The most unfriendly city in the world? Many expats – often people who move to another country for professional reasons – confirm this cliché about Berlin. Lots of bureaucracy, hardly any smiling people, cold winter and loneliness. Andy felt the same way when she came to Berlin from Spain 10 years ago. She told us why she came here, what has kept her there for so long and why now … she wants to leave again.
CREDITS:
Report: Nele Schmidt
Executive Editor: Lukas Hansen
Camera: Neven Hillebrands
Video editor: Chris Schalko
Motion editor: Christian Kuhn
Voice: Madelaine Pitt
CHAPTERS:
00:00-01:36 Intro
01:36-03:54 Reality check
03:54-06:35 Struggles
06:35-08:27 Lessons
08:27-10:28 Friends
10:28-11:22 Future
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37 Comments
A lot of you here in the comments seem to have made similar experiences. We would love to hear more about your stories: feel free to leave a comment ☀️
Europeans, also those of color are just getting exterminated like Indians where in south America and the USA. We have 1000sands of years of history, culture dialects and it is all getting erased, labeled as bad and everyone is forced to speak English. I am from the Netherlands and black, we have a right government that doest function because all the institution leaders are left and white. According to them I am racist we are getting erased just like the native americans and we will end up like the USA.
Andy from Spain should look at her own country and the mess there too. Young girls on the beach and on the streets are being harrased or worse by uninvited guests. I didn't find the spanish so nice either. They only like their own kind so I don't know why she complains about Germans doing it.
I guess when you have work 4-6 months out of the year in taxes to get "free" welfare and your countries turn into the 3rd world you wouldn't be happy either.
Suck it up buttercup, your generation is way too soft from being coddled and lied to by the EU "liberal democracies". True story.
Strange. I'm German and moved to Berlin 20 years ago. I met a lot of expats over the years and became friends with some of them. The only nationality that seems to never wanna mingle and always stays with each other are people from Spain. You hear and see them everywhere here but they always ignore you.
….what is the difference between an expat and a migrant?
Don´t worry this is not just a Berlin issue. Every major German city is the same. I can´t speak for the countryside, because I don´t know about that. Not only have I witnessed it myself, but seen and heard the same issues from a lot of people. Regardless if you speak German or not, germans keep to themselves. You will have it really hard to find any real inclusion in German friend groups, even if you´re European yourself. I know East Asians, Middle Eastern people, South Europeans, and East Europeans, even some French people who struggle with this. Kinda strange, especially if you grew up in Germany and speak German as your mother tongue, you're still kind of ostracized, just included superficially.
Every country in Europe is the same. Why pick on Germany?
Those cities expats like the most are tourist cities of countries that need there money. In rich countries its native population are forced to speak English since most Expats refuse to learn the local language and the native population gets expelled from the cities just like how native americans got expelled by colonists. Most expats triet our countries like a side girlfriend, nice to have fun with but not taking serious because they are already married and when the fun is over or they work elsewhere they ditch us. They are not interested in getting to know us, build a long term serious relation or contribute in any way except taxes which are lower for them.
Its not a black white thing either, once your country is open to mass expat / foreign student -ism people who in your street disappear (especially black people / immigrants because they are poorer most of the time) and are replaced by foreigners and before you know it you must speak English, you must do this and that and adopt to them and they take over the whole area and as soon as you see it is getting out of control and complain, you are a for right extremist and racist and it does not matter what color you are because public institutions are filling their pockets with taxes and all kinds of expat / refugee funds so everyone who disagrees is the enemy!
Let's say the reality: making friends as an adult is hard. Especially if you are a foreigner and you are a freelance/work from home or are a remote worker.
Is very easy today to meet people, there's plenty of networking opportunities, but is harder to keep friendships alive. I feel like that the reason is that we don't need to be that social anymore. And social media made us more selective and exclusive. This is so sad. Friendship, real friendship, are the most important thing of life in my opinion.
In the Netherlands the renting is reversed now, the do not want to rent to Dutch people because even when they work at the same company as an expat an expat gets guarantee rent payments from the employer and both expats and employers do not give a fk about maximal rent, they are needed so they can get swindled twice the allowed rent easely for 4-8 year periods and dont complain either. So real estate rent brokers over here put housing in English and tell locals it is already gone.
I moved to Berlin some 6 years back. Then I was abroad for a week and noticed that I didn’t miss the city at all. And life in Berlin is expensive and grey for most of the year. Not to mention the rude and abrasive attitude of people here.
I live in Germany since several year and like Germans, I don't care to be friend of them. I don't simply need their friendship. I work with them I do what I have to do and leave.
how come that woman is paler than any Nordic person i know😂. Big turn off. I am sorry but her look and her attitude just pulls people down. I will surround myself with people who give positive energy.
In Switzerland it's the same. People are not racist, they're just extremely reserved and scared to talk to people they don't know since childhood. I was at a course with 20 doctors and psychologists that didn't know each other. During the first break everyone was just standing there without talking, ignoring everyone else. I was the first person to say something lmao
I'm spanish as well and in the same situation as well. All of a sudden you feel you don't belong anywhere, somekind of a nomad, it's a very very weird sensation that never leaves.
