Vanessa Van Edwards is the founder of ‘Science of People’, which gives people science-backed skills to improve communication and leadership. She is also the bestselling author of ‘Captivate: The Science of Succeeding with People’ and ‘Cues: Master the Secret Language of Charismatic Communication’.
00:00 Intro
02:13 The Crucial Role of Cues for Success
03:45 I’m a Recovered Awkward Person
05:36 What’s an Ambivert
07:28 One Word Can Change the Way People Think
09:39 The Most Fundamental Skill to Invest In
12:41 The Resting B*tch Face Effect
16:01 Do Not Fake Smile!
18:29 The 97 Cues to Be Warm & Competent
21:44 The Formula to a Perfect Conversation
24:37 Science Reveals Why Some People Are Extremely Popular
28:34 Message People Telling Them This…
33:22 The Luck Experiment
35:05 Being Around Successful People Is Contagious
41:55 The Importance of Hand Gestures
43:38 Hand Tricks to Be Liked
54:15 The Scientific Formula to Be More Charismatic
56:47 The Danger Zone of Being Too Warm or Competent
58:45 The Power Cues
1:07:55 How to Spot a Liar
1:15:23 If You’ve Been Told You’re Intimidating, Do This
1:18:37 Don’t Let Anyone Use This With You
1:21:45 The 6 Questions to Connect With Someone
1:34:20 Leaning Too Much Towards Someone…
1:39:03 How to Greet Someone
1:49:42 How to Master Messaging
1:54:40 Personal Branding
1:59:01 Improve Your Dating Life With These Tips
2:04:27 Body Language and Brain Connection
2:06:33 Are You Awkward? Watch This
2:10:14 How to Get Someone to Approach You
2:15:08 How to Make Friends as an Adult
2:18:57 AirPods Are Killing Friendships
2:22:16 Ads
2:24:08 How to Spot a Liar
2:30:05 Toxic Relationships
2:32:34 How to Start a Conversation With a Stranger
2:37:00 How to Get Started With All This Knowledge
Follow Vanessa:
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You can access the images mentioned, here: https://linktr.ee/diaryofaceostudies
You can purchase Vanessa’s book, ‘Cues: Master the Secret Language of Charismatic Communication’, here: https://amzn.to/3ZFzkcT
You can purchase the The Diary Of A CEO Conversation Cards: Second Edition, here: https://g2ul0.app.link/f31dsUttKKb
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31 Comments
I’ve got a favour to ask! If you enjoy this conversation, please double check that you’ve liked the video and subscribed to the channel! That's a small way you can help us carry on doing this, really appreciate you! ❤🙏🏾
“A man who has friends must himself be friendly,
Proverbs 18:24
Joy. Compassion. Unconditional love. A world full of giggles and self acceptance. Knowing you’re perfect as-is. Not shiny or new, but wonderful for who you are. Just you.
You don’t have to be anything else. To know you’re a good soul who does good in the world and when you mess up it doesn’t matter because you are and always will be loved.
That’s the goal.
#iloveit 🤙🏾🤙🏾🤙🏾
Could it be you may have a touch of the tism?
Is there a better replacement or way to say “how are you?” I use it as a general opener, like a pleasantry. Maybe “How is your day going?” or something?
Interesting perspective! It’s always great to see different takes on this subject. Keep it up!
Downward inflection is interesting. In Australia it's almost a cultural phenomenon to use downward infections just about all the time.
2:18:57 The problem with air pods is that they are wireless and they are difficult to fit in most ears. So people have to have them closer in the ear so they don't fall out. They also don't account for the increase in volume and therefore don't turn the volume down or only use 1 ear bud. So they hear less and feel less engaged by others around them.
Idk bout y'all but cilantro is the best and helps detox you from heavy metals.
this was SO GOOD -love her. thank you x
I had no idea who she was before this video but I’ve never related harder. I remember feeling the same way about my own awkwardness(the spotlight effect is real). I remember going through the process of learning how communication worked scientifically. When I was 16 I asked a mentor if he thought a “studied” charisma was less than an intuitive charisma and I know now it’s not. This information changes lives
"Liars use fewer gestures" makes sense, but also "using gestures makes you more believable". Maybe anybody who doesn't naturally use gestures, you wrongly identify as a liar? How many truthful tetraplegics and autistics are wrongly accused?
And the main problem is: if we know gestures help being believed, even over what might be lies, they twist false words into apparent truth, and sincere words into suspicious manipulation, why should we allow, let alone encourage this oratorical tool?
If we know truth is in the words, and not the gestures, and gestures make us misunderstand all, and mistrust the honest and trust the liars, shouldn't we evolve to ignore these?
I feel like 90% of my relations are ambivalent…
Has it? You are king of bull squirt. This like most your videos, will not age well. 100 percent of people should not need this, wtf is wrong with people in America. This is basic kindergarten type shit. We are broke and weak if this is our interest.
Continue 21:44 bookmark
Only thing I don't like is these concepts are gynocentric view based off egalitarian ideals. A king doesn't give out participation trophies. Society works better hierarchical not woman's definition of respect .
This video is so informative. I can seriously listen to her talk for hours! She is so easy to listen to and well spoken. Absolutely amazing people as intelligent as her exist
As someone who is constantly overwhelmed by picking up on cues and body language, THIS was everything
i am star struck, this woman is simply amazing
This was fascinating
Now I know I have no friends bc I hate everyone so no one must like me 😂
33:38 What about those that suffer from Attention Seeking Syndrome? How should we deal with A.S.S.es?
With the luck experiement, its reversed. People with adhd who struggle to notice things well have a higher input of negative messages theyve received throughout life. They may have overcome SOO many negatives and still be behind the heroes because they had less to overcome. Also, this totally answers the question as to why nuerodiverse people have a hard time with making and KEEPING friends…struggle with out of sight out of mind and are therefore inconsistent with reaching out or thinking about someone. We also struggle with saying nothing or spilling everything on someone. Not that skills cant be improved its just that not everyone starts on an even playing field and your research shows that.
guys wich minute is i missed the memo part
When Vanessa was doing the circular hand motion to show how some manipulate people to nod, it reminded me if Candace Owens. I'm gonna keep an eye out for who does that 😂
Loved this podcast, I learnt so much.
Host has imposter syndrome. Please stop you're a natural at this.
I've been listening to Vanessa Van Edwards for years – even shared some of her videos with staff members who have reported to me. So important to remind ourselves how much our non-verbal language is just as impactful.
Wow. When yhe character question came, i immediately thought about Good Will Hunting. I identity with the character Matt Damon played. 😢😢
Once i heard the growl in her voice, i couldn't stop hearing it. It could just be her voice but I've heard that it used to amplify authority of a subject.
This was one of the most boring presentations! I love most of the ones you have, especially with Chase Hughes! But this woman comes over very bland, has uninteresting features, and comes over very fake.