’s celebrating that there’s a raid, but he’s doing it in a way that makes it seem like he wants to drink honeydew from like a straw or something. What does that mean? That’s the face you’re making. You’re going like suckling like honeysuckle. That’s the vibe. It’s the vibe that I’m thinking. Yeah, that’s the whole gimmick. We do random stuff outside in precarious situations such as London road cycling and skiing downhill and stuff like that while reading China AR glasses just to make it even more dangerous. That’s the that’s the point. That’s what we’re doing today. Um who [ __ ] raided? Um why don’t you ring to church? Nerdella raided. It’s very lovely. Cameraman says hi. Bloody hell. What a bloody headache that is. Okay. She says, “Much love, cameraman.” My goodness, honey sounds amazing. I used to suck the flowers in the school playground. We should have been more um supervised. Yes. Okay, so we are here. We’ve just come out of Bettery Park, which means we are now in the London London part of it. So, we ran through like the best place to cycle in London, which was just one big deer park. We saw a deer. Why are you I’m continuing an exposition. We saw a deer and then the stream crashed a bunch and we [ __ ] it all off and went to the pub. Now it’s day two and we picked up where we left off at the pub. We’ve come through baddesty park. We did some very precarious roads in the middle of [ __ ] off nowhere. Came to bad park and now there’s temps probably. And we’re going to be in London London Park. So we’re about to start see some actual tourist [ __ ] soon. Very soon. So, I say we go. No, no, no, no. You want to cross. You want to cross, remember? So, we should cross, shouldn’t we? Even though that’s not what my trail says. But no, seriously, assuming you have um some kind of magical map inside your head that you Sorry, guys, we’re having a bit of domestic. What are you going to do? Yeah, this way. Oh, on the road. Oh, for we are bikes. Yeah. So, we’d be on road. That makes sense, guys. I don’t drive. I’m only ever walking pedestrian. So, this is new. New for me. Wait, which side of the road do we have to be on? I don’t know where the cars are. Come on. Get in the road. Ow. Right time. Excuses. Shut the [ __ ] up. This stream’s so cool. Thank you so much. I I I like that it seems cool. I’m having a great time personally. But there it is. Did you ever manage to provoke him to a level where he accidentally spoke all the time? Actually, Chad, if you’re sat in quite a quiet room, you should be able to hear him. If you turn off all other noises, he has been fuming this entire time and speaking quite consistently under his breath. Mainly insults. Just so Just so you’re Oh, I shouldn’t have gone here. I shouldn’t have gone here. For instance, just then he said, “What the fuck?” Just for for a little for instance of the sorts of things you might hear if you listen really quietly. What do I do? There’s a bus in the way of where I need to cycle. What do I do? Sincere question. Ow. Sincere question. What do I do? Do I just wait? I assume you go up there where the bike sign is. Yo, I’m kind of cooked now to be fair. I’m downhill. I appreciated the the downhill life. Okay, we vibe. [Music] Good luck catching up the ne cameraman. I should probably wait for him for like the sake of the stream. Yeah. Wait, am I not supposed to be on the bridge? Wait, am I not supposed to be on the bridge? Oh, [ __ ] Am I not supposed No, I’m supposed to be on the bridge. I am. There are other bikes on the bridge. Yeah, we’re fine. I had a bit of a panic there. Goodness. There is a bike lane where where you’re riding. I Listen, there are other bikes. There are other bikes. It’s okay. It’s not just me. Help. I don’t think I’m supposed to be on the bridge. Whoops. Okay, cool. That was stressful. Pum help. You said be on the road. You said be on the road. So, I was on the road. You There was a cycle path. Yeah, I know. That’s why I chose this this route. I forgot that there’s supposed to be second part all the way along it. Yeah, it’s my bad. We’re going that way, but I needed a little break. I came to join you. Uh this way. Oh, it’s green. But this is not green. So we must wait. [Music] It was so angry. There were other bikes. It wasn’t. The cycle path was optional. You can take the danger route if you wanted. Maybe I’m just not a [ __ ] Maybe that’s what it is. This is exactly what I’m like driving in London. Never know what I’m doing. Oh, sweet Jesus. when I Oh, yeah. We should probably Good point. I am realizing probably too late. I should have realized this before. I am realizing Oh jeez. That people are people. Like I always thought, “Oh, no. Cars cars stay on the road. I can trust cars not to hit me. Oh, cyclists always seem to know what they’re doing. And I can trust cyclists not to like be weird about it. You know, we have to cross again. Um, but actually I’ve realized that these things are all operated by human beings who do not know what they’re doing. And actually, we’re all coming from Morgan though. [ __ ] go on the road. [ __ ] grandma save you. She’s dead. It’s just nice when it’s not me. Do you know what I mean? The roads in London are a minefield. Little bit. Little bit. Yes. I’m following the essence of Freedom’s disdain is currently what I’m doing. And it’s working out. [Music] Wait. Cycle path. Cycle. Cycle path. Blue. We must get on it. I don’t want to do the bump when I’m on the bike. So, I’m going to do the bump while I’m walking and then get on the bike. Yes. Yes. [Music] I’m going prick. Yay. Cycle. This is the CS8 route. Yay. Does this mean we’re not going to get hit? Wait, but there are two cycle routes now. There’s a left cycle route and then this cycle route. Is this for like speedy bikes? There’s different kinds of bikes. Is one better? They decided to do two in the same place for no reason. He’s zoom in. He’s got places to be. He knows what’s up. [Music] Okay, we want to keep going straight. So, like we want to I’m going to just follow the men. The men the men seem to know. That’s a red light. Are we allowed to cross red lights as bikes? Are we allowed to cross red lights? No. I don’t know where Zum is. Yeah. Do it and find out. I don’t know, man. Seems like Seems like we are. That guy did. I just followed cuz I’m, you know, screw the law. I feel like we weren’t supposed to cross red lights cuz I saw a lot of bikes waiting at red lights, but that just might be because they didn’t want to get hit. Look, River Chad, if you look to your right, you’ll see the River Temps. Ah, have you guys seen an Uber boat yet? You should have. There was one a little bit ago. My I have a friend whose brother His brother drives one of them zippers. 10 zipper Uber boat. That’s his whole job in that one. You can if you want to win the vehicle battle. Wait, did someone yell at me? Yeah. Was that you? I’m going to assume it was not clean. Yeah. Okay. He’s talking with me. Who called me a pa? Who did that? I didn’t hear anything. Nah. Yeah. Uber boat. 10 zippers. Exactly. Okay. Okay. Green means we can keep going. Oh, okay. This is a whole other level of challenge. These are kids on bikes. I use my I used my thingy. Good utilization of the bell. Run over the children cuz you want to be scared of bikes. You won’t be scared of kids. Kids on bikes. Hold on the wheelhouse. Honestly don’t even know what we’re doing at that point. This is nice. We do kind of want to turn into the boating the RAF boating base. Wait, no, we don’t. The hell is my map? Okay, I think we’re fine. I think we’re fine. We carry on because we could be we want to be by by the river basically. [Music] That’s like the goal here is to be on the river. So, maybe we can go into that park. I really don’t know. We’ll find a way. Are we allowed to cross red lights? I’m going to again I’m just going to follow this man. This man seems to know what he’s doing. He’s wearing one of those slingover bags like they do in that sexy law show. Yeah, we kind of want to get off the psychopath. Actually, we want to go down to the river for scenic views. But I miss a turning. Oh, there’s a pub, too. Let’s go. The famous RAF B. Boat base. RAF boat base. Um, I’m not seeing a good way to do it. Ooh, I was going to say smell that chat, but I’m going to say it anyway. Ooh, smell that chat. Sweet, sweet taste of fumes. This is nice. Is it her first time on a bicycle in about h eight years? Yeah. Don’t be read to me. We’re going to keep going straight. Could someone call me PA? Did you? Was it you? Oh, a man shouting at a bus. Oh, yeah. I saw that. Cuz it was a red light and the bus turned in as they were as like pedestrians were crossing and then a very angry Spanish man was like, or something quite rightly. [Music] Okay. Oh my god, this is a big Oh my [ __ ] god, this is a big big cross-section. I’m so scared. Okay, cool. That was a big open space, chat. Just like in Valerant, you want to avoid big open spaces and hug the walls. Same rules. Same rules. This lady seems nice. She seems like she knows what she’s doing. I’m going to follow her. She seems quite leisurely about things, you know, and that’s that’s what I’m looking for. Use alternative route, not land bridge. All right. Wait. [ __ ] Is that our bridge? That might be the bridge. They’ll be aware. Don’t kill camera boy. He’s okay. He’s going to be fine. Although to be fair, if camera boy does die, it’ll be sh the tape. It’s the tape. No, it’s not. What is this? The tape Britain. Am I tripping? I don’t remember there being a tape Britain. What is this? It’s art. Huh? [Music] British Museum. The Britain. Tape modern. Taint Britain. We’ve never been here. Oh my god. There’s a museum we’ve never been to. That’s crazy. We should go. I feel like we’ve been to all of them. We clearly haven’t. Wow. Yeah. I’ve only ever been to the other Ty, too. Maybe. Yeah. I was going to be like, maybe it’s new. This massive historical building. Maybe it’s new. Yeah, must be. Okay, let’s go. I want to ride my bike. We should cross actually. Should we cross? Okay, let me get Cle’s opinion, actually. Hey, Clem. Clem. Clem him. Clean him. Okay, so here’s a cycle route that’s like right along the river and looks really deliciously pleasant. And here’s us on the motorway. How? I was supposed to put us on there for like a while. We were supposed to be going somewhere really beautiful and scenic. Um, instead we’re inhaling bus fumes. So, do you have any plans here? There’s a marina there. Marina must go to river, you know. Feel like we could just cross. What do you think? [Music] You’re trying to find out the point at which I deviated. Yeah, it was that back at Banty Park. I I went the wrong