Of all the places you can chose to live in the world, Germany is the last place I would go to 😂
Been in Finland for 14 years, also getting ready to leave. My life before didn’t boast such a high GDP or living standard—as conceived and measured by economists—but it was far richer in things that matter more to me: connections, deep personal relationships, a dynamic and thriving culture, and enjoyable weather. Hopefully, in the near future, when "living standards" are discussed, those very human things will be taken into account.
To the people criticizing Andy’s comments about the winter, I’d be willing to bet she KNEW the winters would be harsher than in Madrid and that she DID Google the temperatures. Just like I knew, long before moving here, how brutal and especially LONG the winter would be. And I even loved it for the first five years. Absolutely embraced it. Then, slowly, it becomes unbelievably taxing—on your will to make plans, on the sheer effort required to layer up just to do the most mundane things. That’s what she’s referring to.
In addition to that, having a car means an extra set of tires, finding a lease for those tires, booking an official appointment to get them changed (when everyone else is doing the same, otherwise you get fined for having the wrong type). It’s really, really taxing and inconvenient. For me. After a few years? It’s just not worth it.
Things turned especially sour when I bought a house. When renting, all buildings have a maintenance company to handle the yard and entrances. Annoying as it is to be buried under snow for six months a year, it’s far worse when you own your place—because now you have to shovel. Three, four times a day. Sometimes I’d shovel before bed to make sure I could get to work in the morning, only to find my car (and the pathway) buried again. And my car is in a garage, with a roof and a wall on one side. Most people park theirs on the street.
Now, of course, you can dismiss all of this and say, “Entitled young people don’t want to deal with anything.” Your prerogative. But that’s not my point. My point is: at some stage, you weigh the supposed benefits of living in a country like this against the downsides, and for me, it’s just not worth it. I have options. I don’t have to live like this.
Here’s something that truly shocked me when I arrived, winter-wise. I was in disbelief at how many Finns hate winter too. They get depressed, or at the very least, cranky—and a fantastically high number of them wish they could escape it.
Mass immigration is destroying Europe and making everyplace unfriendly.
I wished the muslims would go back as well❤❤
If you want to Integrate in germany and you didn't grow up here, you have to join one or multiple "Vereine", which are special Clubs dedicated to specific hobbys or sports.
First world, liberal, white woman problems…
Northern Europe is and always will be racist their system is set up for them to be cold and distant from " outsiders", one of the reasons why their people are falling apart and dying
¡Qué guapa es!
Tbh I think her only legitimate complaint is being excluded by Germans, although I believe it's understandable to exclude someone if their language skills are too poor to engage with the rest of the group in their native language. When it comes to the weather, this is completely predictable if you just google the winter weather in Germany before moving there. Renting for foreigners is significantly more difficult for foreigners in 3/3 countries I have lived in, and seems to be a global phenomenon.
When it comes to friendliness & talking to cashiers, this is a completely cultural thing. I'm not German, but I don't care what my cashier has been up to. I want to buy my things and leave.
Where the neighbors look to the other side every time they cross path with you and if you look a bit different they will always follow you around in the shops and supermarkets. My friend came to Germany to visit and was followed around by the police while in Dresden taking pictures of the city. Worst square heads ever.
It's WESTERN CAPITALISM 😮…come to kind, generous, friendly, polite Morocco….also honest inexpensive food, restaurants, and AGADIR sun, sun, sun, no humidity, the Atlantic Ocean and nearby foothills of the Atlas. Only rude cold people here: the northern Europeans😅…and the dumbed-down Americans 😮
Everyday Germany is starting to annoy me more and more. I’m American and I’ll be leaving here soon after 5 years of living here.
I dont think this is because of the people in Berlin. It's the same where I'm from in Spain, and other countries I've been too. A lot of big cities are selling out to tourists, displacing locals and making life impossible for those who stay, people become kind of resentful. A lot of this resentment goes to migrants or social housing, which I find absurd because, like the locals, they too have to move to the outskirts to afford living there. A migrant is different from a tourist, and it's incredible the damage that unfettered tourism can do, basically destroying the soul of a city. Cities full of migrants that are sustainable, with temporary students and the like exist and thrive; cities like Toulouse or Granada. People are happy there, sadly they are the exception. Blame the people that pushed lack of legislation for airbnb rentals so they can make a profit on the 10 apartments they own.
This happens in most of Europe. Europeans are very tribal. These things also exist in Spain. There are landlords who do not rent to foreigners. Spanish people can be very friendly, but they prefer their own people.
I think part of all of this is also simply realizing that not everything is for everyone.
Even as simple as the weather, some people really struggle with the cold, I personally could never live in a tropical climate or somewhere very hot all year. If I had to live there it would be hard for me mentally. And that's fine, people are different and that's great but it also means that some things work for some, and not for others.
Any club that would have me as a member, I wouldn’t want to be a part of.
Germans are tribalistic and racist people. They have no humanly empathy for others. If you are not from german race, you stand no chance.
Should have moved to Munich ❤
If you move to Berlin, you have to forget this idea of you "integrating the society"because this city "integrate you instead" it eats you up and vomit you ….
I feel you , I will move out from Berlin it’s not my city and it’s horrible and dirty
lol . Sorry, but this happened to me and all my friends who moved to Spain, Italy,uk.
That’s how it feels to be a foreigner….
$1 million question : why it is so difficult to smile about life and think about solutions instead of problems ??
I swear it could bring up a lot of joy for everyone and facilitate friendship, way to form a community of people.