way. Yeah. And now we’re now we’re in the mood away. [Music] I feel like we can just cross. Yeah, I think we can just go this way. But that says pier right there. Pier. Milback Colonium Pier. [Music] But there must be for it to be a pier, there has to be a a way for it to get to the water cuz it’s blue. It means you get a boat from there. So you have to boats don’t go on the road. [ __ ] idiot. Freaking [ __ ] [Music] Road from the pier. Oh, we’re crossing. I should focus. Okay, okay, okay. Nope. I’ll watch you. Seriously? No. I’m going to I’m good. I’m good. # free clean. Free clean from his stupidity. You’re going to die. You’re not going to die. Astro says you should give me the middle finger because I’ve been rude in all caps. Pier means water. Oh, that old lady smiled at me. See, she’s think we’re having a great time. Oh, wait. It’s quite quite high up, though. Is it like a pier for a ferry? Where’s the second bathroom? Where’s the Where’s the cycle path along the river? Apparently, we’re on it, mate. Okay. Where’s the cycle bar? Can you see down here? I’m too short. I can’t see. Is there Is it just water? [ __ ] Is it just water? Well, explain this map to me then. Wait, maybe it’s only available in low tide. [Music] Wait, no. Explain the map if it’s just water. Is it really? Yeah, that’s just that’s just what because look, I’m not crazy. Psychopath. Wait, green doesn’t mean psychopath. Green is my path. You want to go back on the blue? Psychopath is underwater. Low tide psychopath maybe. May maybe. All right, back we go. Why not have a cycle path in a in a low tide area? Not as your only cycle path, but as an additional one. Why not? I’m not going to make this turn. Hold on. I got to back up a little more. And then we got to No, you’re you’re you’re blocking me. Thank you. Thank you. Appreciate you. You’re doing a good job. Do you know I’m proud of everyone today. Everyone’s done a really good job. We found a art gallery we’ve never been to. Isn’t that fun? We found a circus. We saw some people filming some grease. [Music] streams are good, but Perry’s directions are not. No, I have I’m really bad at directions. I can’t do it. Even when I’m walking with Google Maps, I’m really really bad at directions. Unfortunat Unfortunately, Cleo has to be behind me for the whole camera situation. Um, so he’s given up the wheels as it were, um, to let me lead and it’s crushing him from the inside out. It’s crushing his soul. Usually cleans like lead the way. This is painful to watch because you lived a f you were where you lived. You lived a 5minute walk from where we currently are. Please back seating the IRL London bike stream. Thank you. We do not best. Did my bike Wait, what the [ __ ] Did my bike just stop? Yo, in the middle of the [ __ ] road. Jesus Christ. Our bikes just stopped in the middle of the road. Why? Okay, we got to reset. Got to reset. Got to reset. We got to got to pay for more minutes. That is nonsense. That is so funny. Line. We have ended this ride for you. I don’t know why they do that. Like I didn’t ask. We noticed that your ride was in progress for an unusually long time and ended it for your convenience. Lime bike sort it out. What do you mean? You didn’t park in a designated parking area on your last ride and now I’ve been charged £2 for parking violations. It stopped me in the middle of the road. Yes. Really? They charge me £2 for parking violations cuz Oh, you’re not supposed to park in the middle of the motorway. That is such [ __ ] fine. Fine. Jesus Christ. Oh, come on. There is it stopped my ride for me because I was riding for too long in the middle of the road and then charge me £2 cuz I didn’t park in a designated parking space. I swear to God. Come on. What on earth? Oh, wait. My phone’s in my pocket. Do you know what that means? Means I don’t know where the [ __ ] we’re going. Whoops. Uh, I’m going to go ahead and just stop here. No, not here. This is bad. Um, but this is parking. Oh, solo motorcycle only. What does that mean? I’m going to I’m going to I’m going to pull in to this little spot. Wheel. Put my phone in my pocket, didn’t I? up. So, you know, the route and such. Okay, guys. Can I just point out the distinct lack of tech difficulty? Hang. I don’t want to jinx anything, but let’s go. This is why I prefer docks. They’re just more fun, you know. But with the Temp’s River river boats, you’re kind of limited to the one path unfortunately. But you can go all the all the way across the country. Let’s go. The only take failing is the bloody bike. That was actually outrageous. I cannot believe it. I genuinely can’t believe it. That was really outrageous. Guys, we’re coming into fancy fancy places with with fancy tourist voice and stuff. Look. Look. I I’m not sure what that is, but it looks it’s gilded. It’s a gilded building. Are you seeing the gilded building? Is anyone did you whistle? I’m hallucinating. I’m going to wait for the bells. Look at this. On your left, you’ll see this fancy building, the temp’s house. And oh, holy [ __ ] Okay, I don’t know what what we’re doing. We’re not crossing any bridges. I’m going to follow this bike guy. I’m following the bike guy, but I’m not. I was following the bike guy, but he’s too confident. I don’t think I can replicate that level of confidence. We are just going straight. We’re just going straight. So, it’s going to be okay. What? What? No. Wait. Come on. Your WordPress cookie plugin docked you. I’m sorry. I I I’m not going to look at any of those if that helps. You can’t just paint a bike in the middle of the normal road. That’s what they’ve done. If you notice, they just put a bike in the middle of the normal road and called it a bike lane over there. Wow. Wait, where the [ __ ] are we? Where what what places are these? This seems familiar. Great Peter Street. Houses of Parliament. Parliament places, Parliament squares, Parliament Abbies, uh, Parliament. Oh, is that the House of Parliament? I think it is, actually. Let’s go. London. Okay, now we’re now we’re right in the center of it. Thank you for the bits. I appreciate you. Thank you. Thank you, [Applause] So, here is the Houses of Parliament. You can go in, they will check your bags. You can go in and just walk in at any time that you want. Um, and sometimes you can sit in for the debates that they have and watch white men screaming at each other. How’s the apartment? Pretty fun. Um, what else? I live here. I’ve lived in London my entire life. I really should know the shots of this stuff. Then there’s this building. I assume that’s still the House of Parliament, but like on the other side, the mirrored apartment. I don’t I don’t know. Is this the house of Yes, it is. Cromwell Green visitor entrance. And then we’ve got uh some flags up ahead are some flags. So, isn’t that isn’t that fun? It’s the London Eye. Big Ben. It’s Big Ben. I didn’t see Big Ben actually. I totally missed it. We got Big Ben. We got the hands of Par. We got London. All in one shebang just for you. Take a snapshot. Oh, Westminster Abby. I forgot. Oh, it’s a church in G. But this one is pretty cool. Big wheel. Wow. Uh, then you got some flags. Can’t remember what that’s about. Something political. That one looks fancy. That’s probably hotel if I’m being honest. I I don’t know. Um, we want to go forward and then turn down that. So, we should probably do that now. Ready? [Music] Why did you say no? Go around. I had to go around. It’s a round. It’s not a roundabout. This Oh, this whole thing is a roundabout. Not if you’re a pedestrian. And look, no, I know I’m a cyclist now, but look, pedestrian. I keep forgetting to think like a car. Do you know what it is? I’m thinking like a person. I keep forgetting I’m not a person. the car. Vroom vroom. I keep forgetting. Oh, that’s why you were screaming at me. What? I I was going to My instinct when you scream at me is to break, but I figured that would be even worse. So, I didn’t do that. I just got a job on and I’m not a person in a car. You’re a hazard is what you are. Yeah. True. True. Oh, well. Well, look, we got to go this way. Maybe I should switch to Google Maps cuz then it would tell me stuff like that instead of this weird route that I made myself. Do you know? Would that be helpful? Should I switch to Google Maps? The law The lawing shelter is torture. She’s a politically persecuted army veteran. Fact. Wait, what is politically persecuted? Army veteran fact. I just think they might be racist. That’s my thought. Honestly, I don’t know. I’m going to give it a Google. D E I M I. Can someone Google that? See what that means? I think they might be racist. politically persecuted. Uh yeah. Yeah. Yeah. This way towards the shard. Yeah, that’s a statue. Yeah, they’re outside a stat they’re sat in front of a statue of Churchill talking about how politically persecuted they are as white people. I Oh, maybe they’re anti-urch. Maybe. Maybe. Thank you for the bits. Thank you, Indiana. Maybe they’re anti- Churchill. That would be okay. Not #nomitable. I got a distinct pro-churchel vibe from the group though if I’m being honest. Distinct pro-churchel vibe. All right. Um, let’s go. Let’s cross this bridge and then I think it’s probably break time. I’m knackered. Very stressful. I’m very stressed out. I keep almost dying. Um, yeah, you but you keep almost dying as a consequence of me almost dying, you know. Don’t be so selfish. This is a walk of shame, isn’t it? Because I I ran over one way. Yeah. My bad. I smell fish and chips. Do you smell fish and chips? Holy [ __ ] that smells so good. Um, yeah, we should probably get back on the road, but it’s so busy. So much traffic. No, no, no. We’re signing. Uh, what do you want to do? Yeah. Well, you’re kind of in the way. I can’t make that. I can’t do that turn. I can’t do that turn. No. No. Back up. Back up. Back up. Back up. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. [Applause] Okay. On the road we go. Ready? Let’s do it. I’ve sat in traffic here so many times. It’s a horrible area. Horrible area. It’s nice if you have nothing to do and you’re like just a pedestrian. Okay. It’s stressful. I think I did. I almost died again this time. I don’t I don’t know. Oh, there are kids in the cycle lane. Thank you. Respectfully, [ __ ] off cuz I’m not in control. I do not have control over this. But guys, look how beautiful. Wow. I’m so nervous. Cool. That bell. I tried I tried my best. I’m trying not to hit anyone. I’m trying not to get myself or anyone else murdered. That’s my number one and only objective of the entire stream today. Jesus. Jesus [ __ ] Christ. What you just witnessed there was an incredibly insecure woman uh who probably sucks as a human being. I don’t know what she’s saying. She’s screaming in Italian, but she walked out into the cycle lane. Someone grabbed her back and now she’s yelling at everyone. I’m just taking this second to Wait, when did we cross the second bridge? Uh Okay. Um, okay. Um, okay. Okay. Hope hope with me. Help’s wrong with me. Stay strong. Stay strong. Stay strong. Does it say bikes or no bikes? It says bikes. Good. Okay. Okay. Okay. Buckle in. Buckle in. Okay. And there’s a bike lane here. And then Jesus Christ. Wow. She looks so pretty. So pretty. Such a pretty girl. Um, okay. I’m going to be honest. I have no idea where we are or where we’re going. I need to go back. But back wasn’t an option. Um, this is kind of right. I guess I need to stop. But I don’t If I stop’s going to yell at me. Well, I just want to stop here. I’ll stop somewhere somewhere else. It all came out. So, I kind of accidentally crossed the river when we weren’t supposed to cross the river. And now I’m trying to get us back. See, I did a good job. Look, that’s nice. Oh [ __ ] Do you want to take a stop and go to Sunn Letters? Two cocktails. Oh, there. Oh, we got to go. We got to go. We got to go. be I don’t know when it happened. I don’t know how it happened. Go on the wheel. Apparently, it’s terrible. I’ve never actually been on the wheel. Apparently, it’s really bad. Okay. Huh? Okay. So, what if we’re here? Doesn’t really matter which side of the river we we ride along, does it? This is a nice ide we need to make this turning here cuz there’s a path. See, we’re close. We’re quite close to the to our destination. So, if we carry here on, there’s a cycle lane here and we can just keep riding along the river until we get to South Bank Bridge. So, not the first bridge, but the second bridge. We want to go to Waterl cross water bridge if we can go back. Do you think? Okay. Well, let’s carry on. Enjoy the cycle path and then go that way. And then it’s new. Yeah. So, we want to go up here and then Okay, let’s do it. Cheese. Yeah. Yeah, we have to pay these boats, but I got a pass, so it’s cheaper. Oh jeez. Okay, let’s go. Um, what’s a good way of doing this? I guess just like going up where that family is. I guess. Yeah. Yeah, we can go up here. Do you want to wake up early? Yes. But honestly fair like cool but nah we’re not there yet. We’re not packing it in yet. It doesn’t matter which way I go around the block. I think a bit left or right on the same block. Why does it matter? Let’s go. It’s technically a leg day. See, that would bring me great comfort except for the fact that this is an electric bike and I’m barely pushing. [Music] Okay, I’m going to really focus up now. Except I need to click the recenter button and I didn’t. I’m just going to do that. I don’t care if he’s mad at me. Okay, let’s do it. Okay, and we’re going to turn I just don’t know like how do I get through here? Like what the you know I guess walking I guess walking. Ow. [Music] We need to cross this bridge. We’re supposed to cross this bridge to the bush, please. [Music] You don’t need to cross the road. Okay. I dress honestly I dress in this are one way they go. Oh yeah. Yeah, that makes sense. Do you need a break? I need a break. Unfortunately, the only thing around here is a hospital. Do you want to go check get checked out? Yeah. Get a little tiny little colonoscopy for a little breather. Cool. Good. Yeah, good cool crossing the bridge. Crisscrossing the road. Very good. Cool. Okay, let’s go. Watch for a what? Huh? I think we’re going over. There’s some more souvenirs over here. How you doing, chat? Popping into the sea life center that is near here. I think it’s like near like around this area. So many tourists. I know. I know. I know. I wouldn’t say most of tourists actually. I think most people are working bees. You’re enjoying the camp. Okay, that’s good. Okay, let’s do it. Just want to see what I think I know where I’m going. think belt time. Yeah, I think so. My hands like on the bell. They just do not look when they cross. I know that’s ironic coming from me cuz I’m clearly not the most what’s the word? Did you see him say something earlier? He he done been talking. He’s been talking this whole time. I know. I know. It’s amazing. He used to not have a tongue, but it’s growing back. It’s just a teeny tiny little little knob in the back of his throat now. And sometimes it makes some sounds. It’s coming on. It’s coming on quickly. Okay. At the end of this bridge, we want to turn right. Big Ben. Get it? So, it’s a it’s a quote. And there’s a specific bike cycle lane that is for turning right. So that’s fun. [Music] I I’m I’m not sure where where to go from here, so I don’t want to go until I know. I guess just follow them. Okay, fine. [Music] Oh, it’s a two-way bike lane. This is so cute. It’s like we have an entire little road all to ourselves. It’s adorable. Amazing. Look at us go. Women’s suffrage freedom speaking. You spent so many hours sitting on this road. Oh no. Get the tube, man. Why are you driving in London? It’s not worth it. It’s not. At least you have a radio and you have some air conditioning in your car, I guess. But she was insanely warm. Yeah, to be fair nowadays it is. I mean because of summer lines aren’t too bad. I was on the district line today. It’s not too bad. Um Okay, I think we can just keep following this. The woman in the velvet batwing dress in front of me is mesmerizing. Oh my god. And she’s got little gold green cowboy boots. I can’t I’m just going to keep following her forever. No, we had like a whole thing we were doing chat. I’m going to [ __ ] it off and just follow the lady. See where she goes. Wait, is that creepy? Yes, that’s creepy. That’s creepy behavior. Very learning stalking. You’re right. It does. I thought it had a name. I thought it had a name and that’s what the name was. You left pleed. Wait, where’s Cle? Oh, [Music] they said I left you. I went through a red light. Oh my god. I’m not cut out for this, man. I’m so not cut out for this. I didn’t even notice. Oh god. And let’s just We’re so close. Let’s just get to our destination. Did I really? I don’t even remember there being a road that I cross of people. Oh, that’s fine. The people weren’t walking. All the people were looking at me and none of the people were walking yet. So, I cycled. That’s not the craziest thing. The bottle will be part of the trial when the copers get you. Guys, I don’t drive a car. Thank heavens. Thank heavens I don’t drive a car. This is the [ __ ] reason. Uh yeah, we’re kind of on the payment now. Let’s go back. Oh, this guy’s coming quite fast. So, I’m going to wait for him. And now we go. Let’s do it. We’re so close. Do you think we Do you think we can make it? I think we can make it. embracing the cyclist spirit when we’re so close to the pub or the I crossed the red line and didn’t even notice. Luckily, it wasn’t like I don’t think I was close to injuring anyone. God, I need to pay more attention. I’m trying. I’m trying. It wasn’t even cuz I was reading chat. I wasn’t looking at you guys. This is just me. It’s green for bike. Okay, I’m really locking in now and I’m not going very fast. So, worst case scenario, someone stepped out in front of me. I’m really not going very fast. I think everyone will be okay. So, it’s all good. The pub reward is really Yeah, the pub reward is really coming in touch for my my menty age currently. Come on, let’s get points. It really is keeping me going. That guy is so cool. He’s too cool for me. Too cool. This is so nice. Oh, you can see the walkie-talkie. Got a very, very shiny building. The one that looks like a walkie-talkie off in the distance in front of me on the right if you guys are interested. I might this might be my first overtake of the day. But I kind of I’m going to overtake actually. She’s not going slow enough that overtaking seems reasonable. The car just went past you by a million. Wow. We’re in the presence of legends and people with lots of money who can buy cars. Okay. Green for cycle. Amazing. Easy, easy, peasy. [Music] Oh, garden room. This is a thing. So, if you look to your left, oh, and you’re right. There’s a picture coming up on my right as well. These are the dragons. They’re like English lion dragons or something. I don’t know. Very nationalistic, patriotic, patriotic or whatever. But on our left, this building that’s all fancy and stuff is the gun room. And they do a bunch of different stuff. It’s not the name of the building. I think I forgotten the name of the building, but they do like uh Oh, it’s Summer House is the name of the building. I’m pretty sure I think Summer House and they do um um movies outside and the and the warm nights and stuff like that. Ain’t that cool? It was a bush. The fancy fancy go. Yeah, I in London you’re going to get a lot of people with obscene low like blood boiling obscene low. I don’t think I crossed the red light that time. Let’s go. And we are following these people which is nice. We’re going straight. So I don’t think we’re Yeah, we’re going straight. We’re not turning. Cool. Yeah, we’re free. [Music] Wait, if we’re turning in, do you know what that means? Then there’s only one possible reason we’d be turning in away from the river. Now, if you look at the buildings around here, they look quite old, don’t they? This street is literally called Tuda Street. Hold on, let me focus. Oh, cycle lane. It said cycle lane. Close used rise. There’s a bike right there. Maybe it’s just the cycle lane that’s closed, but we can still go up there. Or maybe it’s one way now. I don’t know. Oh, wait. There’s no bikes. No bike. Uh yeah, if we just go that way and then go out the next one. It’s actually the same like distance wise. It’s fine. But Chad, there’s only one reason we’d be turning in away from the river. What reason would that be? One re potential reason is river flies. They get you, especially when the sun goes down. But the other reason, oh jeez, it’s not how you’re supposed because on this next street we are coming to the oldest pub maybe in London maybe called Y old Chesher cheese or something. Is that you? There are too many bikes. I have no idea if the bells are you. What if you just scream oi instead? Then I’ll be able to like know that it’s your tone of voice. Ah, less likely, I reckon. Less likely. All right, back we go. These bikes is I hate how heavy these bikes are. I literally can’t maneuver them at all. My god. Okay. Uh I guess next road we can go up this. Oh yeah, Dorset Rise. This isn’t Dorset Rise. The next one is Dorset Rise. We go to Dorset Rise. Next road. Yay. My ass is beginning to itch. [Music] Okay, next road. Here she is. The faced the forbidden doors rides. Wow, [Applause] there’s a shirtless man running. Oh, he’s not shirtless. very confused about that. I don’t know what he’s saying. I know he’s speaking English, but I don’t know what I can learn. I like it. That’s why I’m copying it. We get to the top of Dorset rise. And then we give a little a little left turn. Then, oh then, and only then running. Can I try it for that? Why run? Mike. Okay. I have no idea. I [ __ ] guess. Jesus. Okay. Ah, there it is. Y cheshure cheese right next to the preto mon. Wow, it’s the pub. But we need to place a bit of bikes. Uh so I’m going to keep cycling. Well, I do not know. Wow, isn’t that cool? We found it. Did you see it? Um, okay. We need to just like We did it. Hey, it’s over there. But we need a place to put our bikes. So, now we just uh thingy. Get your Oh, I got it. Don’t worry. Don’t you stress, Lime? Tell me where to put you. If it’s Uhoh. But there are so many line bikes. Okay, there’s one up there. Let’s do it. [Music] Um yeah. Yeah. going. We just dump them in a random place. What? No. Is that what most people do? God, the world these days is so aborted in here. Really? Did you see a bird? Did Am I dripping? That’s just through a building. Is there another like a different parking? Yeah. Okay, we can go up shoe lane. Beautiful shoe lane, which is not this one, [Music] but it is this one. Oh, I believe. H. Oh, [ __ ] Sorry. Footpath ahead closed. Why is everything closed? Okay, we have to put our bikes. We found the pup. Oh, it’s St. Paul’s up ahead, by the way, if you’re interested. Right right directly ahead of us. We found the pub, but we now need to find a place to put our line bikes. Um, okay. What? Oh [ __ ] Oh, right. What I Is this a [Music] I’m Hi. I know, but if you go where I went, I found a parking spot. Okay. Any thought Yeah. Let’s get going back. We did not move that far. Okay. Hi. So, I don’t think I understand roads. But I didn’t stop. I didn’t just break. So, you know, little winds, little winds. overall. Right, let’s jump these bad boys. Um, and then pub, you look like you’re sweating, not from the heat, but from anxiety. How’s your heart rate? Okay. What’s the predominant emotion? Are you like anxious or angry? What’s or beused? There’s a lot of beusement going on. Shock and free. You’re shocked and afraid. You’re shocked at my incompetence and afraid at what that might mean for you. Mhm. Mhm. Okay. How do I get rid of them? You need to get rid of yours, too. And ride. Show you parked neatly. [Music] There you go. It said great parking. Yay. Yay. We have traveled 25 km in total. Didn’t need to. My route was only 15, but we did 25. Take a picture of it in the river. Great parking. Yeah, we kind of put it here taking up an entire run for the other bikes when there was a big cycle higher section. Oh well, who needs it? An extra 10 km. Do you want to see our map? Do you want to see the final map? I’m scared. I’m really scared. So, um Okay, this is where we started and we went in there and then came all the way back. This is cuz we were having issues in that park. So, we tried to go by the road. Okay, that wasn’t that was a planned detour. That was an accidental detour. That was a planned detour. And then we go down here. Okay, I made a little [ __ ] up. Um, I actually don’t know how this is possible cuz weren’t we down here at this point? Oh, wait, wait. What? How do we do both of these roots? Yeah. And then I had another little [ __ ] up and then and then this happened. Um, yes. And then this was mostly fine. This was fine. Something occurred. Something. Okay. But then we got back on track and this is this is fine again. And now it’s parking time. I’m Yay. It was a 15 km walk. Uh 15 km um cycle. We did it in 25. And it took us Oh, wait. I left the app on. According to the app, it took us 7 and 1 half hours, but I don’t think that’s accurate. So, cool. Success. Nicely done. See, the app said nicely done. Distance 50 km. That’s not true. 7 and 1 half hours. 311 elevation. Isn’t that fun? Two hours base of stream. No, no, no. That’s two hours today. DSG. Two hours today. We did half of it or a different stream. Mission passed. Didn’t die. Let’s go. Actually phenomenal. I’m proud of us. Yay. I’m on 15%. Charge me. And I’m going to take the gloss off cuz my eyes are sweaty. Sweaty sweaty. Now we get our reward. We are going or we parked somewhat near. We were supposed to be parked nearer but um but I but I messed up. [Music] You have a lot of a lot of dirt on your forehead. Wait, I was passing you this. Why did you hand me something? Oh, I see. Thank you. [Music] I’ll take these back from you in a second. I just want to clear out the basket. Yeah. Do I have dirt on my forehead, too? What? It’s a big black line. Oh no. When was the last time we washed these? [Music] Okay. Wasp. Wasp. Wasp. Oh, that’s a big boy. Big yellow boy. Excuse me. I just want the Excuse me. I just I would like these and then you can have it. Okay. Do you want to take your helmet back? Now to the oldest pub maybe in London. It’s contested. There’s a bunch of potential pubs that could be the oldest pub. Um, [Music] but this one is thought of generally to be the oldest pub, so that’s fine. No, that was ages ago. Don’t worry. [Music] The wasp was so easil eager to use the bike. Well, to be fair, we were [ __ ] lingering, weren’t we? God for the next person. Do I still have a line in my hand? I don’t know. Your friend’s discovering it. Now you’re all good. So there’s a couple pubs that could be the oldest pub. I don’t remember the name of any of the other ones. But this one is Y old Cheshure Cheese and it was founded in 16 something something maybe or 18 something 16 something 1867. Let’s say that let’s let’s say 1867. I guess it’s quite recent. Yeah. Yeah. But there were a lot of fires and [ __ ] Do you know what I mean? Like the steel standing. [Music] Maybe it’s not 1867. It’s quite new, really. Come on. I might be wrong. I might be wrong. Wait, I didn’t go that far, chat. We don’t have to get the tube to the pub. I didn’t go that far. Sometimes so difficult. What will you drink? Good question. I need something to erase the memory of how often we almost died. How are you feeling? You feeling a little little shell shocked? He’s looking a little shell shocked. Walking a lot straighter than usual. It was when you said, Perry, you just ran a red light. And I had literally no idea what you were talking about or any recollection of there even being a road, let alone a light, let alone a red one. That that for me was quite overwhelming as an emotional experience. I’m glad that it’s over. Now we get our reward. This is what it’s all been for. Cycling to the You know where it is, right? Oh, I was following you. How am I still the one bleeding you? Please, please, because you’re a cameraman and I’m incompetent. What else? Okay. Yeah, I did actually cycle quite a lot. Come on, let’s go. What? It’s all been for. Do you want to pack it in and just have a drink here? No, no, no, no. Come on. Last stretch. Last stretch. Is it that I’ve seen some [ __ ] expression? That’s exactly how I would describe it. It’s the You know what it is? It’s the as soon as the camera’s off, I am going to insult my girlfriend expression. I’m going to tear her apart. You guys are keeping me Yeah. Yeah. It’s that he has some jokes he wants to make at my expense. expression. Just make him, bro. Just make him. Play with your ch and then left and then we should know where we are. Okay, cool. The day before one is born is ancient history. I don’t know. I don’t think it’s 1867 cuz that is quite recent for the oldest pub in London. It’s pretty recent. So, it’s not in a very nice area. Like, it’s not bad. It’s a bit business boy, though. Do you know what I mean? Like, this is where I’d expect to see a Pratt and an its maybe one of those weird fruit salad bowl places. Not Not the oldest pub. Who wants to have an oldest pub experience here? Or is it just more of a testament that it survived? Oh, look. Brutalism. That’s you people’s stuff. Engineers. That’s what you would You would make the whole world look like that if you could. One big concrete concrete vlog. That’s what you like. Wait. Cuz we’re people now, not not cars. We were cars. Now we’re people. That was actually genuinely my first experience not being a person. Do you know what I mean? I know it wasn’t your first experience cuz you did it in Rhode Island. That was my first experience not being a person. I was a car for the first time. Wow. This is weird. You’ve got like seven different genres occurring. There’s like a gilded lion on top of that. A really old cathedral, whatever that is, skyline, buildings, 60s brutalism, business boy, all in one. I’m wondering, this is crazy. What era is this? If this was a landscape for like an anime or a show, I’d be like, pick a [ __ ] genre. I’d be very confused. H I can’t do this anymore. We’re going the wrong way. We can go this way. This is not for me. This is I am not a navigator. I listen. Okay, I know that you’re like overwhelmed by my incompetence, but I genuinely don’t understand how this happens. I don’t understand how this keeps happening. Oh, dear. What do you have story? No, I don’t recall what DV story you’re talking about. Okay. You guys do DV at school. It’s cuz they don’t want to redesign the buildings. Yeah. Like to be fair, what I want them to do, knock them all down when they pick a new genre. No. It’s quite cool. Each building is from a different era. Historical has multiple meanings. Okay, we should know where we are now. We should be able to see it. That’s on the bar. No Italian restaurant and St. Paul’s in case y’all were wondering. Is that St. Paul’s? Yeah, St. Paul’s. Fun fact about St. Paul’s. Um, Clem left his PE kit in front of St. Paul’s one time and the Metropolitan issued a bomb warning and it was a whole thing. to see you at a bus stop right in front of the [ __ ] St. Paul’s Cathedral. Oh, they were on your ass. Everyone thought they were going to die. They trying to assassinate trying to assassinate the queen or something like that guy. If you could assassinate one political me member in the UK, which one would you assassinate? Don’t answer that. I’m just joking. It’s a hypothetical. [Music] You did silver. Why? I needed bronze. Okay, we’re almost there. Can I only pick one? You can’t. You’re not allowed to pick any zero. There it is. He chest cheese. Yeah, that’s the name. I didn’t choose the name. It’s the oldest pub in London, allegedly. Genuinely, you can Google it. This is the oldest pub. I don’t think it’s 1867, but that really is a it’s a number that’s in my head. I’m not sure why. There’ll be a sign somewhere. 1667 1667 That’s crazy. It’s 400 g. Let’s go. What does it say? In the reign of Charles second and successively in the reigns of all of these other people. Oh, that’s new. They added a new one on recently. Wait, the queen died in 2022. 3 years ago. I thought it was like a month ago. What the hell? When did this happen? Did we go? 1667. See? I was so close. It was rebuilt in 1667. So when was the original? Who could say? or through there. Yeah, there’s a hole because it’s so like narrow and winding like bar. Do you want to go down to the cellar? [Music] struggling in the pub. Okay, let’s get the [Music] through here. Does this seem private, dude? I don’t think this is a bar. I think that’s Russia. [Music] court bar. That sounds Let’s do that. Okay, bear with us while we go through it. I’ve come to the end of the building. Just sit here. [Music] Great. It’s cool and empty finally this area. Nice. Yay. Okay. What we having? It’s not great. It’s not great. Okay. But whatever. I feel like we have to have a pint. Can Can you make mine cider but not tell anyone? And I’ll pretend it’s bit. [Music] Can I have like a pint of lemonade or do you think they have like grape fanta signal? Good. Let’s go. Amazing. Maybe like a like a like a pint of like a like a warm stout. It’s like a maybe like maybe maybe a pint of hot chocolate. Get me a cider that is definitely not old Rosie. Anything that isn’t Old Rosie. If there’s a brand that you recognize that is not Old Rosie, get that. Thank you so much. Can I have like a pint of warm tea, please? Can I have a lemon and honey if you don’t? Thank you. Do you do like a matcha makiato espresso roti, please? Thank you. Thank you so much. I’ll have inches probably. Probably. For some reason, I just can’t like I can’t do chocolate cocktails. I don’t know what it is. I just can’t do chocolate. If he comes back old Rosie, he might just despite me. I’ve given him a bit of a heart attack today. Guys, we did it. And this is our crime. 1667. That’s crazy. So they do food here. Yeah. What do they do? Let’s have a look. [Music] You do a sharing cheese board. Slow down. a British succ olives. The British success is mostly olives. I don’t think we grew olives yet. It always feels weird to me ordering in inches. It does. It feels like going to like a really fancy restaurant and then getting peso custard. Do you know what I mean? It feels like that. So, you just don’t do that. Well, you might do. It might be nice. Oh, you got Colesber. A little prick. Tap. So really likes Colesburgs. I think they’re disgusting. Thank you. How’s your Carl’sburg? Stout. It’s a stout. What’s a stout? You don’t know. Chat, what’s a stout? How can I try it? A 400. It is awful. I’m going let you I’m going let you sort that out first. Oh, wait. Cheers. Good job today. No dying. What a hater. [Music] It’s better than all I think. Yeah. You know when you have fish and chips, right, and you soak your fries in lemon juice and vinegar and nickels? Yeah. You know when you soak like your fries in lemon juice and vinegar and stuff? It’s like you finished your plate and then you pick up the plate and then you sip the juices. That’s what that tastes like. Poor Rosie. She can get bent. Honestly, what do you get from above? I got a pint of something for the for the aesthetics. I regret that. I should have got dinner from what I mean to say thank you for my pine is very nice. Thank you. the same culture that it came up with. Did you say snake kidney? Do you think it’s snake and kidney pie? Is that what you think it is? It’s snake kidney. Some tricks. It’s not snake kidney. It’s steak and kidney. Steak like from a cow. No, it’s not snake kidney, darling. It’s steak and kidney. Usually steak and kidney fries now don’t have kidney in them because no one likes kitties. But that sounds less bad. There you go. It’s not snake. We did have a problem with snakes at some point. Or was that Paris? Was that Spain? Someone had a snake issue. Um, so they released a bunch of different predators into the wild and they had that issue. India. India. Oh, that makes more sense. tigers. It was India had a had a rat problem so they released snakes and then they had a snake problem which is sounds a little bit worse. It’s so [ __ ] funny. I’m not gaslighting you. We don’t have snakes in Ireland. There aren’t a lot of snakes in Ireland. No. Okay. That would be quite hard for them to make that inventive. From when we found out about lamb being baby shaped. Today we’re going to find out about the snake. Very possible. I like it. Oh yeah. It tastes like apples that have gone off. Can I try your stout? [Music] It does taste like coffee. It does. No, it does. It tastes like So, my granddad, who’s now died, was a was a really big smoker and his brother was an alcoholic. And it tastes like the two of them just walked into a room basically is what that was. That was my experience from that. Black pudding is a thing. Yeah, it’s gross. It is delicious though. It really is. You put it black pudding. [Applause] I bought myself a fancy apple cider and it literally tastes like mommy apple juice. That’s what it is. It’s It’s apples that have gone off and then you’re drinking them. That is genuinely what it is. I was told what I was as a kid and never ate. What it was? Oh, black pudding. Yeah. No, me too. Me too. Me too. My mom’s a really picky eater. Um, so we never had that. I think she liked it though. I think that was the one thing she did like. I don’t know. It’s blood though. But then again, if you’re eating meat, you’re eating the flesh. Why not eat the blood? Why are you so precious? Don’t be so precious about it. Do you know what I mean? eat the [ __ ] snake bow. The same way that I feel like, okay, cutting down on meat is a good thing. But if you’re a vegetarian on like moral grounds or whatever, you have to not eat any animal. You can’t just like pick and choose. Fish are stupid. True. Fish are stupid. That’s a good point. Yeah, but you don’t know how stupid they are. We don’t know. We don’t have a measure. It’s a test. You have to not eat all if you’re doing it on like a we shouldn’t eat for living beings and you shouldn’t eat any animal, right? There are other reasons to do it. So, obviously, whatever. The same way I feel about that, I feel like if you’re going to eat animals, you can’t be picky about which ones. Eat all of them. Eat snake. I don’t think I believe this. I don’t feel confident about this theory at all. This is not how I feel. I’m fine blocking a fish on the head, but I can’t kill a cow. They’re too cute. eat all the animals. Yeah, I really I truly strongly believe in like an all or nothing system. I don’t mind which one you pick. Snakes or nothing. Snakes or not? That’s That’s where I’m learning. Only you only eat the dumb animals like the ones under the line on our That was so fun. I love that so much. No dogs. A Is it bad that sometimes Polo rolls over onto his back and he like spreads his legs and like I can see the entire leg that you might like like a chicken leg, right? And I can see what it would be like if it was crispy and golden and it tastes delicious and I kind of get hungry. Is that bad? I never would, but like cuz I can imagine what it would taste like. And it tastes juicy. Trying to go the wrong way round a roundabout was moment. No, no, I didn’t go the wrong way round a roundabout. I just cut straight across it and didn’t notice. Yeah, that was that was pretty bad. I remember you yelling at me. That was pretty rough. [Music] Curry wants to eat dogs. That’s awful. Awful. You guys eat chickens and they’re small. Cows are small. Chickens remember the friends and family and get excited to see them just like who’s the real monster. Look at all those losers going the wrong way around. Chickens are tasty, though. And I’m sure the dog is too. I bet it’s delicious. Pop it in a scoop. I look into a chicken’s eyes and there’s no soul there. So, only eat the stupid looking ones. I can get by. I can’t get behind that. Now, You’re heading to Tesco buying some chickens. See you soon. I don’t think chickens ever even knew they were alive. Just like plants. Chicken friend. Maybe they just looked spacey though. Yeah, maybe they just look. I’ve seen some really dumb looking human beings. You know, I wouldn’t eat them. You might Would you ever go vegan? It’s not a big jump. It’s just if I wanted to cut out dairy for my skin one month. Oh, no. It’s a vegan month. Do you know what I mean? Except eggs. I like eggs. I don’t eat a lot of eggs, though. It just doesn’t really come up for me in my dayto-day. I eat cheese in every single meal. Yeah, that might be. Even if I was going to cut out cheese for one one month or whatever, but I don’t think I would go vegan on purpose to go vegan. I think I might accidentally for other reasons. Chicken’s going to lay an egg no matter what, right? Might as well eat it. I look stupid. Should I be worried? I wouldn’t be around him unattended. Yes, he might eat you. Do you look stupid? What does looking stupid feel like? Do people underestimate you? Freedom, you kind of look a bit stupid. Um, what’s that like for you? He’s thinking to encapsulate the feeling. I’ll do a mic check. Thank you. Is that a recent thing? I’ll do a mic check right now. Mic check. Mic check. M tech. Speaking words. [Music] It is quite busy. Yeah, it might just be the noise in the pub. It used to take a while to convince people to listen to me, but now I have a degree. It’s fine. You just Yeah, people know I went to blah blah blah and they they listen to you. Yeah. I’m sorry. Maybe I could take off the fluffy. I could hold it, too. True. Is this better? Take off the fluffy. Excuse me, chat. Sorry. chat. How do you feel about various various things? ASMR. Well, that’s better. The quick brown fox jumped over the lazy cow and that’s why I ate him. What did you drop it in? The table’s just a little wet. I just popped out on the table and Clem’s face was like, “Oh, whoops.” Chester cheese pub. You know they have a sharing cheese board. I could [ __ ] with the sharing cheese board. Yeah, that’s so interesting. Like looking do a stream on what it means to look stupid and look smart cuz like the smartest person I know by far. [ __ ] all you other [ __ ] Um but you have certain stereotypes that one would associate with being dumb. I blame like 70s movie star movies for that stereotype cuz he’s got like a rounded soft blonde thing going on like a little chair of baby like a like a lovely little sunshine lan exactly his first compliment of the stream. Well, it was a little bit backhanded because I said it made him look stupid. Sorry. Yeah, it’s interesting. Of course, intelligence can have completely different levels uh different meanings as well. What is intelligence? No one knows. Blah blah blah blah blah. But you can make snap judgments about whether or not someone is looks smart or not. Someone some people say it’s in the eyes. But now he’s got dope eyes. It would be a fun stream topic. It would be. Stereotypes. Do you know what would be fun? Going out onto the street and pointing at people. This man for instance. And then you grab him and you interview him. This guy for instance looks like an idiot. Sir, do you get that a lot? Do people think you’re an idiot? So, oh, are you an idiot? Quick, here’s do some maths quickly. You look smart is a backhanded compliment cuz it implies they only look smart. It also implies the stereotypes of looking smart, which means ugly, bad hair, [ __ ] eyes, you know, those are the stereotypes of looking smart. If someone says you look smart, what does it mean? sharp and doesn’t own a hair straightener is what that means. I’m sure Cludom has Cludom has sultry bedroom eyes. Eyes are know how to respond to that. Excuse you. Excuse you hugely. I should change the title. Can someone change the title? No, I think I can. Why did I do that? Why did I make that a setting? Oh, I made that a setting because um like 3 years ago I had once that kept changing the title because they I guess they thought it was being helpful, which was really really nice of that. But the titles were like really weird inside jokes. And then one time, oh yeah, one time they were having like a joke argument and they kept switching the title back and forth to like at each other also this person or something. And then I then I made it me only. But this was years ago. Oh, I don’t have Wi-Fi. I’m on your hotspot. You want me to get off your hotspot? Okay. Rude. Well, your hotspot sucks anyway cuz my 5G, but I’m on your hotspot. Your You’re on the pub Wi-Fi. My 5G works. It didn’t. My phone wasn’t working cuz I was on your hotspot. You should get off the pub Wi-Fi or get a better get a better SIM card for it. Okay. Um, yeah, let’s let’s oldest pub in London. Yay. I’m trying to get you back. There you are. Hello. What’s his service provider? The [ __ ] one. Does he have unlimited data? Yeah, you have a lot. I got like a lot of data thinking I would use it cuz streaming from phones sometimes and stuff like that. I’ve never come close. Like it gives me a data warning being like, “You’ve used 2 gigs of data.” I have hund times that. It’s ridiculous. Well, I wonder how haunted it is. Ooh. Are there any horror stories? Are there any ghost stories about Ye old Cheshure Cheese? It’s not a very intimidating word. Let’s find out. Ghost story. Ye old Cheshure Cheese. Ye old Cheshure Cheese Pub is seeped in history in Fukville. One popular tale revolves around a stuffed parrot named Polly, who was supposedly became notorious for its foul language and even mimicked the sounds of popping champagne corks fainting afterward. Another story suggest the pup is haunted with one visitor claiming to have felt a presence and heard strange noises late at night. The pub’s dark and spooky atmosphere. It is spooky. It is dark and spooky. I will say that. I will say that we’re in like the open outdoor newish bit, but in there is dark and spooky and has very bad day reception. You hungry? I’m quite hungry. I could I could eat. What are you thinking? Are you thinking something to share, like a little thing, or are you wanting like a meal? Chesha cheese. What you saying? Okay. So, Polly the parrot was a fixture in the pub for many years and it gave notoriety for its colorful language especially during the World War I. Interesting. Interesting. And it kept fainting. So, it was not very well changing. Yeah. Has to be Cheese chuchi. Cheese chuchi. The hell is a chuchi? The hell is a chuchi? Chiku. [Music] That makes sense. How my dick. That’s not being a dick. That’s being stupid. Don’t Don’t mock me. Don’t assume. What? What? It’s one of the razors, isn’t it? Harland’s razor. Okam’s razor. Henland’s. It’s not Okams. One of them is the easiest thing is the right one. That’s OAM. And the other one, Henland’s razor or someone is don’t assume malice when incompetence is the answer. In that case though, I was being a dick, but like you didn’t know that I was. [Music] What’s the other? Is it Henland’s razor? Harlem’s razor. Someone’s razor. Akam. Oh, cute. But the full of terrorists. Yes. I don’t remember. Do you want to get a cheese board? These people must be very well shaped. [Music] Love you peer over at my chat waiting for me to read a message. It’s like never shave for a rest with a rusty razor. Czechov’s gun. Is that a new one or is that the one I’m talking about? It’s like when he DMs you stuff and he’s waiting for you to read it. Genuinely, it’s so funny. [Music] Czechov’s gun is always there for a reason. Okay. Always there for a reason. What would Perry’s razor be? Ooh. Don’t put your hand in a hole if you don’t know what’s on the other side. But we got to make it sound sexier than that. A hand in a hole. Is a missing hand. A hand. A hand in a hole is not a hand to begin with. Ooh. Ooh. A hand in a hole makes the whole world handless. Don’t fist the unknown. That’s so good. That’s so good. Hand in a hole. Or don’t reach into mystery. Ooh. Wow. Makes me think of that scene in Silent Hill, too. I was gobsmacked at that scene in Silent Hill, too. That’s, you know, that’s after what I said about it and then it happened and then it was the worst thing in the world. There’s a reason it’s a theme in a horror show. Everyone knows. Everyone knows. Don’t put your hand in a hole if you don’t know what’s on the other side. It’s a bad thing to do. Luckily though, spoilery, Silent Hill 2 wasn’t the most awful thing in the in the wall. But you don’t do it. You don’t do it, chat. He who fists the unknown may become chili cheese top like something like that brought somebody different. So anyway, [Applause] that was the expression you’re going for. Well, congratulations. I I do take issue with those. I take issue with the confirmed, but that is I don’t get it, but I’m not sure I want to. You don’t want to. You don’t want to. Oh, no. Where’s my face? Whenever someone says that’s a new emote, I’m always insecure because I was like, what did my face look like? Cuz I’ve seen some of the emotes. I didn’t realize how deep the the the frown is that I can make. I didn’t realize this. I’m not going to be able to do it now because I I can’t do it when I’m thinking about it. As soon as I think about it, I can’t do it anymore. I can’t do it as soon as I think about it. But what kind of bar is this? Ye old chesha cheese. It’s an old bar. It was It was covered. It was the thing. It was made of thing. Sorry, they’re distracting the very loud English boys. Um, 1667, all of the monarchs, most of the monarchs since Charles II. Charlie, this is Charles the second. We have Charles II is the current king. Charles the No, James II. Charles Charles the second is the current king. Should I Google it? It hosted Charles Dickens, GK Chesterton, Mark Twain. [Music] Wow. It burnt down in the great fire in 1666, but was actually built for the first time in 1538. So, the pub has been here since 1538. Built down, rebuilt 1667. So, that’s quite fun. Who was king in 1667? King Louis IVth of France Charles the second is it Charles the third. Can you hear him? He’s telling me to get [ __ ] Wait, really? I’m sorry. Yeah, you’re right. I’m sorry. Charles the third. I didn’t know that. Is that crazy that I didn’t know that? Charles the third. Charles King. He’s Charles the third. No way. That’s actually news. Crazy. So, this pub has been here since the last time there was a Charles and the king. Pub is literally older than the US. When was US colonized? Is that what we want to what what what do you regard as like the day one of the US like historically? Americans in chat. What’s what’s is it do you would it be independence day or would it be like setting up settlements when the settlers arrived? Is there like a day that the sellers arrived or something? What’s the vibe? The Declaration of Independence 1776. So, this pub is 100 years older than the US. Isn’t that fun? To be fair though, we were the sellers. So, there’s going to be a lot of stuff in London that is older than the US because we were the ones who sold. Um, you are us. Hello. Wait, that means though both English and American ancestors may have been at this pub because it was before we moved to the to America. A guys, isn’t that so sweet? Isn’t that so wholesome? both English and American ancestors here. [Music] I’m not going to say that. If you want to say that, you can say it. No. He says, “Your grandma might have [ __ ] in this.” [Applause] Wow. Isn’t that lovely? Everyone say a a both American and English ancestors. Why is no one else finding this cute? Why is everyone mad at me? Wait, what I do? We made you. I didn’t say we made you. We are you. Your culture is meaningless and empty. They’re going to say they have a better climb to the pub than you. Wasn’t there a whole thing about Shakespeare that like you’re supposed to say you’re you’re supposed to read Shakespeare in an American accent because our our accent has deviated more than the Americans has. I can’t imagine that’s true though cuz you went so far away. It is true. Like English accents deviated more in those 350 years than American accents did. So actually the accent you would have heard in this pub in 1667 would be similar to your accents and to our accents. Is that would that be true? That’s crazy. I don’t know if that’s true. How can anyone know? They probably have ways. I don’t know what they are though, Jim, to be fair to you. That’s a good point. Love me. Love me points. The self is an illusion. There is no you. Well, that’s another another take. It’s another one. You’re hungry. Get some food. You want me to pick for you? What do I You’re going to go order food. What kind of food are you going to order? What are you going to get? An entire meal or are you going to get a nibbling? A a nibble? I have to know cuz then I can match it. Shakespeare did some podcast before he died. Do you think Shakespeare would have been a podcast boy? There was a whole thing about not really knowing who wrote Shakespeare plays because basically they thought that Shakespeare, the person they thought was Shakespeare, um didn’t know enough words. You’re going to get some spicy wings. Okay, I’ll get a nibbling. A nib in then. Thank you. H But he worked with someone who did know him before. They think maybe it was actually the person he worked for that wrote the plays but didn’t wouldn’t to be anonymous for like I don’t know reasons. Can you get me hummus and flatbread? What would you have got me? See, I was going to say that, but I’m trying to be good. You You get me the one that represents how much you love me. But do you love me in terms of my happiness or my health that you have to decide for yourself? No, that was terrible. Too much. Too much. [Applause] Thank you. It’s a drop. It’s always a drop. It’s always trap. It’s so that I can get the bad thing that I want without asking for the bad thing that I want. It’s like you get it for me if you believe I should have it. Is that toxic? I think that’s toxic. Yeah, it’s really serious though. Impossible test. Get enough to share with Fred. We We will. Don’t worry, Jack. We will. There’ll be enough to share. Get some lamb kebabs. Don’t ever flat bread is a great snack. It really is. You have to order as if it was 1667. I’m not wearing enough hats. I feel like a lot of people wore hats in 1667. I think hats were the things to do. That was the bad thing. Oh, ye old cheshure cheese. stories. [Music] Oh, chat. You know how I said I got nonwaterproof mascara the other day? I thought it would be like the same. I accidentally got non waterproof mascara. I thought it would be the same. I’m like, I don’t really notice it anyway. Like, whatever. It’s probably fine. I put it on this morning. I go outside, it’s quite windy, so tears rolled down my cheeks. Runaway bride. Genuinely, I look like a runaway bride. Everyone was staring at me on the street, but I was by myself. So, I thought that I was just being paranoid. Why is everyone looking at me? Do you know what I mean? And then Clem comes out of the shop and he’s like, “What’s happened?” Runaway bride. Actually, serious. I’m buying waterproof scar ASAP. Actually ridiculous. Okay, let me find you ghost stories if you want to hear about the dead parrot. There’s just a lot about a parrot and it’s just not very interesting. They just keep talking about parrot. So, it’s like there was a parrot. A parrot lived in the pub and it used to make noises as parrots do. Isn’t that fun? Um, here is some gay sex that occurred in the pub. Oh, allegedly occurred in the pub. Quite graphic. Why not? It’s odd. I’ve seen some of the art. It’s art. Is that a woman or a man? Oh, that’s a woman. Never mind. It’s heterosexual. Boring. That’s your grandma. That’s America’s grandfather. And that’s an English woman. So, of course, I can show this. It’s stone. It’s a It’s a stone car. Of course, I can. Too graphic. Um. Oh, they’ve stuffed the parrot. The parrot’s still here somewhere. A poly’s around here somewhere. Don’t know where. Um, what else? An elephant once visited. Jumbo Junior was here. You know, I really think there’d be like more. I really I really thought there’d be some more stuff about this. Oh, hold on. A midwife was murdered here in the 17th century. Let’s go. That’s fun. All right, gather around, kids. Everyone, buckle in. Mid midwife. Cheddar cheese. Midwife murdered. No, apparently that didn’t happen. Okay. Oh, wait. Yeah. 1680. It is just a story. I don’t know if it’s real. 1680. Um, a midwife haunted the house where she died. um and induced some of the residents the house that was I guess near here or above here. She induced some of the residents to dig up the bones of the bastard children that she had murdered as a ghost. Apparently the bones, you can find them. They’re in the pub somewhere. Has anyone read A Tale of Two Cities? Charles Dickens [Music] mentions this pub. Isn’t that fun? This very pub is mentioned in a Charles Dickens book. That’s actually really [ __ ] cool. Actually, when you think of Charles Dickens books, that’s actually really [ __ ] cool. But like genuinely this isn’t that sick. So genuinely like I deconceptualize that in my head for a second. Very chill. It’s really really cool. It’s in a Charles Dickens book. You want it? Read it. Samuel Smith brewer beer brewed at Yorkshire’s oldest brewery established 1758. Still older than America. Your culture is meaningless. My pint is older than your country. [Applause] [Music] That would be a good clip. Do you know what? I’m kind of thinking this. Let’s different avenues I can go with my Instagram. And one of the avenues I’m considering is just going for full America rage bait. Americans in chat. How would you feel about that? Not about you personally. I promise. Just like full just that’s all I do. Like every real is just my pine country blah blah blah blah blah. Like do you know what I mean? Would that be losing all the American subscribers in 1098? Please don’t. Please don’t leave me. Please don’t. Thank you so much. Love you, arrogance. Sorry, arrogance. You’d rather have a fresh bite. Thank you. Yeah, true. It’s not a compliment about the point. Bring it on. Get goofed on, babies. Yeah. You wouldn’t take it personally. Okay, that’s good. That’s good. I don’t harbor any ill will against Americans. Not one. Not a single thing. Genuinely don’t. You do. Don’t cap me. Cap you. Maybe about your current government, but like not anything else. Genuinely don’t. Oh, I don’t like the con the the consuming the the oversized consume culture, but I understand why. Thank you so much. Thank you. Holy [ __ ] Wait, show if you don’t mind. Holy Jesus Christ. Looking have as many of the prizes you want. Of course. No, I genuinely absolutely don’t. I just find it funny. Of course I don’t. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. We are the same. We’re the same culture. We’re the same culture. We came from the same place. We do the same things. We have the same history if you go back enough. Oh yeah. [ __ ] I’m Canadian. I forgot. I’m Canadian. Yeah. Barely. Do you know I’ve only ever had Weather Spoons, halumi fries, and these are really good. This is not what I thought halumi fries were. This is amazing. That cheese is also older than America because it’s ye old. It is ye old. EO cheese. Holy [ __ ] Yes, please. You can hear the crunch. The crunch is real. It’s It’s surreal. Canada also migrated from Britain, didn’t they? I thought it was the French. How come they speak French? I think I asked Carl Junior this in Anandos. I did. I asked Carl Junior, “How come you guys speak French in a Nando once and if he was afraid of the dark and I forgot what his answers were [Music] because of the French from France. I see. [Music] That makes sense. A lot of different groups settled there. That’s good. They speak Welsh in parts of South America and there are bits of everyone everywhere. I love that. Genuinely, I love it. That’s so much. Do you know what I really like about visiting San Diego was how many people spoke Spanish. It felt like half and half like English Spanish country in San Diego. It was really nice. Movie night. Um, I should be able to I might be able to make it back in time. I might be a bit late. I should be able to make it back in time. I’ll try. I’ll let you guys know. There’s some country where you’re having sort of West Virginia London. How did that even go? Take me home to the place I found London Mountain. New York was originally called New Amsterdam because the Dutch settled that. Interesting. I mean, it sold for a dollar. A dollar? What? How did that happen? [Applause] I really want to learn all about this. I want to make a try. When I lived in London, spec specifically around Central shopping, I’d spot a lot of Spanish speakers and sometimes help translate a couple times. I’m not sure whether they realize I didn’t work there. Oh no. That’s nice. Puerto Rico. Everyone speaks Spanish and it’s owned by the USA, but and everyone there is an American citizen. You you do become an automatic American citizen. How dare you if you live in frames weird. I don’t want to stir any political tension. Seems weird. It’s not his own country. H. And he found out about the whole Puerto Rico technically being under US kind of thing relatively recently. Me too. I thought it was its own country for so long. Only only recently. Hey guys, what’s your favorite state in the spirit of Shakespeare? I don’t know. Here’s another interesting thing that I’ve been thinking a lot about recently. Do you think Shakespeare was gay? Everyone keeps saying that he’s gay. And if you read a lot of the plays, they’re incredibly gay. Like there’s one, is it The Merchant of Venice? It’s the one where the guy’s like, “Do we not bleed? If you prick me, do I not bleed? Pound of flesh, etc. That one. incredibly gay. Like so gay. Like unbelie like unbelievably. Like I’m in love with my best friend who sleeps in my bed gay. Um but then some people say that no, they just gender bend the characters all the time and blah blah blah blah. What do you think? A wife and children? No, I don’t mean Shakespeare was gay. I mean Shakespeare plays, some of them had gay characters that went like unannounced. True. It could have also been a true I wonder if people thought about it when I came out. Same because there’s a whole scene in the beginning where they’re like talking in their bedroom and arguing about like how they love each other and but he doesn’t want to spend time with him or something. And it’s like if they’re a couple then I don’t understand what we’re doing. They should be [Applause] [Music] Yeah. When you have a wife or a girlfriend who’s a cover for your gayness, it’s called a beard. What’s the other way around? There’s a name for it. If you’re a lesbian and you have a boyfriend, there’s a name for him. But if you’re both, this is where it’s fun. If you he’s gay and you’re a lesbian and you’re together, it’s called a lavender relationship. Lavender. Isn’t that fun? I don’t know how often it happens. A frog. That’s such a good word. That’s such a good word for him. A frog. The more you know. I know I there’s so many memes about lavender relationships on my for you page recently and I don’t know why [Music] for you. [Music] This was a good reward. We didn’t die. We didn’t die. We traveled too far. We got a hike to the oldest club in London. We cycled from [ __ ] I don’t even know Patney to here. And I accidentally went the wrong way around a roundabout and accidentally crossed the red light. But we didn’t die and we didn’t hurt anyone else or get anyone else injured. Success. I gave my food to Cleo to the cameraman. He was looking for lawn so I gave him some halumi fries. Except for that one guy. We don’t talk about that. Oh [ __ ] I forgot. Oh yeah, that guy I hit. Not very like I wasn’t going very far. It’s okay. Have you guys seen I think you should leave. He was a nothing person. It doesn’t even matter. They don’t even care. They don’t even mind. No, he’s cuz they’re like nothing. So, you should watch I think you should leave. That episode was [ __ ] hilarious. You hit someone. No, I grazed someone gently. Honestly, it was like a It was a tender kiss. Both my bike and his arm. I went over his foot. Oh god. I’m going to have to check the clip. I don’t want to check the clip. He’s like a nothing. Oh, you’ve got the clip. [Music] I don’t know if I went over that. Okay. Okay. You tell me what happened. Is it? Did I go over his butt? I did hit him. A No. I did not ding my bell either. Cuz if I dinged my bell a bunch, it would be his fault. Unfortunately, it’s not his fault. It’s my fault. My bad. My bad. My bad. My bad. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I should not be allowed on the roads. How could one ever live that down? Maya, no courtroom evidence. It’s no foot. I don’t I don’t think that I I think I nudged his arm. I don’t think I ran over his foot. He did like pull up his foot really quickly, but I think he was being a drama queen. Honestly, I think he was more surprised than anything else. I’m the most I’m the slowest of the most dangerous cyclist. Don’t be fooled. Going too slowly on roads is dangerous. Drivers make that mistake sometimes. Drivers, including some cyclists, including me, make that mistake sometimes. You told me the reason I was so dangerous is cuz I wasn’t confident enough. And then I was confident. And then apparently that’s dangerous, too. Cuz I went the wrong way round a roundabout. I confidently went the wrong way round a roundabout. Remember you were a car. I’m not used to being a car. I’ve never been a car before. I don’t think he turned left into you at the last moment. Do you think? Okay, one more time. Run it back. Run it back. Run it back. Where’s the clip? Where’s the clip? Oh, I’ve lost the clip. I’ve lost the clip. Oh, I got it. I got it. I got it. Oh, no. I don’t know. He did randomly sideways. Am I innocent? I should have done my bow. But am I innocent? [Music] He should have checked his mirrors. Exactly. He need a playbyplay with a lawyer. I know a lawyer. Who? Oh [ __ ] We can show him and ask him. I have a friend who’s a lawyer. We’ll do this play by play. That’s what I’ll do. So, everyone’s at fault. You could have said something. I also didn’t stop. It was a hit and run. I said sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry. And then kept going. is me apologizing to him admitting fault. Have I am I cooked? Oh, thank goodness the guy who’s at fault here. How familiar is he with traffic law? I don’t. All law is the same. Is that his job? He is English. Doesn’t mean he knows traffic law. He lives in London. A lot of traffic, does he? I don’t know. Ready? Bristol. Watch the lawyer report it to the police. He does business. Well, well, I’m standing on business. So, that that makes sense. Is it really traffic if it’s pedestrian versus bike? I don’t know what it would be. It’s some kind of assault charge. I don’t Listen, we can all just chalk it up to an accident. He doesn’t know my name. I doesn’t I don’t know his name. And ultimately, that’s all it comes down to. If he can’t identify me in a lineup, then it doesn’t matter. The video is AI. Exactly. If you look closely, you’ll see he has six fingers. So, so ultimately ultimately, is that what a hit and run is? If you can’t identify me, I didn’t do anything wrong. You should be paying attention. Do you remember Extra Emily getting in loads of trouble for running a red light, but she was in a cop? And that’s serious business. I was on a bike and it was an accident and therefore it’s okay. You’re going to have to pay punitive damages for the injury and trauma that you that you caused his foot. I didn’t hit his foot. His foot is fine. He was acting like a footballer. Like a footballer at Halime. You also run. Oh yeah. Yeah. But it was a It was a people red light. It was a red light for people. People aren’t as important as No, but listen. Okay. There’s levels of red light. You’ve got you’ve got cars. Running a plane red light is a really big deal. I train don’t do that. Right? Everyone can admit that running a train red light, you know, when the barrier comes down and goes me, that’s a really big deal. Like you do not do that, right? You can agree on that. And then you’ve got cars on like a motorway or like lots of junctions. That’s a really big deal. That’s really dangerous. And then cars on a regular road. That’s pretty dangerous. But you’re the one who’s going to get injured, not the car. And then you’ve got people like just people crossing. It was a people crossing. It wasn’t a car crossing. It was just people. And no one was walking. I didn’t bump anyone. I was making eye contact with all them fools and no one was walking. I didn’t even know it was a red light because they were just standing there. If they were if it was green, why weren’t they crossing? Maybe they didn’t want to cross. Maybe they didn’t want to cross. Did that cross your mind? Maybe they were just standing there cuz they like the view. Luckily people are resistant to bicycles. Yeah. [ __ ] the people. [ __ ] the people. Exactly. Stop these mental gymnastics. Put the shovel down. But no one was walking. Yeah, it was just people lined up on ei side of the road and I rode past and then they walked behind me. It’s not like it’s not like I murdered someone. It’s absolutely outrageous. I’m not standing for this. I’m not standing for this. Ran a red light. That sounds really bad. And it wasn’t that bad. I’m a bike. I was on a bike. What about the women that yell at you? More women they No, now you’re making No, did they? No woman yelled at me. No woman yelled at me. That’s not a thing. Oh, no. That wasn’t cuz I ran a red light. No, no, no. The woman that yelled at me. Well, she didn’t yell at me. She yelled at her friend or whoever pulled her. Basically, I was on a cycle lane and she stepped out into the cycle lane and I dung my bell like a lot and slowed way down, but she was still in the cycle lane. And then the I assume her daughter or someone grabbed her and pulled her back onto the road. And then she started screaming at her daughter in Italian or something. She was screaming at our door like really angry about it because she’s a prick. Basically, she’s a massive raging wanker [ __ ] and I should have hit her with my bike. Um probably people hate being wrong. Wanker [ __ ] hate being wrong. Honestly, she she just made a little mistake. Someone saved her. Well, not a life. if I was going at like like a fifth of a kilometer an hour. So, her life was fine. Someone saved her from getting a little grazed on her shin or something. Um, from my tire slowly going past and she just absolutely flipped out. She flipped out. Yeah, she wasn’t yelling at me. She’s getting [Music] clip that. Don’t fit that. See, at the start of this stream when I said, “Please make clips,” it was because so I didn’t have to go back and find stuff cuz I wanted to use you as free labor. Thank you. I didn’t realize I’d get in so much legal trouble during this stream. And now I’m regretting asking you to clip things. It was a really bad call from me. Actually, it was a really bad call. Thank you. Now everything’s immortalized. Oh dear. Don’t worry, we clipped all the wrong stuff out of context. Did anyone clip anything useful for me? No. No. [Music] The amount of times I’ve always gotten clip of those electric scooters. By the electric scooters that we have in America, it’s insane. Oh, you should be looking where you’re going then, shouldn’t you? I just don’t think anyone’s thinking about how stressful it is for the people in the cars. Like that old man had it coming. I really don’t want to drive. I don’t think I’d be very good at it. I don’t I don’t think it’s the right thing for me. He didn’t look left and right before crossing the pedestrian path. Yeah, just very very stressful. Very stressful for the people who are driving the deadly lethal vehicles because I don’t know what’s going on or where to turn and I don’t really know what the rules are. We should have studied the rules like roundabout. I didn’t know there was a roundabout. How did you know it was a roundabout? Cuz all of the cars were going one way. You use your eyes to see. Can I Can I do what you just did? Cuz it’s really funny. He’s such a prick. Hey guys, I use my eyes to see. Such a dick. It was a circle. In the middle of the circle was this massive park. I didn’t know it was a roundabout. I just thought everyone wanted to go the same place. I’m not cut out. I’m not cut out for it. I’m not. I can’t. I can’t. I’m sorry for Victim blaming you when you said that you got hit or kept almost getting hit by the scooters. I’m sorry. Wait, when you say scooters, you mean the like push with your foot scooters? Yeah. Road directions are complicated. Thank you, Chris. Thank you. [ __ ] If I’m going to get back in time for movie night, we got to go. We got to go go go. I don’t think I will be, by the way. I I don’t think I will be. Sorry. Um, yeah, I’m not I’m not going to be back in time, Sagge, because I lost track of Whoopsie daisies. Um, okay. So, please don’t tell anyone anything that you’ve experienced on today’s stream. Please don’t tell anyone that you’ve experienced today or that you’ve seen today. Uh, let’s keep this between us and my lawyer. [Music] The man was fine. I barely touched him. The red light was only a pedestrian and I missed it by like a second and no one was no one was even crossing. And there’s no evidence of me going the wrong way on a roundabout. I don’t actually believe that that happened. So you’ll have to prove us. [Music] Let’s get out of the pub. Come on. You’ll cher [Music] [Applause] [Music] Thank you Let me American. I really like the American accent. He was talking about how there were women servers. Only women could serve in that pub. And they went on to smile or they did it back in the good old days. Oh, yeah. It’s probably cuz we went through the that place. You should be fine now. 400y old pup man. You have to bear with us. All right, guys. Well, Chatterinos, thank you so much for today’s stream. If you like what you see, Hold this. Hold this. Hold this. Thank you so much. If you like what you see, remember to follow. Um, do the How do I Hold on. Hold on. If you like what you see, remember to follow. If you don’t, do it anyway. Twitter for announcement. Twitter for announcements. Instagram for pictures. Discord for everything else. Twitter and I post really soon. Make sure to subscribe. And the next stream is tomorrow. Yes. At 400 p.m. British time. Thank you so so so much. That’s it. Um, [Music] thank you for the stream. Be nice to Ren cuz she’s cool and I want her to be my friend. Oh, this is Oh, jeez. river.